


The Unabridged Chronicles of Shining Saotome’s Personal Assistant

by KeyboardSmashFics



Category: Uta no Prince-sama
Genre: Comedy, Humor, Multi, Romance, With lots of sarcasm, and lots of paperwork for pyrotechnics, this is basically a coming of age rom com
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2020-05-02 10:53:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 50,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19197343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KeyboardSmashFics/pseuds/KeyboardSmashFics
Summary: A story of music, magic, and finding your place in the world, with a little romance along the way. Oh, and of Shining not doing his paperwork when he’s meant to. That’s a constant issue.





	1. In Which We Meet Our Heroine

“Can someone get wardrobe over here?”

“We have a lighting issue on stage left that needs fixing.”

“Has anyone seen Ren?”

Melody groaned as she navigated her way through the backstage area, walkie-talkie buzzing with the clamor of several different voices. She picked the device up from where it was clipped to her belt and spoke, knocking on the door of dressing room C.

“Don’t worry about wardrobe; I’m handling it. Ringo is looking for Ren now, and I’ll help lighting with whatever wiring they need checked as soon as I’m free.” She paused briefly as a call came from inside the dressing room. “I already talked to the lighting manager in the booth and he said it looks like a blown fuse. Should be down there at any second.”

“Thanks, Miss Pennick,” several voices said at once.

“Yep.” She clipped the walkie-talkie back on her belt and opened the door, already digging in her bag for a needle and thread. Masato, Tokiya, and Natsuki sat in chairs facing the mirror in the enormous dressing area, while the rest of the group either lounged on the sofa and armchairs or paced, unable to stop moving even during intermission.

“Who ripped a shoulder seam?” she asked, holding up a needle. Cecil raised his hand, looking sheepish. Upon closer inspection, it was easy to see where the seam had simply given way on a section of his jacket. She made a "come-hither" motion with her finger and Cecil shrugged off the garment, surrendering it for repair. Melody took the jacket, put aside her bag, and perched on the arm of a chair to complete the quick stitching job.

“Thank you, Mels,” he said sincerely. “You’re the best.”

“It’s just a minor repair,” she said, shrugging him off as she knotted the thread and began sewing up the seam. “If I needed a machine, we’d still have to call wardrobe, but I can fix this. Everyone else okay?” Melody looked up briefly, glancing around the room. The rest of the group nodded.

“Feeling great! It’s an awesome crowd tonight.” Syo punched the air in excitement, a bright smile on his face.

“Good. Oh, Natsuki, look in my bag and grab a couple pieces of the hard candy I keep for Ren when people don’t put out anything but chocolate. You know your blood sugar tends to get low,” she said without looking up.

Melody Pennick, 21 years old, worked as a personal assistant for Shining Saotome. She thought, initially, that the job involved things like scheduling and coffee runs, and it did… sometimes. In reality, it involved essentially anything that Shining wanted her to do in relation to the agency, the idols, or himself. Rather than coffee and paperwork, her tasks generally involved rounding up teen idols and herding them all onto a bus, coordinating pyrotechnics permits that Shining invariably either forgot about or entirely eschewed (she wasn’t certain which yet), occasional graphic design and website formatting, and all in all acting like something a little more akin to a dance mom than an assistant backstage.

Without the yelling, though. No yelling. She just kept track of everything so that no one lost their minds besides, well… herself.

“Found him!” Ringo said cheerfully as the door burst open and Ren came sauntering into the room. Melody’s shoulders sagged in relief, though she did nothing but level a glare at him as she tied off the knot on Cecil’s jacket.

“Uh-oh, you got the big sister death glare…” Natsuki cringed even as he popped a piece of fruit-flavored candy into his mouth.

“I don’t even want to know.” Melody just sighed and handed the jacket back to Cecil.

“Don’t worry, my lady. Masa was hogging the bathroom, so I only wandered down the hall,” he said with his signature thousand-watt smile.

“I certainly was not,” Masato protested. It was quite evident they were headed for an argument, even if it was a good-natured one, so she decided it was appropriate to stop it before things started.

“ _Not_ in the dressing room, boys,” Melody said calmly. “My threat of blackmail still absolutely stands if you bicker backstage.”

Masato and Ren simultaneously blanched.

“Will we ever know what blackmail you have on us?” Syo asked with a sigh.

“Now, why would I spoil the fun like that?” Melody smiled innocently. She shouldered her bag and made to leave, but turned on her heel at the last second, fishing around in the bag’s pockets for something as she walked purposefully towards Tokiya. He looked surprised for a moment, but he didn’t question it when she pressed something into his hands and patted his shoulder gently.

“Eat, idiot.” There was no malice in her voice, but she was firm. Tokiya tended to forget meals, so she always kept healthy snacks on hand for when he looked too quiet or irritable. It was a sure sign he’d forgotten dinner before a gig. Tonight’s reprieve came in the form of a cranberry almond granola bar.

“Heads up, Mels!”

She turned just in time to catch a bottle of water that Otoya threw in her direction. Tokiya glared, but his roommate just shrugged with a sheepish smile. Melody opened the bottle of water and took a long drink.

“Yeah, I know. Hydrate or diedrate. You guys, too.” She put the water bottle in her overlarge bag and took a quick glance around the room. “Anyone need anything else? I’ve gotta go check on a lighting incident…”

“Since when do you repair electrics?” Tokiya asked, eyebrow raised.

“Since the lighting director for the show rage quit due to lack of staff, and even someone with my moderate theater lighting experience is useful,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I may not know a _lot_ about electrics, but I can manage, and I can at least make sure their knots won’t give way on your heads.”

She bustled out of the room as quickly as possible, satisfied everything was in place for the second half of the show, and went to go tend to the lighting situation. The rest of the evening passed in a blur of running around backstage, only stopping long enough to watch Starish run onto the stage for their second performance, high-fiving Haruka as they passed. Their composer usually watched the show from the wings with the other composers and managers. Melody, on the other hand, just waved when she passed while running errands. There wasn’t normally much time to talk in the scramble.

As soon as the last note rang in the hall, Melody snatched her garment bag from dressing room C and bustled back to the backstage bathrooms, practically stripping down while the door was still swinging shut. There wasn’t much time to change clothes, do final checks in the dressing area, and meet the group for the ride to the after party, so an uncomfortably quick change was in order.

Melody unceremoniously tossed her jeans, t-shirt, sneakers, and socks into the garment bag and pulled out her party outfit, a black bodycon dress with a low neckline, a white blazer, and strappy black heels. She pinned up her hair and fixed her makeup at the speed of lightning, tossed her cell phone and ID into a stylish purse rather than an unwieldy tote, rolled up the garment bag, and went back down the hall to the dressing area.

Fortunately, all the boys changed quickly into their suits and were out by the time she got there, probably already on the way to the limo. _Un_ fortunately, it looked like event staff had entirely overlooked the large box of garment bags in the corner of the room that contained the costumes from the first act. It was understandable, in some ways, considering that there were six different groups involved in the show and the venue was massively understaffed, but the box _should_ have been loaded onto the truck going back to the studio already. Grumbling, Melody shouldered her purse, dumped her own garment bag on top of the box, and dialed Shining.

She hefted the box just a little unsteadily and held the phone between her ear and shoulder as she talked, heading for the back door to the venue. With luck, the truck would still be out there, and if not they’d just have to make it fit into Shining’s hired car.

“Ah, Misssss Pennick! Why are you calling me? Aren’t you with the rest of Starish in the limooooo?” Even through the phone his voice was practically deafening, and she winced as she backed through the exit, pushing the door open simply by leaning on it as she adjusted the box in her grip.

“Wait. What? No! You said I would be riding with you,” Melody did her best to keep her frustration out of her voice, but likely failed. “Event staff forgot the first act costumes. I’m on my way to the truck.”

There was a slight commotion from the other end of the line.

“Melody? It’s Ryuya. The truck already left, and I think the limo with Starish and Haruka has gone as well. We can turn around—”

“You’re already almost there, right?” she asked with a sigh. “Don’t worry, I’ll just get a cab or an uber or something. There’s no point in trying to force your way back into this place when all traffic is trying to get out.”

“Are you sure? We can come back. I don’t want you to be on your own in the dark.” Bless Ryuya for thinking of her, but the venue was in a safe area. Maybe she could snag a ride with Quartet Night… Assuming they hadn’t left, too. Then again, they were probably long gone.

“I don’t think— whoa!”

Unfortunately, due to the large boxes in her hands, Melody hadn’t seen that she was quickly approaching a short set of stairs out the back exit. Unable to catch herself, she pitched forward as her foot slipped on the wet concrete, phone and box tumbling from her grip with a thud as her hands flew out in front of her. However, she never actually hit the ground.

Strong arms caught her around the waist, steadying her even as she continued to stumble forward, crashing into a warm chest. After a moment of recovery, Melody breathed a sigh and looked up at the face of her rescuer.

“Thank y— oh.”

Kira Sumeragi. 20 years old. Quiet pianist. Startlingly golden eyes. Member of Heavens, one of several guest groups performing at the same large showcase that Starish performed at. Clearly, everyone had made their own way to their vehicles, but he was dragging behind for some reason. All the paparazzi had moved on, gathering where one of the girl groups that performed that night made a grand exit at another part of the building. So… why was he out here?

“Well, look at this! A real fallen angel,” said another voice. Melody looked over to see a second Heavens member standing slightly to her left.

Van Kiryuin. 25 years old. The flirty type. She knew their profiles and personality types by heart at this point— it was important to keep up on that kind of information in her line of work, even for rival groups. _Especially_ for rival groups.

“You okay?” Van asked.

“I… shit!” She cursed under her breath and backed away, snatching up her phone from the ground. “Yes, hi. I’m here. I’ll meet you and the boys there. Okay, bye.”

Melody groaned and hung up the phone with a faint “beep.” Well, at by now she knew she’d officially missed her ride. Time to call a cab to get her to the after party location. She was about to start dialing when she suddenly remembered the two men standing near her, not to mention the box that she’d dropped.

“Thanks. Sorry. I’m fine, I’m just… uh… it’s been a long night,” Melody said, flustered. She bent to pick up the box, snatching the two garment bags that fell out when she dropped it and stuffing them back inside.

“Are those costumes for Starish?” Kira asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’re their manager, aren’t you?”

“Uh…” Melody paused. Not technically, but it wasn’t the first time she’d been asked that question. Starish didn’t technically _have_ a manager, but she really did fill the role. “Something like that. Kind of. I’m Shining’s personal… uh… everything. Melody Pennick. Hi.”

She grasped the box and made to stand with it, but cried out in pain when she put weight on her right ankle and was forced to re-evaluate.

“Looks like you could use a hand,” Van said, offering to help her up. Melody leaned on him gratefully, though she wondered how she’d make it to a taxi and the party with her ankle in bad shape. She must have twisted it tumbling down the stairs.

“Thanks. I appreciate it, but you guys should get going if you want to make it to the party,” she said, making a shooing motion with her hands.

“Are you not going as well?” Kira asked, gesturing to her outfit.

“Well, I was, but Shining did what Shining does and took off, so I’ll need to catch a cab. It’s fine, though.” Melody shrugged, but Van clapped his hands together gleefully.

“Good! Problem solved. Kira, be a good man and grab that box, won’t ya?”

“Oh, that’s not necessa—aaaa?” Melody let out a slight yelp as Van swept her up off the ground in a perfect princess carry, apparently entirely unphased. “Um, you should put me down, Mr. Kiryuin. There are cameras,” she hissed, looking over towards the paparazzi on the far side of the building.

“Call me Van. They aren’t looking this way, and if they are, they won’t bother with me,” he said with a bright smile. “Besides, I can’t just leave an angel in need. You can ride with us to the party.”

“… _us_?” Melody squeaked.

“Heavens,” Kira clarified as he hefted the box, in a tone that said that she must be quite dull if she hadn’t picked up on that.

“Is that really the best idea? Not that I’m not grateful.”

Kira shrugged, but Melody could read every word in that motion. It was probably difficult to argue when Van’s mind was made up, and she certainly wasn’t in a position to refuse the help. Ankle aside, she was quite literally unable to do anything from her position in Van’s arms, and simply watched as he carried her over to a large, black limo in a dark corner of the parking area. It practically blended in with the shadows, so it was no wonder the cameras missed it and no one was hounding the group.

Kira asked the driver to place the costume box in the trunk, and Van deposited Melody right into the limo’s back seat, sliding in next to her. She barely had time to register what was happening before questions started flying.

“I thought you went back to grab your wallet, not a date.” Yamato Hyuga sighed impatiently, raising his eyebrow at Melody.

“She has a staff pass, idiot. Unless he planned to snag a staff member for a date, and I don’t think that was his goal.” From the far corner of the limo, Nagi Mikado pointed towards the badge on a red lanyard that hung from her neck. Melody shrunk a little in the face of an unfamiliar group. She wasn’t particularly fond of new people in general, and idols were an especially volatile kind of person. Thankfully, it appeared that Raging Otori was nowhere to be found, and the only passengers in the back were the members of Heavens themselves.

“This is Melody. You guys have seen her before hanging around Starish. Shining stranded her and she twisted her ankle heading down the stairs, so we’re giving her a ride,” Van said cheerfully. “Go on, buckle up.”

Melody bit her lip and did as he asked. She discreetly fired off a text to the group chat to let them know all was well. Besides just members of the agency, the Starish boys were her friends, and they were probably getting worried around now.

_Me: Shining stranded me. Again. Hitched a ride with Heavens. Long story. See you there._

Her phone immediately started buzzing with incoming texts, but she turned the ringer on silent and ignored them for now. “Long story, see you there” means “no time to explain.” Around that moment, Kira entered the limo and buckled himself into the empty seat, signaling for the driver to head off towards the party.

“Did Shining seriously strand you?” A boy with bright purple eyes gazed at her with apparently genuine concern. _Eiji Otori_ , she thought.

“Yeah, it happens,” she said with a shrug. “He doesn’t do it from any ill will, it just… is what it is. I sometimes can catch up to the boys and ride with them and Haruka if he takes off with Ringo and Ryuya, but I didn’t quite make it this time.”

While she spoke, Van fiddled with something in one of the limo’s compartments. She didn’t pay attention, mostly focused on trying to read the expressions around the room and subtly adjusting her ankle to try and relieve the pain.

“Well, at least you’re not offering rides to random women, even if she is a member of a rival agency.” Ah. Glasses man. Melody knew he must be Eiichi Otori, self-appointed group leader. Extremely loyal and hard-working, would do anything for his group, but admittedly kind of a jackass. At least, what she’d seen of him in the past. They’d never directly spoken.

“Well, she was carrying a big box all on her own, fell down the stairs, and twisted her ankle. What was I supposed to do but offer help?” Van shrugged, and Melody finally saw what he’d been doing. There was a refrigerator, albeit a small one, and he was rummaging for ice. “Here, take this.”

“Thanks,” she said gratefully. It was so cold that it stung a little, but it would at least keep the swelling down. “You all performed very well tonight. Congratulations.” Melody smiled softly, hoping they would take her comment seriously. They were a very talented group despite the questionable nature of Raging Otori’s… Well, everything. He was just questionable in general at this point.

“Thank you.” Shion, looking sleepy, finally spoke. “Did I see you fixing a stage light during intermission? You were… dressed differently.” He seemed to be processing the situation, tilting his head in a way that was a little birdlike as he scrutinized her.

“Um, sort of?” Melody rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly. “I was just making sure the rigging was right so that it at least wouldn’t fall on anyone. They had to replace the entire lighting crew two days before the performance and only about two of them even know anything about the system in this place.”

“And you do?”

“I have experience with a weirdly wide range of things, thanks to Shining. Even three months on the job makes you learn a lot more than you think you’re prepared for when it comes to him.”

“I’ll bet,” Yamato said with an amused snort. He looked quite a bit like his brother in that moment, but she didn’t dare say that out loud.

The rest of the ride passed in mostly amicable soft chatter. It was evident that the Heavens members were tired, and Melody knew they certainly had reason to be. Big events like this were as tiring for the performers as for the organizers, and she didn’t plan to press them to converse with her, especially since they’d been kind enough to give her a ride. Well, _Van_ had been kind enough and the rest hadn’t kicked her out, which was good enough.

When they arrived, Melody waited while the others slipped out of the limo and onto the red carpet. She would go back around with the driver to the parking area, hand off the costumes, and then meet the others inside. The last thing she needed was more pictures of herself. “Who is this mysterious woman?” was the most frequent tabloid headline when she was seen near Starish, no matter how many times it was confirmed and re-confirmed that she worked for Shining.

“Thank you so much for the ride. I really appreciate it.”

“Are you certain you’ll be fine on your own?” Kira asked.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, thanks. Just no dancing for me tonight,” Melody said with a laugh.

“Aww, that’s a shame. You’ll have to save me one the next time, then.” Van winked, and Melody couldn’t help but blink back in surprise. He reminded her a little of Ren, but more… boyish? Playful?

In any case, tonight had been wild enough already. She hoped that, for once, the party might actually be a relaxing affair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, all! This fic is close to finished, so I thought I'd start posting the chapters here. Hope you all enjoy this dose of rom com fanfic, because I had fun writing it.


	2. In Which Drinks Are Had

She was wrong.

After Ryuya loaded the box into the back of Starish’s limo for the evening and helped her carefully limp her way into the party, Melody simply stationed herself at one of the back corner tables, sitting on a comfy chair and watching the chaos around her. There was a dance floor full of people, a table full of food, and plenty of other idols, composers, and agency members were milling around. However, the huge crowd made her feel uneasy rather than energetic.

She closed her eyes and rubbed her temples, trying to ignore the impending headache. Maybe she should just call a cab and go home, but they were expecting her to be here, and actually showing your face in public was an important part of the job…

“Here.”

A soft _clunk_ on the metal table made Melody open her eyes. She looked up to see a tall glass filled with clear liquid in front of her, a lime wedge at the edge of the cup, and Ren sitting across from her. Her brow furrowed in confusion, but Ren wasted no time in explaining.

“Mojito. Coconut rum. You looked like you could use it, and there’s an open bar,” he said with a shrug. Melody heaved a sigh and smiled, taking a long sip of her drink. Ren was the only one who could have gotten her a drink out of the group anyways, as he was the only one who was 20, and she couldn’t have been more grateful. With luck, it would help dull the pain from her twisted ankle as well.

“I know we bicker a lot, but you’re the best,” she said sincerely.

“Think of it as payment for all the chocolate replacement candy you carry around for me.” He gave a lopsided smile, but didn’t seem to have any intent to leave. “So… How’s Van doing?”

“You spoke to him?” Melody winced.

“Yes. He was quite offended that I hadn’t mentioned how pretty you were when I told him Shining had yet another new assistant,” Ren said with a laugh. “He also said you twisted your ankle. How are you feeling, my lady?”

“It’s a little sore, but I have alcohol and a comfy chair, so I’ll be fine. Thanks, Ren.” Melody shooed him off with a smile. “Go be a social butterfly.”

Ren smiled, scooped up her hand, and kissed it in his traditional gallant gesture. Melody was unphased by now, though it had startled her the first time he did it months ago. It was sweet of him, though, no matter how much time passed. She continued drinking her mojito and watching the crowds, trying to pick out people that she knew from the performance. Some of the girls from the younger girl group were attempting to flirt with Camus. Bless their hearts, Melody thought. They had no idea what they were getting into. Off in the corner, a few members of Heavens talked with Natsuki and Syo, obviously joking around and enjoying each other’s company. Raging was nowhere to be seen, and neither was Shining, which didn’t exactly bode well… but that wasn’t part of her job description, thankfully.

Then again, _most_ of what she did wasn’t part of her job description. Becoming Starish’s honorary manager certainly wasn’t part of it, but it mostly just _happened_. She didn’t do it on purpose. The whole thing started with Melody sneaking granola bars into her bag to give to Tokiya when she realized he’d forgotten to eat again, and then she learned that Ren didn’t like chocolate, so she always packed fruit-flavored sweets for him. After that it was learning about other things, like Natsuki’s occasional low blood sugar, Syo’s tendency to trip on the hems of his costumes when they were a little too long, Masato’s dislike of anything bug-related… Well, it just ended in her taking care of them, and no one complained. Some of them actually called her their big sister now, if jokingly, and she couldn’t say she minded.

A clatter of footsteps and a flash of dark red at the corner of her vision drew Melody out of her thoughts. She looked up over the edge of her glass to find a red-headed composer looking down at her.

“Are you okay? Hyuga-sensei said you injured yourself?” Haruka asked, eyes wide. She looked adorable in a frilly, knee-length red dress that offset her eerily yellow eyes perfectly, and Melody couldn’t help but compare herself to the young composer.

Well, not that young. There were only three years’ difference between them, but Melody felt like she was looking at a much younger girl. Haruka’s first year at Saotome Academy was after Melody graduated, after she’d been booted out into the world as a young idol, and…

Entirely failed.

Well, she supposed she didn’t _entirely_ fail. She’d managed to release a few songs, but her mental health quickly degraded into worsening stage fright that she never quite managed to kick, which degraded to panic attacks and heart issues, and she’d been forced to abandon her career in order to salvage what was left of her mind. Instead of performing as a singer, she took a job with the local symphony and returned to her first instrumental love: clarinet. There she’d stayed until a little over three months ago, working symphony jobs at night and jobs in theater costume shops during the day, until she picked up the phone to hear Ringo’s voice.

_“Hi, honey! We’re just doing a checkup on our students to see how you’re all doing out there. What’s been going on?”_

Melody broke down over the phone. She wasn’t happy. She felt stagnated. She didn’t know what she wanted from her life, and she didn’t know where to go to make herself feel like she was even doing anything productive again. Her whole life revolved around theater seasons and concert cycles, and she slept and ate and worked and did nothing else.

Three days later, Ringo called back with an invitation to apply for a job as Shining’s personal assistant. Melody thought that it couldn’t hurt to take a chance, and Shining hired her on the spot, much to the surprise of the other teachers and the board.

So, here she was. Going on four months an employee of Shining Agencies, currently the third longest standing personal assistant to Shining Saotome in the history of his career, and with no plans to go anywhere. She did feel healthier and happier, but she couldn’t help but look at Haruka and wonder if she’d ever accomplish as much as that girl. Needless to say, her own relative lack of accomplishments despite having the same training made her feel a little bitter, no matter how sweet Harkua was. And she _was_ sweet, so it was hard to be overly jealous.

It was just... _also_ hard to constantly be surrounded by successful idols and producers and realize that her life, in comparison, was a real flop.

“I’m fine, really. It’s not a big deal, and you know I don’t do well at these parties anyways, so it’s just an excuse for me to sit in the corner peacefully.” Melody shrugged off Haruka a little awkwardly, already feeling a tingling sensation at the base of her skull from the alcohol. She wondered briefly how much rum was in her drink, but quickly decided that she didn’t care.

“Are you sure? No one would quiet down after you sent that text, and then you didn’t reply. I think they were really stressed about it,” she said, frowning.

“I can take care of myself and I didn’t want to be rude by texting when they’d offered me a ride. Plus, I thought it would be easier to explain in person. Event staff messed up with the costumes and then Shining left me again.”

“I can’t believe he keeps doing that…” Haruka pressed her hand to her mouth in concern.

“He doesn’t do it on purpose. I think.” Melody’s nose wrinkled in distaste. “Don’t worry about me, though. Go enjoy the party. You’ve got at least three groups full of boys who want to dance with you.”

“Are you sure you wouldn’t like some company?” She seemed genuinely concerned, but there was no reason to be.

“I’ve been running around like a chicken with its head cut off all night. I’m just happy to get off my feet for a little while and not have to worry about small talk. It stresses me out.” Of course, she was perfectly capable of making small talk, it was just that she didn’t _want_ to.

“Okay, if you’re sure. I’ll see you for group breakfast tomorrow, then? At the hotel?”

“Yep, I’ll be there!” Melody flashed a thumbs up and a smile, and Haruka bounded off to go talk to… someone. Anyone. Any of the eleven boys obviously at least half in love with her from Shining Agencies, or possibly one of the Heavens members that seemed to dote on her as well. Despite largely keeping her distance from other idols, Melody observed how they acted at parties and interviews, and she could just _tell_. She wasn’t sure what it was about Haruka that made people fall in love with her, but there had to be something.

Ugh, jealousy was a bitch. Not that Melody particularly _wanted_ a pop idol to be in love with her. It seemed like too much trouble, and she didn’t have feelings for any of the idols she knew. How could she, realistically? They never spent much time together outside of professional settings, and there was no point in falling in love with the same daydream that the cameras captured. Melody just wanted one person, and she supposed she was just a little jealous that Haruka had a small harem and was oblivious.  
  
That was fine, really, considering they were all celebrities with "no romance" written into their contracts. Melody wanted... Well, preferably someone normal. Smart. Made her laugh.

That was the least of her issues right now, though. Romance could happen after her life was back in order.

For now, she focused on sipping her mojito, and after that was gone, she sipped on a vodka cranberry… and then a glass of water, dropped off unceremoniously by Tokiya without a single word of greeting, complete with his suspicious raised eyebrow of judgment. She barely remembered the conversations with Ryuya and Ringo, Shining never showed up, and generally everyone seemed to leave her alone. The large bamboo plant by the chair did quite a bit to hide her from the rest of the room, so unless someone was specifically looking for her, they didn’t wander that way, and Melody was happy to people-watch in silence.

Near the end of the evening, possibly aware that Melody was stranded without transportation back to the hotel, Quartet Night made their way over, obviously gathering their coats to leave. It was late, well past two in the morning, and time for at least some of the partygoers to wind down and make their way back to their rooms for the night.

“Come. You may ride with us,” Camus said with a long sigh, offering his arm. Melody’s shoulders slumped, but she nodded, stood from her chair, and took his arm.

“Thanks, Camus.”

“You’re quite welcome.”

“You can drop the gentleman prince act, though. You know the change in your voice creeps me out,” she said quietly as they exited the room. Her speech wasn’t _quite_ slurred, but she was certainly more blunt than she might have been while entirely sober. Camus let out an amused huff, but he did not respond.

“How is your ankle? We were told you were injured.” Ai looked pointedly down at her ankle as they exited the building, possible trying to determine if there was any swelling.

“I swear, is Van spilling the story of me tumbling down a staircase to everyone? It’s not exactly the highlight of my evening.”

“Ren told us.” Ranmaru just shrugged.

Great. So _Ren_ was telling stories about her clumsiness.

“Shit ow fuck motherfucking ankle shitballs!” Melody groaned as she tripped on the edge of the uneven pavement near the limo. She probably would have fallen, but Reiji caught her arm firmly and kept her upright. Ranmaru laughed outright as he slid into the limo.

“I think I like her tipsy. Can we keep her like that?”

“The alcohol was supposed to _dull_ the pain,” Melody grumbled. “Thanks, Reiji.”

“Are you an angry drunk?” Reiji asked, laughing in a way that made Melody understand that he was entirely kidding. He touched the tip of her nose lightly while she rolled her eyes.

“No, I’m just a paragon of salt and I curse like a sailor. So. Normal me, but less filter.” More carefully this time, Melody slipped inside Quartet Night’s transportation for the evening, buckled her seatbelt, and mentally made a note to drink another glass of water before she went to bed.

“What did you think of the show?” Reiji asked cheerfully. The streetlamps flew past outside the windows of the limousine, rolling down a highway towards the hotel they’d checked into earlier that week.

“I thought it went really well, or at least, what I could see of it,” she admitted.

“You weren’t watching from the wings with Haruka?” Ai asked curiously.

“When have you ever known her to sit still long enough to do that?” Ranmaru crossed his arms over his chest, though he didn’t look angry about it, simply unsurprised.

“I had a lighting issue to deal with, and then I checked on Starish and you guys, and then I wound up running around and tracking down a misplaced costume delivery that came to the Starish dressing room and should have gone to the other end of the building… It was a nightmare.”

“You would think they would be more organized,” Camus said disdainfully. For once, she had to agree with him.

“I heard a lot of their employees either quit or went on strike about two days ago, so staff was shaky at best. They were really just lucky that they managed to round up enough people with even moderate experience to run the show on schedule.”

“What made them react that way?” Ai leaned in, curious, but Melody only threw her hands up helplessly, sagging against the leather seats.

“We’re not sure yet. They’re keeping it under wraps, which is smart PR for this show but will probably kill them in the grand scheme. As soon as it goes public, everyone will want to know why it didn’t go public before the show.”

“This is why you’ve survived so long as Shining’s assistant,” Camus said pointedly, raising his teacup in her direction. She wasn’t sure where he managed to get a teacup full of steaming tea in a limo, but Melody didn’t question these things anymore. That was an incredibly high compliment from him, too, and he rarely complimented anyone, so she just decided to bask in it while she could.

“Thank you, though I do think it has something to do with me constantly filling out landing permits for his helicopters and making sure the paperwork for all the pyrotechnics is in order.”

Thankfully, the drive to the hotel wasn’t long, but it was enough time that she regained a little of her good sense. Melody’s head wasn’t quite clear by the time she stepped out of the limo, but it was clear enough that she could feel the pain in her ankle quite sharply, and she winced when she put weight on it. Clearly, it had started to swell on the way back. In the morning she would be able to tell how bad it was, or perhaps have the hotel doctor take a look if necessary.

“Come on, pipsqueak,” Ranmaru said. Before Melody had a chance to react, he hooked an arm around her thighs and lifted her over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry. She spluttered and struggled against the hold, but Ranmaru’s arm only tightened around her thigh, keeping her firmly in place.

“Pipsqueak?! What the hell—”

“Keep it down,” he sighed, shaking his head as he began to walk towards the building. “And stop struggling. I don’t want to drop you and sprain something else.”

“I am _not_ a pipsqueak. And could you maybe put me down so that I don’t flash my underwear to the entire hotel?”

“Hope you picked nice underwear, then,” he said gruffly, though Melody noted that the other three were walking carefully ahead of them, and that Camus used his access card to go in the back entrance rather than through the lobby.

“I’ll meet you back at the room after I take her up,” Ranmaru said, looking towards Ai. His band mate nodded and turned down the hallway while Ranmaru went towards a different elevator, Melody still hoisted over his shoulder. She finally resigned herself to her fate and relaxed as he pressed the button for the fourth floor. The rest of them were up on the tenth floor, but she had a smaller room all to herself for the trip. Being in management had a few perks, including that they didn’t make her room with Haruka and she got to keep to herself most of the time. Privacy was lovely.

He put her down surprisingly gently in front of the door, and Melody fumbled for her keys for a moment. The jingling sound seemed loud in the silence of the hall, as did the sound of the bolt unlocking.

“You _are_ a pipsqueak, you know,” Ranmaru said, raising his eyebrows.

“Am not. You’re not that much older than me,” she grumbled.

“Two years older but thirty centimeters taller. _Haruka_ is taller than you, actually.”

“Not _thirty_!” she protested. Twenty-seven. Tops. And so what if Haruka was taller?!

“Close enough. Go to bed.” He rolled his eyes and made to shut the door, but Melody stopped him.

“Hey, Ran?”

“Hm?”

“Thanks. It would have hurt to walk up here by myself and taken a lot longer.”

“Mm.”

It was as close to a “you’re welcome” as she expected to get from Ranmaru. He was a man of few words, and he could be kind of clumsy about showing he cared, but he wasn’t a _bad_ guy.

Melody stared at the closed door for a moment before she moved, trying to process everything that happened that evening. Unfortunately, it felt like her very bones were made of lead, or maybe jell-o, and her mind wasn’t processing the events like it was made of anything better than jell-o, either. She carefully knelt and undid the ribbons on her shoes, flicked off the light switch, and limped her way to the bed. Blazer discarded haphazardly on the floor, Melody flopped into the bed and surrendered herself to sleep.


	3. In Which Hot Dogs are Had

The sun streamed through the open curtains with a merciless kind of brightness that only accompanies a slight hangover. Melody groaned and threw a pillow over her head, but she knew it was useless. Her throat was dry and her head hurt, and though they weren’t due to leave the city until tomorrow in order to give the idols a chance to rest and do some publicity gigs, she still had to get up. Breakfast and recap were at 9AM sharp, and it was…

6:06. So read the digital clock.

 _Ew_.

Melody checked that the alarm on her phone was set, rolled back over, and did her best to sleep, but utterly failed. The sun was up, the zipper of her dress was digging into her side where she’d slept on it all night, and she was already panicking about the thirty things that needed to get done today, so she might as well shower.

“Stupid fucking sun. Stupid fucking rum. Stupid fucking lightweight…” she grumbled under her breath, dragging herself out of bed and over to the bathroom.

The sight of her own face in the mirror made her jump. She wasn’t sure if she looked like a melting raccoon from going to bed without removing her makeup, or because there were dark circles under her eyes from not sleeping well for several nights in a row. The trip was a major stress point for her, and even after the show’s completion, she hadn’t been able to rest. The alcohol just made her more tired and dehydrated on top of it, and Melody was already looking forward to crawling back into bed this evening.

Cursing her inability to hold her alcohol, she ran some tap water into a glass and forced herself to drink from it before she even removed her makeup or dislodged the pins from her tangled hair. It wasn’t the first time she’d had a little much to drink for her constitution at a party, but she always regretted it the next morning, especially when she had something professional to do.

Ah, well. The show must go on.

Melody showered, combed out the knots in her unruly hair, scrubbed the dregs of makeup from her face, and ruffled through her suitcase to try and find something to wear for the day. If they were out on the town, she needed to dress somewhat professionally, but “professional” did not mean “frumpy” in this industry. She’d learned, over the last few months, that toeing the line somewhere between a college professor and, well… _Ringo_ … was probably the area to shoot for. Black crop top with a sweetheart neckline, fitted black pants, and a pastel pink blazer with a floral print was the outfit of the day. Though her heels lay discarded by the door, she kicked them aside in favor of calf-height combat boots with sturdy laces that would help support her still tender ankle. She covered her dark circles with makeup, let her damp brown curls hang loose over her shoulder to dry, and carefully made her way downstairs for breakfast, a book in hand.

The boots seemed to help with ankle support, she thought as she walked into the dining area and chose a seat at one of the long tables. If they went out on the town today, she should be fine to walk around in practical footwear. Maybe.

It was only 8:15, so there was plenty of time before their scheduled breakfast meeting, but that just gave her a few minutes to read and shake off the last of her sleepy daze. Pulling out a battered, pocket-sized copy of _Fahrenheit 451_ from inside her purse, Melody sat down to immerse herself in her book for a short while before breakfast. Perhaps reading something familiar would help clear her head.

She wasn’t sure how long she sat there and read, but Montag was in the middle of trying to shake off the Hound the next time Melody realized the rest of the world existed.

“Good morning.”

A soft voice pulled her out of her novel, and she looked up to see Masato holding out a cup of steaming green tea towards her. He looked much more presentable than she felt, dressed to the nines and ready to go out on the town even before their morning meeting. Tokiya trailed behind him with a cup of coffee in hand, and they both took seats at the table.

“Good morning,” Melody echoed, accepting the cup of tea. She’d completely failed to take advantage of the self-serve coffee and tea in her sleepy stupor, but sipping the tea did make her feel more awake. “How did you two sleep?”

“Perfectly well, thank you,” Masato said politely.

“It was much-needed rest after the concert,” Tokiya agreed. “How are you feeling?”

“Oh, I’m doing fine,” she said cheerfully, tucking the book back into her purse. “Where are you all headed on your publicity run today?” Masato’s eyes narrowed in a way that said he was suspicious, though didn’t question her outright.

“Tokiya and I are going with Reiji to look at some of the historical sites, and the other groups are headed to the shopping district and the arts district.” He took a sip of his tea, gaze briefly traveling to where other members of their group were making their way down for breakfast. As the rest of their group entered the dining room, hotel staff came out to take their orders for food.

“I… don’t actually know what I’m doing today,” Melody admitted. Her schedule was a mutable, living thing that liked to bite back when she least expected it. The best way to plan was to make no plans, which ended up with a lot of paperwork to do when they returned to town, but it was just better for her nerves if she went with the flow.

“Goooooood morning!”

A rumbling voice like that could only belong to Shining, the only man in existence who had the energy to be that enthusiastic at this time of the morning after a party that went so late.

“Good morning, Mr. Saotome,” Melody said, putting forth a chipper morning energy that she did not at all feel. Instead of a book, this time she pulled a planner from her bag, ready to jot down notes from the morning meeting as she nibbled on her bacon and egg sandwich. However, it turned out that there wasn’t much she needed to write. All the idols had their assignments and schedules already, and all Shining did was congratulate them on their performance, remind them of the time their flight left the next morning, and turn back to Melody.

“Miss Pennick, take Miss Nanami out around the city! Inspiration abounds!” He waved his arms in a wide arc, practically sparkling as he spoke. “Find something that speaks to you. The new duet projects are going to be the most fantastic Starish songs yet!”

“Is that really the best idea?” Ren hissed. “Ankle injury, remember?”

“That’s why I booked a bus tour this morning!” Ringo said brightly, waving two tickets in the air. “Nanami and Pennick will take a tour of the city to give Haruka some chance to soak up inspiration for the upcoming album, and the rest of you have your assignments for the day!”

Well, Melody supposed there were worse things than spending the day with Haruka. This was mostly why she didn’t make any plans. A normal personal assistant would accompany Shining wherever he went, but it turned out that Shining Saotome was a very private man, and bring his personal assistant was more like being a… lackey? Henchman? Maybe something less nefarious… Right hand man?

And now she was singing Hamilton.

In any case, it wasn’t the first time that she needed to act as Haruka’s glorified babysitter, and it wouldn’t be the last, though she didn’t do it often. At least Ringo had thought ahead enough to find them a bus tour, but they would just have to play it by ear from there.

* * *

The bus tour was passable. Haruka seemed to enjoy it, jotting down thoughts in her staff paper notebook as they rode through the city. Melody found the historical information interesting, but she would have rather seen the city on foot. As it was, she made notes of a few places that Haruka might want to visit after the tour, took pictures of some particularly interesting sights that she wanted to try to sketch later, and otherwise enjoyed the tour in near silence.

They stepped off the bus around noon, dropped off at the same place that they started.

“Is there anywhere else you want to go today?” Melody asked. “I know I’m not up for walking several miles, but we could make a few stops on the way back to the hotel. There were pastry shops a few blocks down, and the arts district is back that way.” She pointed in the vague direction that the bus just came from. Well, she hoped that was the direction of the arts district.

“No,” Haruka shook her head, though she was smiling. “I had fun, but there isn’t anywhere else.”

Melody fought the urge to groan. Haruka was almost too flexible sometimes. Ankle or no ankle, Melody didn’t want to just go back to the hotel. It was a beautiful day outside, and there was even a park across the street with a creek and a waterfall and—

Her stomach suddenly let out the most unholy growling noise that had ever been known to man.

Melody blinked slowly, turning back towards Haruka.

“Okay… you know what? I’m hungry. We’re going to the park and we’re getting hot dogs for lunch,” she declared. “Let’s go.” She took off down the sidewalk without another word, leaving Haruka scrambling to catch up in the face of Melody’s single-minded determination to secure food in the sunshine.

“Are you sure you’re feeling up to it?” the younger girl asked, panting a little.

“It’s a mild sprain, not the African bird flu!” Melody rolled her eyes and hit the button to trigger the crosswalk sign. “Look, I appreciate the concern, but I’m not dying and I don’t need crutches. I’m also really _fucking_ hungry, so let’s go get some food on Shining’s tab, okay?”

“Okay!”

It was amazing how Haruka could go from worried to amazingly cheerful in one second flat. She was a hard worker and very softhearted, but Melody really couldn’t seem to get a handle on her personality. Outside of being a composer and playing the piano, there wasn’t much that she seemed to really enjoy. She visited her grandmother sometimes, listened to music in order to compose new songs, and sometimes tried to cook, but never with anything other than ordinary successes.

Actually, other than the newly gleaned fact that Haruka liked her hot dogs with just ketchup, Melody barely knew anything about her personality at all. The other Starish members seemed to scream their existence from the top of a mountain, but maybe that was because they were performers.

Hot dogs and chips in hand, Melody and Haruka sat on a bench under a tree to watch the people at the park while they ate.

“This… is going to get messy,” Melody said, nose scrunching as she spread out napkins over her lap. A hot dog with mustard, chili, onions, and relish could not possibly be a mess-free meal, but it was worth it. And if she spilled, well… her pants were black. She’d live for a few more hours.

“It’s really good,” Haruka confirmed, though Melody wondered how satisfying a hot dog with just ketchup could really be.

“I like cooking them over a fire on skewers more than anything, but you’ve kinda got to go camping for that, or have a fire pit.” Mmmm, the satisfaction of good chili. Park hot dogs might not be camp out quality, but they sure hit the spot when you were hungry.

“I’ve never done that.” Haruka looked off into the distance, eyes following a small child playing with a dog. She smiled softly as she watched, sun caught in her orange hair like some kind of sparkling portrait. It made Melody feel a little clunky by comparison in her strange combination of blazer, crop top, and combat boots, but that was something she’d just need to get used to around Haruka. Probably other people felt clunky around her, too. Even when she was clumsy, the girl seemed to have the grace of an ethereal fairy, and someone was always there to catch her.

 _Well, someone did catch_ me _last night_.

Melody munched on her hot dog in silence and mentally thanked whatever power placed Kira in her path. She would have much worse than a slightly sprained ankle if it wasn’t for him.

“Maybe we can have a bonfire outside at the dorms one night. Make hot dogs. Roast marshmallows…” Melody mused. She was sure there was somewhere around there with a fire pit, and if not, it wouldn’t be difficult to make one.

“That would be nice. Everyone could come enjoy the outdoors.” Ah. She had that dreamy look on her face— that meant Haruka was on board.

Melody thought about a small bonfire as she scouted a trash can so she could toss their lunch remains. As chaotic as normal happenings were around the dorms and on trips, it would be a small miracle if they all survived that, but it would be fun. She’d have to remember to get an extra bag of marshmallows just for Camus, and on top of that, wasn’t it time for him to have a dentist appointment? How did that man not have a mouth full of cavities?

“Hey, it’s Nanami!”

Melody turned towards the sound of the voice to find Haruka already waving to a small group of familiar faces. Van, Yamato, and Eiji walked towards them, dressed to the nines and obviously coming from song kind of PR work. The other Heavens members couldn’t be far behind them. Haruka was already jogging off towards them, a bright smile on her face. Relations between Heavens and Starish had improved, and apparently relations between Heavens and the Starish composer had also drastically improved. She spoke to them like friends, chattering wildly as Melody stayed off to the side, not wanting to interrupt but feeling a little awkward waiting for their conversation to end.

After a minute or two, Van seemed to notice her loitering awkwardly, and instead of watching her throw glances to the side while Haruka engaged in her own private conversation, he took action. It only took a few strides for him to make it over to Melody, and she found herself staring up at him as he smiled down at her.

“Don’t be shy, cutie,” he said genially, gently putting an arm around Melody’s shoulders to guide her over towards the group. In that moment, she was positive that he was the only person in the world who could manage to say something like that without it sounding incredibly creepy. “You look nice today.”

“Um— ah— thanks?” she spluttered, just trying not to trip over her own feet as she was dragged into the conversation.

“I was just telling Nanami here that we’re on break from a photoshoot. What brings you lovely ladies to this area of town?” Van didn’t remove his arm from around her shoulders, though his grip was loose.

“We took a bus tour, and then Melody suggested heading to the park.” Haruka smiled, seemingly oblivious to exactly how _friendly_ Van was.

“I was craving a hot dog,” Melody admitted sheepishly. She gently stepped away from him, letting his arm slip from around her, but he didn’t seem offended.

“I wouldn’t have pegged you for a hot dog lover,” Van said, smiling lopsidedly in a way that Melody couldn’t help but think was adorable.

“Ah, that means my evil scheme is working.” Melody smiled, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Evil scheme?” Haruka raised an eyebrow.

“Mm-hmm. The evil scheme where I make you think I’m a professional who’s been in the business for years when I’m really making it up as I go along and praying everything works out.” She flashed a thumbs up, laughing softly.

“I think it’s going devilishly well for you.” Van winked pointedly. Melody balked, blinking, and turned away as her cheeks flushed slightly.

“How much longer are you in the city, Nanami?” Yamato asked.

“Just until tomorrow. I thought I would spend the rest of the day writing. We got some great ideas on the bus tour around the city!”

Did they? Melody wondered. Maybe it was her own creative failings that made her unable to gather much inspiration from a bus tour with a guide who was far from enthusiastic.

“Aw, I hoped you and Starish could come visit with us sometime before you left,” Eiji said sadly. Something about his puppy dog eyes made her think od Reiji— absolutely irresistible, and much more innocent than even Reiji could look, but maybe that was his age working in his favor. Haruka turned slowly to face her, yellow eyes wide and pleading.

“They have the evening off, _technically_ ,” Melody said with a sigh. “I can’t guarantee they’ll be up for anything, but you can ask.”

“So you _are_ their manager.” Eiichi appeared seemingly from nowhere, cleaning his glasses and looking for all the world like he owned the park, the street, or maybe the whole city.

“In that I manage their schedules and take care of all the paperwork that Shining either doesn’t want to do or purposefully forgets exists, yeah, you could say that,” she said with a snort. “Otherwise, I’m no more their manager than you are Rodger Rabbit in a pair of glasses.”

“I knew it. You’re funny _and_ cute.” Van’s thousand-watt smile made Melody freeze for a short moment, but she brushed him off nonchalantly. Her cheeks were red, though. She could feel the warmth.

“I’m just doing my job,” she murmured.

“Don’t accost Shining’s employees, Van,” Shion sighed. “Pay no attention. He’s a habitual flirt.”

“I am _always_ sincere.” Van drew an “x” over his heart with his index finger as if marking his honesty.

“Right.” Eiichi sighed and put his glasses back on. “Excuse us, but we should be going. We _do_ hope to see you tonight though,” he said politely. Now that… that sounded a little creepy, which was odd, considering the sentence in itself was more innocent. Maybe it was some of the bias Melody held from hearing how Heavens once tried to snipe Haruka as a composer.

“Have a good day,” Melody said habitually, waving as they passed. The Heavens members waved and smiled back, except for Van, who cheerfully blew them a kiss in the most dramatic fashion possible. Melody rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help but laugh. He was like… a child? No, definitely not, but his playful manner reminded her of one. She might possibly be more disturbed if it wasn’t for being around Ren all the time, but this was nothing compared to other PR stunts in the past, and nothing compared to Ren’s flirty personality, for that matter. Melody had seen him lay it on _thick_ for Haruka in the last, leaving their composer utterly shell-shocked for a solid ten minutes afterwards.

“You ready to head back, then?” Melody asked, watching as Heavens made their way to a different area of the park, presumably another filming location.

“Actually, can we stay here a little longer? It’s nice out,” Haruka asked shyly.

“Only if we go find the waterfall that was on the park map when we first came in.” Melody felt a genuine smile creeping up on her. It was a beautiful day, and she was happy to spend it outdoors, despite the odd random run-in. But… oh, well. Apparently, running into random pop stars was part of her life now.


	4. In Which Texts Are Sent

If there was one thing she thought she wouldn’t ever be doing, it was working a desk job, but schedules had to be made and venues had to be booked, and it was _actually_ in her job description to do those things.

Desk work wasn’t the most exciting, but it at least kept her busy. Ringo and Ryuya didn’t even bring by any extra grading for her today, so by lunchtime she was on schedule to take a real break.

 **_Unknown Number:_ ** _Hey, cutie!_

Melody ignored it. Wrong number.

She finished her lunch and kept working on paperwork, contracts, and scheduling. Shining was an incredible businessman when it came to music and understanding public relations, but he wasn’t the best at fine details. Well, a more appropriate way to say it was that he preferred not to deal with the fine details himself. He was sharp as a tack and prided himself on his ironclad contracts and sense of business, but he disliked handling day-to-day minutiae in favor of focusing on the big picture.

Unfortunately, that left it to Melody to handle all the day-to-day minutiae, which she didn’t so much _mind_ as found a little mind _numbing_. It was almost a relief to do something mind numbing after the chaos of working multiple part time jobs, though. At the end of the day,

 **_Unknown Number:_ ** _Oh, this is Van from Heavens. I probably should have led with that._

 **_Unknown Number:_ ** _Ren gave me your number._

Melody waited a few minutes and tried to decide if it would be appropriate to respond. An idol was one thing, and she was hardly bothered by texting idols after three months of being around them so often, but an idol from a rival agency that… specifically asked for her number? In the end, curiosity won out and she texted back.

 **_Me:_ ** _Why did you want my number?_

 **_Van:_ ** _Well, I thought I would open by saying that I’m overjoyed you fell for me, but I didn’t get to catch you._

 **_Me:_ ** _… That is the absolute cheesiest line I’ve ever heard outside a romcom_

 **_Van:_ ** _I don’t say anything that isn’t true, I promise._

 **_Melody:_ ** _Can I help you with something?_

 **_Van:_ ** _A woman who’s right to the point. What would you say to going out with me sometime?_

The phone nearly fell from her hands. It was an absurd question to begin with, as Heavens certainly had the same rules about dating as Starish and Quartet Night. In other words: no relationships allowed.

 **_Melody:_ ** _I’d say idols can’t date and that’s a terrible, if flattering, suggestion._

 **_Van:_ ** _Idols can’t have relationships. We can go on dates, no problem! I do it all the time._

 **_Melody:_ ** _I know. I see it in the tabloids, where I would prefer not to end up._

 **_Melody:_ ** _Look, you seem nice, but I really can’t risk my job._

 **_Van:_ ** _Then what about somewhere casual? As friends?_

He really wouldn’t give up, would he?

 **_Melody:_ ** _… Can I get a reprieve if I say that I’ll think about it?_

 **_Van:_ ** _That’s all I ask <3_

Rolling her eyes, Melody shoved her phone in her pocket, shut down her desk computer, and gathered her things to head home. Well, the place that currently served as her home. She didn’t really consider living in the idol dorms near the agency to be one of the most desirable places to call home, but it was a nicer place than her old apartment by far, and at least it took her commute down to a walking distance.

The idol dorms were several stories tall, currently inhabited by Starish, Quartet Night, and several other of Shining Agencies’ currently contracted idols. Of course, some traveled and some had the option to live by themselves, but very few musicians would be so foolish as to give up free room and board that came equipped with easily accessible rehearsal space. Melody lived there for much the same reason: room and board plus easy job access.

As soon as she entered the building, Melody screeched to a halt so suddenly that her heels might have left scorch marks on the welcome mat.

Van and Ren sat in the lounge area just inside the front doors, laughing over a game of cards.

“What the— you were _here_?!” she spluttered, nearly tripping over her own feet. The boys looked up at her, apparently unsurprised to see her entering. Did they know what time she normally left work? Then again, Ren could probably make an educated guess, so maybe that wasn’t quite as creepy as it felt.

“There are no rules saying that idols can’t visit friends,” Van said, feigning offense. “Ren and I haven’t caught up in a while.”

“To be fair, he’s right.” Ren simply shrugged from where he lounged on the sofa, a catlike grin on his face.

“And you just _happened_ to ask for my number,” Melody deadpanned, hands on her hips.

“Just so happens.” Van shrugged, but the smile on his face was far from innocent. “So, have you thought about it?”

“Not long enough to come to a decision!” she huffed. Van rose from his seat on the sofa, shaking his head sadly.

“You’re breaking my heart, you know.”

“Look, I know you’re not used to being turned down, but I don’t think it’s the best—” Melody cut off with a squeak as Van suddenly snatched up her hand and kissed it softly.

“One night out. That’s all I’m asking. Doesn’t even have to be a date, really. Just go out with me and let’s have a good time.”

Those pleading eyes were absolutely merciless, leaving Melody pinned like a very, very red deer in the headlights, unable to speak for a moment or two.

“… Did _you_ put him up to this?” she asked, glancing over at Ren. Van still hadn’t released her hand, waiting patiently for an answer.

“No. Well. I may not have discouraged it, but it wasn’t my idea, I assure you,” he said with a soft laugh, tossing his long hair over his shoulder. “Van goes out on dates so often that the tabloids practically forget he exists now. There’s never a new scoop if never goes out with the same person twice.”

“Good lord.” Melody rubbed at her temples with her free hand, trying to think of a way out of this scenario. She really couldn’t. “Van, I can’t.”

“Ren just told you it isn’t really a risk. The tabloids are more after Eiichi and Kira these days, anyways.”

“It would look especially weird considering my job.” She tried to pull her hand back and failed. Van kept his hold tight, pulling her in closer. He gently tilted her chin up to look at him with his free hand, and Melody could swear she saw anime style sparkles around him. It should be illegal to look _that good_ while asking someone to do something that could possibly cause both of them a lot of trouble.

“It’ll be casual, I promise.”

Melody bit her lip, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment before she spoke.

“No fancy dinners, no alone time, and nothing that makes us look like we’re actually a couple,” she said firmly. When she opened her eyes, Van’s smile was positively blinding.

“Yesssssss!” He finally dropped his hold, punching the air once as he turned in a circle. His enthusiasm was so contagious that Melody couldn’t help but smile, though there was a nauseous feeling in her gut as she wondered what on earth she might have just gotten into.

Oh, well. Time would tell, and there was pasta upstairs calling her name.

“Sorry to run, but I really need to go make dinner,” she said sheepishly. _Reheat_ dinner was more like it.

“Okay— I’ll call you?” Van looked so hopeful that it was almost crushing.

“Okay.” Melody nodded once, forcing a small smile, before she made her way to the elevators.

Something was still bothering her about the whole situation, and it wasn’t just the paparazzi aspect. Why would Van, a top tier idol with tons of beautiful and famous women surrounding him on a regular basis, want to go out with her? She was a glorified _gopher_ in a lot of ways, for fuck’s sake. Her job wasn’t exactly glamorous, she didn’t have any incredible prospects, and there weren’t any stand out talents that he’d seen besides her ability to fall down stairs. Her first thought was that it might be easy to get company secrets from the person theoretically closest to Shining, but everyone knew that Shining held his cards close, and Ren trusted the guy. Melody might not know much about Van, but she trusted Ren enough not to encourage anyone he really thought had bad intentions.

So that left… boredom? Maybe he was just looking for a distraction. Melody didn’t plan on being his next broken heart, if that was what she wanted, but maybe it would be worth it for an evening. One night, one date, no photos in the tabloids, and then he’d be out of her hair and… maybe she’d have a new friend? He didn’t seem like a terrible person, he just had a big personality.

Enough dwelling on that, though. It was done and she couldn’t change it. The best thing to do now was to wait for a call so they could decide a location, and to focus on getting some food in her stomach.

Her stomach responded to that thought with a strangely well-timed gurgle.

“Yep, I know. It’s been a long day…” Melody sighed.

* * *

 **_Reiji:_ ** _Do you still have that book I’ve been meaning to borrow from you?_

 **_Me:_ ** _Oh, crap! I’ll bring it to rehearsal in the morning. Sorry!_

 **_Reiji:_ ** _Can I just come and pick it up? Camus says your room is on the top floor._

 **_Me:_ ** _Sure, if you want. I’m here._

Melody’s apartment was on the topmost floor of the professional dorms for Shining Agency members. While the lower rooms featured communal kitchens and laundry, the upper floors were full apartments with amenities. It was most likely that the original plan was to have teachers, mentors, or other staff members live there, but Shining’s job offer came with the option for full room and board with no reduction to her salary, so who was she to refuse? Granted, it meant living above a building full of idols, but that was alright. The building also included a gym, a pool, a dance studio, and music rooms… though she’d never chosen to use them. She didn’t really see the boys much, in any case, considering she had her own kitchen and washing machine, and mostly kept to herself. Something about being in the communal areas made her feel like she was invading their privacy.

Her room was a studio with a kitchen on one end and a bathroom and closet off to the side. The only furniture in the place was a small sofa, a low coffee table, and a bed, and the entire room was littered with boxes of all shapes and sizes. Despite the fact that the room was clean, Melody was far from unpacked, even months into her new living arrangement. There was one plate, cup, and set of silverware that she washed after she ate, and one or two pans that she used to cook, but the rest of the kitchen items were in a box.

The space dedicated as the living area felt overly large and empty. It was more than large enough to hold a dining room table, should she want one, but she had no reason to have one, and again, only boxes covered the floor. Most of them were full of books. A few had clothes and knickknacks. In truth, she simply couldn’t muster up the energy to care about unpacking. It was all just a different shade of exhausting at this point.

She did, however, put on tea for Reiji. If he was going to come up here, she might as well offer him something to drink. He’d see the ungodly mess, but… Well, she couldn’t just turn him out, and it would take her a minute to find the book he wanted, anyways.

While she waited for a knock at the door, Melody skimmed through boxes and moved others, looking for where she thought she’d packed everything. In the end, Reiji knocked in the middle of looking through the third box, and she was forced to stop her search, pour out the now boiling water, and add tea bags to the mugs.

“Hi,” she said shyly, opening the door. “Ah… you can come in if you want, but it’s a bit of a mess. Sorry.”

“Did you just change rooms?” Reiji asked, confused. He slowly stepped inside, footsteps echoing on the hard, wooden floorboards. It wouldn’t normally be off base to think that, but she couldn’t help but tense at his comment as she opened a box of books.

“Um… not exactly…” Melody blushed as she shuffled awkwardly through the box, doing her best to hide her face from her visitor. “I moved in when Shining offered me the job. Room and board was too nice a deal to pass up. You all were away at a shoot that day, so you missed the parade of boxes, and I don’t come down to use the communal kitchens much because I have a kitchen here, and I feel like the lounge area is kind of the space for you all, not me...” She trailed off, biting her lip to keep back the flood of excuses for why she’d mostly been holing up in her room.

“You haven’t even unpacked?”

She cringed at the note of sympathy in his voice. This was part of why she hadn’t wanted anyone to come to her room. Thankfully, the book she wanted was in that box, so she handed it to Reiji and decided to judiciously ignore his question.

“Have a seat, if you like,” Melody said, gesturing to the sofa. She turned her back and went to grab the mugs of tea, trying to think of how to answer his question without outright lying or sounding childish. Reiji’s brow furrowed in concern, but he perched on one side of the sofa and gratefully accepted the mug of tea she handed him.

“Are you really doing as well as you say you are?” Reiji didn’t look overly concerned as he drank his tea, but he certainly could tell that something was wrong. After all, anyone who saw this place would be able to tell that something was out of the ordinary.

“I mean, I’m not unhappy here. I think it’s helping, really. It’s just…”

“Not home,” Reiji said with an understanding smile. Melody gave a disdainful huff, but she nodded her agreement.

“I don’t think I know what home is any more. I’ve moved at least once a year for the last eight years, so I guess I just don’t see the point in unpacking things by now. It just makes it harder to take everything down when you have to leave again. Besides, I heard that Shining’s assistants never last long.”

“You know that he likes you, don’t you?”

Melody blinked, surprised.

“I can’t _ever_ tell what Shining is thinking.”

“Neither can I, but Ringo is the best interpreter on hand, and they said that he likes your initiative. You’re also the first assistant who ever really tried to get to know us. You make sure

“Yeah, well… I know it’s draining, even when it’s a fun job to do, and idols don’t tend to take care of themselves very well a lot of the time. Also, anyone who knows Shining knows that he uses way too many special effects to have time to acquire all those permits or do all the scheduling, and Ringo and Ryuya are too busy grading to handle that.” She took a long sip of tea from her mug, trying to calm her nerves. Hm, maybe it was time to get more sugar the next time she went to the store. Then again, it wasn’t like she’d have company over very often.

“Did you learn all that at Saotome Academy?”

Melody choked on her tea.

“How— how did you—?" She coughed and spluttered for a moment while Reiji rubbed her back gently. She’d specifically _not_ mentioned her time at Saotome Academy to any of the boys. After all, she’d done her best to stay out of the way while she was a student, and they had no reason to remember her. What could be worse than admitting to a group of successful idols that you were a failed idol turned coffee runner?

“I know you never met me before this, and Camus was recruited without ever attending Saotome Academy, but Ran-Ran remembered you.”

“He didn’t go here, either!” Melody protested.

“No, but he recognized your face from one of your student performances. Shining took him on a tour when they signed him on.” Reiji smiled brightly, but Melody just buried her head in her hands.

“Why the hell would he remember _me,_ of all people?” Her voice was muffled through her fingers.

“You’ll have to ask him,” he said with a laugh. “In any case, we found you online! It did take some digging, though, Miss Amethyst.” Reiji punctuated his sentence with a wink and Melody felt a blush spread from her cheeks all the way down to her toes.

This was it. This was where she died from sheer mortification. Her gravestone would read “Here lies Melody. Wanted to be an ostrich. Is now permanently in the sand.” Her stage name wasn’t her choice, and neither was the style of music she sang. In any case, the spark of passion that she had died long before her songs were released, squashed out by too many composers who didn’t work well with her style and too many exhausting schedules.

“I’m just saying that might be why you get along with him so well. You know what he’s like,” he said kindly, patting her shoulder. That only served to ease her embarrassment by a fraction, but Reiji must have sensed it, because he quickly changed the subject. “So… How would you redecorate if you stayed?”

“Reiji…” Melody groaned, flopping back on the sofa.

“Humor me. Please?”

Ugh, that look was just like a puppy. His big, brown eyes and floppy hair and pleading frown went right to her heart every time, from resolving arguments between the Quartet Night members to asking for her to pick up a pastry he loved from across town. She couldn’t ignore it.

“Well… I kind of hate the color of the walls. It makes my eyes water. That, and it makes me think of that story about the woman who just stares at the wallpaper and sees things.” She frowned at the bright yellow walls, and something in her expression must have been funny, because Reiji burst out laughing.

“What would you want instead?” he asked through his giggles.

“I don’t know. I like pink, but bright pink is too bright for a wall. I’d be blinded even worse than the yellow,” she said, laughing. “Probably white. It would make the room nice and bright, and… some curtains for the balcony doors might be nice instead of those weird blinds.”

“How about an accent wall? Over there?” Reiji stretched his arms out in front of him like he was framing a photo, looking through a square outlined by his thumb and index fingers with one eye closed.

“That could be nice,” she agreed. “Maybe a gallery wall with photos. I have a lot of them somewhere in here.” She gestured vaguely to the torrent of boxes around the room. The photos were… she wasn’t even sure where anymore.

“I think this place has more potential than you give it credit for.” Reiji smiled, looking around the room in a way that made Melody feel as though he could see something that she could not. What was it about glaringly bright, blank yellow walls that inspired him?

“I don’t know. Sometimes I even wonder if it’s worth it to settle in.” Melody finished off her tea and sat the empty mug on the coffee table with a dull clunk.

“I think it is. We all want you to stay as long as you want.”

A funny kind of warmth settled in her chest at the thought that, for the first time in a long time, she seemed to have friends where she lived. At least for now. There really was no telling how long this might last, no matter what Reiji said. Though she still didn’t quite have the heart to settle into this place as a home, it was nice to know that for the time being, she had somewhere to stay while she sorted things out.


	5. In Which Melody Loses A Book

Melody did not know why Shining insisted on sending her out to seemingly random locations to gather seemingly random information or do seemingly random tasks at least once a week. Last month he asked her to go to a park and record six different types of bird calls. At least she’d gotten some good sketching in that day. Once, he’d directed her to go visit Natsuki on the set of a commercial he was filming and to simply observe. Take notes. See what she could see. Did he ever ask for those notes? Not once.

Today, at least, she had a real task aside from getting herself to the other side of the city to visit a photo shoot. Ringo had accidentally left behind a crucial piece of paperwork on their desk, and Melody was on her way to go deliver it to the Joker Trap photoshoot. Coincidentally, the paperwork didn’t even truly belong to Ringo; it was the permit for the pyrotechnics that Melody filled out two weeks earlier. Why Shining insisted on having fire at nearly everything, Melody would never understand, but it wasn’t her job to understand. She just got the permits in order.

Getting in was easy enough after she flashed her credentials, and luckily enough Ringo was on break when she arrived.

“Melody! Thank you for bringing that out,” Ringo said, relieved.

“No problem,” Melody said with a small smile, fishing around in her messenger bag. It had to be in here somewhere, but she kept too many papers and file folders in here for her own good. She pulled out a stack of three folders and her sketchbook as she fumbled inside the bag, sitting them on a nearby table while she looked. “Ah-ha! I knew it was in here. I should seriously reorganize…”

Melody handed over the paper to Ringo, who didn’t seem at all troubled. “Oh, it’s no bother. I’m just glad it’s here now. You should go and say hello to the boys while you’re here. They’re shooting solo sets now, so the ones not on camera are free to chat. We’ll get set up for the fire in the group photoshoot.”

Before Melody could ask why they were dealing with any kind of fire in a photoshoot, Ringo was gone again. She heaved a sigh, absentmindedly tucked her things back into her bag, and wandered over to the photoshoot area. Camus was up in front of the camera, looking as oddly sparkling as usual, though Tokiya was the only one around. Presumably Ren and Ranmaru had found other things to do while they waited on their slots.

She’d no sooner walked up next to Tokiya than she heard his stomach grumble.

“Did you forget lunch again?” Melody hissed, not even turning her head to look at Tokiya. She knew he could hear her, and she wasn’t about to attract attention by berating him on set, so she kept her eyes on the shoot as they conversed.

“I was busy.”

“You had a scheduled fucking lunch break, you bitch. And I should know— _I made the schedule_!”

“And I was busy for it.” As usual, Tokiya was utterly unphased by her strong language. Around the first time she’d cursed in front of Starish, there had been a few shocked stares. Now… Well, some of them weren’t fond of it, so she held her tongue in front of them, but Tokiya was practically desensitized.

“You’re going to send me to an early grave, you idiotic dancing coconut,” she muttered. That caught his attention.

“Coconut?” He raised an eyebrow, looking somewhere between amused and offended.

“Yeah, well, the normal insults don’t work anymore. I have to start being creative.” She rolled her eyes and fished in her messenger bag, unearthing a bag of cheese crackers that she pressed into Tokiya’s hands. “Eat this while they’re working on the solo photos for the other guys.”

Tokiya took the crackers from her with a sigh. “Have _you_ eaten today?”

“I—” Melody paused, blinking. Had she? “… Shit.”

“You’re worse than I am,” Tokiya said, rolling his eyes. “I’ll eat these if you’ll go get food after you leave here. You didn’t even have breakfast, did you?”

“… I hate you a little bit.” Melody crossed her arms over her chest as she grumbled. “Instead of putting money in the swear jar, we need to put money in the missed lunch jar.”

Tokiya gave a snorting laugh. “What would we do with it?”

“Take ourselves to lunch?” Melody shrugged. It seemed appropriate.

“Fine, but you’re starting out with double debt since you missed breakfast.”

“Wait, we’re actually doing this?” Melody blinked, finally turning to look at him.

“I don’t see why not. It might encourage us to eat more regularly since we’re both workaholics.”

“I am not a—”

Tokiya glared.

“Fine, I’ll put some cash in the newly established missed meal jar tonight.”

Heaving a resigned sigh, Melody watched the photoshoot in silence for a minute or two longer before she determined that the photographer loved Camus and there wouldn’t be enough time to speak to him. Besides, now that Tokiya had pointed out her missed meals, she was feeling rather hungry, and she couldn’t get food while staying here.

She nearly crashed into Ren and Ranmaru in the hallway on her way out of the building. They weren’t there before, and Melody absolutely knew it, but there they were, water bottles in hand and talking quietly.

“Hello, Lady. What brings you here?” Ren asked with a wave.

“Dropping off paperwork. Again. Did Shining’s other assistants run around this much for him?”

“Shining’s other assistants couldn’t keep up with how much paperwork he needed done in the first place,” Ranmaru said, shrugging.

“I’m beginning to think he only sends you on so many errands to see when you’ll slip.” Ren frowned slightly. “You handle it well, darling, but it seems a little extreme some days.”

“He texts, I respond,” Melody said helplessly. “It’s mostly just bad when he’s out of town, and that’s just been really often recently. It should slow down in a week or two.”

“For someone who’s job title is his personal assistant, you don’t seem to talk to him in person much.” Ranmaru raised an eyebrow as he took a long sip from his water bottle.

“Most of his communications come via email or text. He’s always running off to who knows where, and I mostly just manage the paperwork for everything. Fine tune schedules. Book reservations. Shining says he wants something and I make it happen.” Melody shrugged. As chaotic as her work could be, and as much as she’d struggled during the first few weeks, it turned out that if you dropped that a reservation or inquiry was from Shining Agencies, things tended to be done for you _very_ quickly.

“No wonder everyone thinks you’re our manager. You spend almost as much time with us as at your desk,” he scoffed, though Melody could tell he was amused. However, she froze as his statement took hold.

“Wait. People think I’m Quartet Night’s manager, too? Do they not know how the structure of Shining’s company _works_?” Melody slapped her hand against her forehead, shaking her head. Shining was the manager of all his groups. He didn’t have managers that worked underneath him. It made her job a little messy trying to balance everything, especially with the solo idols, but that was how he liked it. He was a vet hands-on producer, and it worked for him.

“Most casual fans tend to neglect learning the studio policies of their favorite idols’ employers. It’s a real problem,” Ranmaru deadpanned. Melody elbowed him in the side.

“You’re such an ass.” She laughed, rolling her eyes. Ranmaru grumbled something unintelligible.

“You’re the only one who could get away with telling him that to his face, though,” Ren said, laughing joyfully.

“It’s because he knows I don’t mean it.” She shrugged. “Alright, I’m off to get lunch before Tokiya takes my head off. See you guys later!”

She waved her goodbyes as she took off down the hall.

* * *

After the shoot ended, Tokiya took one last look around the room, double checking that they had gathered all their items before leaving the studio. Everything looked clear— ah. Everything except for one table.

There was a black sketchbook left on one of the side tables, its cover worn and the corners frayed. The spine was patched with three different kinds of duct tape, sporting polka dot, floral, and striped prints in varying bright colors. The pages themselves were warped, sticky notes and tabs jutting out from the edges in a strange collage. He opened the front cover to check for a name, but there wasn’t one. Instead, he found a colorful array of… something.

It wasn’t entirely a sketchbook, because the first page was filled with hand drawn staff paper. A composition for piano and voice, though the vocal line had no lyrics. Watercolor stains dotted the page in shades of blue and green. The back of the page had sketches of stage outfits, small versions of pattern pieces drawn out for a long, flared jacket. The next page was a scenery sketch done in crayon and ink.

Tokiya casually flipped forward through two or three more pages, but it felt a little invasive to go further. The book was obviously two-thirds full, which was easy to tell by looking at the binding. The owner would want it back. Since there was sheet music inside, the his first thought was…

“Haruka?” he called, closing the book.

“Yes?” A soft reply came from around the corner, and Haruka came bounding into the room. She’d been hiding out in various places around the studio that day, trying to work on a new song for the quartet, but he hadn’t seen much of her.

“Is this yours?” Tokiya held up the battered black sketchbook, but the composer shook her head.

“No, I haven’t seen it before. Where was it?”

“On the table…” Tokiya frowned. It had to belong to someone from the photoshoot. The entire place was empty this morning, so who could have left it? Maybe one of the crew members left it behind during a break, or perhaps it belonged to Ringo? “I’ll check with the crew before we leave. There’s no name inside, but it might belong to someone.”

“Okay,” Haruka said with a smile. “Do… um, would you like to have dinner later? After the shoot?” She was blushing a little, eyes wide and expectant.

“The quartet has dinner reservations. You’re welcome to join us.” Tokiya smiled softly and tucked the book under his arm.

“Oh. Alright, yes!” Haruka clapped her hands together joyfully, her bob haircut bouncing a little. It was amazing how her moods could swing from awkward to enthusiastic so quickly, and he often wondered how she viewed the world in so many and so few colors all at once.

Enough of that, though. He needed to get to dinner and get back to the dorms. There were things he needed to do tonight.

* * *

Melody wanted to scream when she made her way back to the dorms, weighed down with packages. After leaving the shoot, she’d suddenly been assaulted with a massive amount of texts and emails, all from different members of Starish and Quartet Night, all asking her to get things from around the city. In one case, even _Ryuya_ called her! She did manage to stop for lunch and grab something for dinner, but by the time she came back to the studio, it was dark and she was ready to drop into bed.

“Okay, I give up! Joke’s over! I’m Shining’s assistant, not your damn gopher! You’re all just lucky I didn’t have much to do today so I could run around for you,” she called, but no one answered. Her voice echoed around the empty commons area of the dorms.

Interesting.

Starish and Quartet Night were the only regular idol dorm inhabitants, at least in this building, and normally one or two of them were downstairs at this time of night. However, everything was empty. Instead of calling out futilely, she decided to unload her packages quite unceremoniously on the large work table (why Camus needed 32 cans of condensed milk, she’d never know, but they were _heavy_ ) and plod up to her room. All she wanted was a shower and sleep.

When she arrived at her door, though, she found it open. Odd. Maybe there was maintenance that needed to be done? No one should have building access except for residents with key cards, so maintenance was the only logical explanation.

“Hello? Is someone in… here…?”

Her apartment looked like a different world.

The once yellow walls were now pristine white, with the exception of one long, pink accent wall. Black and white frames full of photos, old canvases with her artwork, and even a hanging plant adorned the pink wall in a bright, mismatched art gallery. Instead of a battered sofa that was in storage upstairs when she arrived, there was a new black couch and a matching armchair in the middle of the living area, complete with a floral pattered rug and a black coffee table.

Where there were once blank walls in the kitchen, a hanging cabinet now held her collection of mugs and tea, aprons and oven mitts dangling from the hooks at the bottom. There was a small, rolling island in the middle of what was once a blank space, as well as a dining table with a bouquet of flowers in the center.

Her bed was tucked in a corner, a tall cube bookshelf as wide as the footboard separating it from the rest of the room, though Melody wasn’t entirely certain it was even the same bed as before. It looked like most of her books fit on the shelf, and the ones that couldn’t were on wall shelves opposite the gallery wall. The balcony doors at the far side of the room, on the opposite side from the bed, were free of their 1970s blinds and now covered by long, pink curtains. Even the desk was set up near the balcony doors, where she could work in the sunlight, a corkboard and a whiteboard calendar hung over it.

And, in the middle of it all, the members of Starish and Quartet Night stood, looking as though they’d been caught red-handed. Tokiya held a book in his hands, midway through putting it on a shelf while Masato and Ren hung pictures on the wall. Reiji and Ai held mugs in their hands, staring over at her from the kitchen. Camus was the only one who managed to still look elegant and only mildly surprised instead of outright shocked, but that was just how he lived his life.

“Surprise!” Natsuki cried, throwing his hands in the air.

“You’re early!” Reiji looked shocked as he checked his watch. “We thought it would take another hour at least.”

“I told you that wasn’t enough to deter anyone who can keep up with the Producer,” Camus said, tutting quietly. Melody just stood, stunned. If she had anything in her hands, she would have dropped it.

“… _This_ is why you sent me out on a wild goose chase all over the city?” She could barely voice the words, eyes already filling with tears.

“Well, we thought about sending someone on distraction duty, but that might have felt suspicious, and we all wanted to help,” Reiji admitted. The other boys nodded their agreement.

Melody outright wailed like a child, unable to stop the sobs bubbling in her throat. Reiji panicked, eyes going wide.

“Wait, is something wrong? We can change—”

“It’s just so _nice_ of you!” she blubbered, wiping at her eyes. A handkerchief suddenly appeared in front of her, and she realized it was from Masato, who offered a sympathetic smile in her direction. Melody took the cloth gratefully and dabbed at her tears, but couldn’t stop them falling. “Th— thank you— thank you all s— so much.”

“Reiji organized it,” Ren said proudly, wrapping an arm around his friend’s shoulders. “We weren’t quite finished setting up everything, as you see, but we did make an effort.”

“It sucks not to have a place that feels like home, so we wanted to do our best to make you feel welcome,” Syo said, putting down the empty box in his hand.

Melody, much to her chagrin, couldn’t speak for crying. She ran over to Reiji and threw her arms around him, still sobbing. He gently hugged her back, patting her back to try and soothe her. A moment later, she felt another pair of arms wrap around them both, realizing that Natsuki had joined them.

“Come on, bring it in,” he said cheerfully, beckoning in the others. Cecil was, unsurprisingly, the first taker on a group hug, quickly followed by Ren, who dragged Masato behind him. Even Syo relented, though Camus, Ranmaru, and Tokiya elected to stay on the sidelines. That was fine. Melody could hug them later, once she was released from an admittedly suffocating group hug, but that was okay with her. Slight suffocation by your friends was nothing when it came to feeling like you had a home again.

“I don’t know how to thank you,” she choked out, voice a little muffled in the scuffle, even as they finally freed her so she could move around. Still wiping at her eyes, Melody looked around the room, unable to fathom that they would go to such lengths just for her.

“You always take care of us. We wanted to do something to take care of you,” Tokiya said casually. “You don’t have to do what you do for us on top of your job, but you do.”

“Your mothering is insufferable, if appreciated,” Camus conceded with a sigh.

“Says the guy who sent me for thirty-two cans of evaporated milk!” Melody said with a manic laugh. “What the hell are you going to do with all those, anyways?”

“Give himself cavities, probably,” Ranmaru scoffed. Giggles resounded around the room.

That was when the realization hit her: Home isn’t just a place. Home is _people_. They gave her more of a home than she’d had in years just by being there for her. Her family was helpful, but she couldn’t help but feel like she’d failed them while she was home. Here… here she had a fresh start. New people. New job. New life. It was more than she could ever ask for, and a chance to dig herself out of a hellhole she didn’t think she’d ever escape.

“We’re sorry if we arranged things in a way you don’t like them, but we can always help you move them around later,” Cecil said softly. “We didn’t touch any of the boxes with your clothes, by the way. We thought it might be a little invasive.”

“Everything looks amazing. Really.” Melody was entirely honest. It looked perfect, and she could tell where the boys had put their individual touches on the place. Masato obviously organized the gallery wall, but it looked like Cecil or Natsuki had added framed, goofy pictures of Quartet Night and Starish among the photos of her family and friends. The flowers on the kitchen counter looked like something Ren would deliver, and there was a tea set on the coffee table that she certainly didn’t remember owning. As cold as he could be sometimes, Camus had certainly thought of that.

“I really can’t thank you enough.”

“Apologies for the chase around the city,” Ai said softly. “We won’t let the items you picked up go to waste.”

“How about you just make sure my receipts get reimbursed and we call it even?” Melody laughed, her weariness over the day nearly forgotten. Her feet still hurt and her eyes burned from tears, but her heart was full, and she certainly felt like she would sleep well tonight.

Tomorrow was a new day, and tomorrow she’d wake up… here. And the next day. And for the foreseeable future. How strange to have a place that she looked at and realized, oddly, that she didn’t need to think about repacking, or storage space, or sealing holes in the walls. No repainting, no cleaning fees, no nothing. She would be… here.

Just _here_.

How truly wonderful.


	6. In Which Hot Dogs are Had (Again)

Masato couldn’t sleep.

He tiptoed downstairs, avoiding looking at his unfortunately unclothed and sleeping roommate as he exited, thinking that a walk might clear his head. Perhaps he would go downstairs and play the piano. Some late-night Beethoven was always good for the soul. Clad in pajamas, a robe, and slippers, Masato took the elevator down to the basement, where the rehearsal studios were, and made to walk towards the practice rooms. However, all was not silent when he came to the far side of the building.

The sound of a pounding bass beat came from down the hall. As he walked closer, the beat transformed into an actual song, and the sound was clearly coming from the farthest dance rehearsal space. Odd. Who would be down here at this time of night? Curiosity got the better of him, and he wandered down the twists and turns of the labyrinth of studios until he came to the studio that the music came from. The song was clearly audible now, if quiet, which meant the volume in the studio must have been quite loud. He liked the sound, though. It was a good arrangement, a softer rock sound with some pop influences.

Two-way mirrors lined the front of the rehearsal space, allowing anyone in the hallway to see inside without distracting the performers rehearsing. Surprisingly, staring through the mirrors from where he learned against the opposite wall, was Masato’s idol mentor.

“You couldn’t sleep, either?” Ranmaru asked, though he didn’t look away from the two-way mirrors.

“No…” Masato murmured, moving to stand beside him. Who was he watching? No, more importantly, who was down here practicing at this time of night? It was just past midnight, and no one normally used the rehearsal space at this hour.

He almost didn’t recognize the figure turning and leaping through the studio, dancing out a strange combination of ballet and contemporary to a modern rock song that was both unexpected and beautiful. She wore a black, backless leotard and green leggings, dancing in sock feet through the studio. Her dark hair was pinned up instead of flowing in long curls, but he knew her.

What was Melody doing in a dance studio?

As he watched, she took two quick steps forward and slipped as she attempted to jump, socks sliding on the worn floor. A sickening thud punctuated her fall, her expression twisting in pain. Masato’s first instinct was to reach for the door, to rush and help her, but Ranmaru held him back.

“Don’t. Watch what she does.” He nodded towards the two-way mirrors. Inside the studio, Melody pulled herself back up, rubbing her hip where she’d hit the floor. She took a breath, walked to the sound setup, and rewound the song like there was nothing wrong, though he saw her scrub tears from her eyes.

This time, she landed her jump, if a little shakily. Sock feet weren’t exactly appropriate for dance, but sneakers wouldn’t work for that kind of contemporary style. It might have been all she had to work with.

“She looks like…” Masato murmured, brow furrowing. Ranmaru remained silent, obviously waiting on him to draw his own conclusions. “Was she an idol?”

“In a different life, I think.” Ranmaru remained eerily still. Melody, oblivious to their presence, kept up her dance until the song ended, breathing hard. As the final notes faded into silence, she slowly relaxed, flopping onto her back on the floor. He wondered briefly how long she’d been down here, wondered where she got the routine. It was good. She was graceful. Confident.

“What happened?” Why would someone with so much talent— so much hard-won _skill_ — quit a performing career to become a personal assistant? She obviously still had passion for it, if she was down here at this time of night, so why not perform?

“No idea, and I’m not about to ask her.” Ranmaru finally looked away from the windows, glancing towards Masato. He’d removed his colored contact for the evening, and it was always a little strange seeing him without it.

“What brings you down here?”

“Couldn’t sleep either, and I like her music.” Ranmaru threw a glance back at Melody, who had finally peeled herself off the floor and gotten some water. “She’s pretty good. Out of practice, though.”

For Ranmaru, “pretty good” was a high compliment, and Masato could tell he meant it more as a compliment to her attitude more than her skill. It was easy to remedy being out of practice, but not so easy to change a state of mind. Melody was determined. Stubborn. That was easy enough to see from her work ethic. She entered everything with a kind of bullheaded perfectionism, but not the mindset that she needed to do it right the first time— the mindset that she would do it again and again until she couldn’t possibly get it _wrong_.

“I wonder if she’d want to rehearse with us sometime…” Masato mused.

“Maybe think about why she’s down here past midnight rehearsing instead of during the day before you ask her,” Ranmaru said quietly. “Look, if you can get the story out of her, more power to you, but I don’t think she’s ready to share.”

His mentor walked away without another word.

He could understand why Ranmaru had been drawn into watching her dancing. She moved with a kind of grace that she seemed to lack while walking, danger prone as she was on any given day. Lost in the music and oblivious to his presence, it felt both invasive and intoxicating to watch her throw herself into a performance. That was the kind of performing presence an idol aspired to have. If you could draw the audience into your world, you could communicate your heart to them.

The only issue was that Melody wasn’t currently aware that she _had_ an audience. It wasn’t the same as performing for a crowd, or even being in front of a camera, and that realization made him feel oddly wrong about watching her for any longer. Instead, he made his way down the hall to the piano practice rooms.

He played from memory rather than with sheet music, since he hadn’t bothered to bring any with him. Familiar pieces were like family members to him, their tunes as comforting and soothing as the presence of any loved one. He lost himself in the music, fingers flying over the ivory keys, until he noticed a shadow passed over the keyboard. Masato stopped playing and looked up, finding exactly the face he’d expected to see.

Melody was peeking in the open door to the practice room. She had a large sweater tucked around her shoulders, and her hair fell loose around her shoulders. If it weren’t for the slight flush to her cheeks and the subtle sheen of sweat on her skin, he might have mistaken her for wearing casual clothes and taking a late night walk, just as he’d intended to do.

“You okay?” she asked, eyebrows raised.

“Couldn’t sleep.”

“Me either.” Melody rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly.

“Do you come down here often at night?” He had enough presence of mind not to mention that he saw her dancing, but he did wonder if she spent much time down here. Perhaps he could come watch again… or would that be strange? Likely so. She seemed like she would be fun to dance with sometime, though.

“Not really. It’s kind of peaceful, though. Maybe I should do it more.” She yawned, covering her mouth with the sleeve of her baggy sweater. “Sorry. I’m going to head to bed— don’t stay up too late. Sleep is important.”

“Yes,” Masato agreed. He watched her until her shadow disappeared down the hall.

* * *

“One hot dog with everything on it, as the lady requested.”

“Thank you very much, good sir,” Melody said with a laugh, taking her hot dog from Van.

Surprisingly, this date-not-date hadn’t been as painful as expected. He told her to dress casually for some kind of outdoor activity, so she showed up in jean shorts and a t-shirt, half expecting some kind of romantic picnic even though she’d specifically asked for something that wouldn’t put them in the tabloids... but no.

They were at a minor league baseball game.

Van showed up with two baseball caps in hand and two tickets for some admittedly fantastic seats in the baseball stadium, which was fine with Melody.

“What did I miss?” he asked, plopping down in the seat beside her. Besides the hot dogs, he had a tray full of popcorn, candy, and a couple of drinks. Bless him, he’d gone overboard.

“Not much. The ump keeps calling high balls strikes and one batter walked. No runs in this inning yet.”

“Bases loaded, though! We’ve got a shot.” Van cheered as he made short work of his own food, reminding Melody to focus on eating her hot dog before she made a mess everywhere by accident. Grace was not on her side when she wasn’t dancing. Just the thought of dancing made her ache a little, though, physically more than mentally.

Melody shifted a little in her seat, surreptitiously adjusting to accommodate the massive bruise on her hip. It had been a few days since she’d taken that fall, and the skin had gone from dark purple to a sickening shade of green. Maybe going down to use the dance studios had been a bad idea, or maybe she was just out of practice. It was the first time she’d really danced in over a year, but it felt freeing despite the bruise. It would be good for her to keep it up, to build back some of her strength. She didn’t want to use the studios during the day, though. Some of the idols might need them, and she didn’t want to raise any questions. It wasn’t exactly her top priority to talk to successful idols about her failed idol career. She just wanted to dance again because… Well, just for _her_. Because it made her feel whole.

After successfully finishing her hot dog without spilling everything down herself or on her lap, Melody tossed the remains in a trash can and settled in to watch the game. She could worry about her personal troubles later, including finding her sketchbook, which she seemed to have misplaced somewhere…

“Nonono— ugh!” She groaned, shaking her head. “That guy keeps _golfing_ every time he’s up to bat! I get liking low balls, but even if he hits one of those out of the strike zone, they’re just gonna catch him out and then throw out the guy on third.”

“I don’t know, the guy on first seems more likely.”

“He’s been trying to steal home. Look at him. He’s twitchy.”

“You know, I wouldn’t have pegged you for someone who likes sports, either,” Van said, though his eyes were still on the field. “You keep surprising me.”

“I don’t like them, in general. I just like baseball. I played ball as a kid, and I used to go to games with my mom sometimes.”

The batter struck out, but the next batter up to the plate did the same thing. The pitches were low, but this time he actually clipped one of the balls, hitting it high into the air off into the foul zone.

“I _knew_ it— Whoa, heads up!” Melody called, watching the foul ball come careening over the top of the safety nets and into their general direction.

“I got it!”

Van didn’t have a glove with him, but he immediately took off his baseball cap, turned it over, and snatched the ball out of the air in one sweeping motion. Melody stared, mouth open and eyes wide, before she finally started laughing. It was impressive and a little surreal, and Van looked like a cat who got the cream.

“Nice catch!” She held up her hand for a high five, which Van joyfully reciprocated. It turned out that he really was a nice guy, just like Ren said. He liked to laugh and he talked about his sisters almost nonstop. She thought that going out with him would be nothing but stressful but he was a real gentleman in a different way than expected. Instead of turning on the charm, he did his best to make her feel comfortable and casual, and by the time they walked out of the stadium she felt relaxed. It was a little surprising that they hadn’t been bombarded with fans or the press, but maybe the hats and sunglasses did at least a little to obscure Van’s identity.

“Here. Souvenir,” he said, gently tossing the ball he caught in her direction. She fumbled, but managed to catch it.

“Don’t you want it?” Melody asked.

“Nah, I’ve got several. What I _do_ want is a picture.” He reached out and suddenly put an arm around her shoulders, pulling her in close. She squeaked in surprise, but smiled when he held his phone up and took a selfie.

“Ah. As I thought— _you_ are adorable.” Van smiled brightly as he tucked his phone back in his pocket. Melody rolled her eyes. They still had a short ways to walk back to the car, but for now she was just enjoying herself, not so subtle flirting and all. Maybe that was just his personality, though, sort of like Ren. It was easier to let things like this roll off her after being around that particular member of Starish for a few months.

As they walked, a drop of rain hit Melody’s forehead. Another hit her hand. Another slid down her cheek to plop on the fabric of her dark t-shirt.

“Hey… what—” Melody cut off as rain suddenly began to pour from the sky. “Shit!”

“Run!” Van grabbed her hand and pulled her along, laughing as the sudden summer rain shower continued to soak everything and everyone even remotely in the vicinity. Melody couldn’t help but laugh along with him as they dodged passerby on the streets, running along towards the parking deck near the baseball stadium. The water was almost lukewarm, a welcome relief from the sweltering summer sun, and she almost didn’t mind the feeling of it running down her skin or the warmth of Van’s hand in hers.

By the time they made it to Van’s car, they were both entirely soaked and shivering a little. The weather was warm, but there was only so warm you could be while soaking wet from head to toe. He fished a spare jacket out of the back seat and wrapped it around Melody’s shoulders.

“Thank you.” The extra warmth did help, but she wasn’t only thanking him for the jacket. “I had a lot of fun today.”

“Enough fun to go out again?” Van asked hopefully. Ah, yes, he looked exactly like an excited puppy.

“How about we put a hold on that one? I don’t want to attract the paparazzi, but I’m glad to have a friend around.” Melody smiled, though Van was pouting from the driver’s seat.

“ _Friend_ ,” he said with a dramatic sigh. “I’ll win you over yet. I hope.”

Melody just rolled her eyes. She still wasn’t sure if she was a challenge or a heartbreak or a casual date waiting to happen for him, but it was fun being together at the ballpark. He reminded her of some of her symphony friends, and some of her musician friends from better days. Open, honest, and joyful. If he could get past this date thing, perhaps they could really get to know each other and become good friends. She wouldn’t mind that at all.

* * *

Two days later, Melody tucked her sweater a little closer around her as she worked on the latest set of schedules for Starish and Quartet Night, thinking that it was just a bit chilly in the office today. There wasn’t anything too crazy on the list of upcoming events, but coordinating travel for a beach photoshoot to help promote their summer albums certainly involved a bit of juggling.

As she worked, Ryuya came by her office, tapping twice on the already open door to announce his presence before entering.

“Hey, Mels, guess what turned up in the tabloids today.”

Oh, no. That was never a good way to start her day. It normally meant having to do some kind of damage control on her end. At best, it was making some calls and sending some anonymous tips. At worst, they’d have to schedule a press conference, but it had been a while since any of Shining’s idols fucked up quite that badly.

Unfortunately, it looked like she might soon be adding her own name to that list. Melody gasped, hand clapped over her mouth, as she looked at the picture on the front page.

“This is great PR, actually,” Ryuya said with a laugh. “Shining loved it.”

At the front of the tabloids was a perfect shot of Melody and Van at the baseball game, taken right at the moment when they high-fived, the fly ball in Van’s free hand. They were both laughing, and best of all? The headline read “ _Van Kiryuin catches a fly ball at a baseball game with a friend_.”

“Thank the good Lord above,” Melody said with a sigh, leaning heavily on her desk.

“It shows good relationships between the studios to have something like this out there. Looks like at least one tabloid writer has paid attention when we released press statements.”

“Yeah, which is good, because I’m tired of calling them to do damage control.” Melody rolled her eyes and skimmed over the article. The writer had, of course, hinted that it _could_ be more than a friendly relationship, but that was what tabloid writers always did. The picture also worked in her favor, as they weren’t in a particularly romantic situation like Van’s other dates that she’d seen plastered across news stands and internet pages. Holding hot dogs and wearing baseball jerseys didn't exactly scream out the same kind of relationship as picture of a table for two at an upscale restaurant. 

“Hey, Ryuya, does it feel cold in here to you?” she asked, turning back to her computer.

“No… but you do look a little flushed. Are you feeling okay?” Ryuya asked, leaning in closer.

“I’m fine, just a little dizzy, I think?” Melody blinked, trying to clear the fog from her thoughts as she stood. She had a spare jacket on the coat rack that she could wear for a while. “Anyways, I need to… oh…”

She crashed sideways into the wall as she attempted to step out from behind her desk, vision going dark.

“Melody? Can you hear me?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine…” she mumbled as her vision returned.

“I don’t think you are,” Ryuya began, but she didn’t hear the rest of his sentence. Overcome with dizziness as she tried to take another step forwards, Melody passed out cold in her office, unconscious before she even fell.


	7. In Which Tokiya Plays Detective

Okay, so as cute and fun as getting caught in the rain on a date might seem, Melody swore up and down that she’d never do it again. Apparently, coming back wet and cold was the last straw for her already overtaxed immune system, and her body just decided that it was time to retaliate.

She’d been in bed for two days now, mostly sleeping, mostly running a fever. When she was conscious, she opened her laptop and tried to complete as much work as possible, but sleep inevitably returned to claim her. Sometime on the morning of the second day, her fever finally broke, and she sat up in bed working on logistics for the upcoming photoshoots. Propped up against pillows, tucked under blankets, and equipped with several boxes of tissues, Melody lost track of time for an hour or so until she heard a knock at the door.

“Come on in, it’s open!” she called. It was odd living in a building where you could simply leave your apartment door unlatched without fear, but key card access to the idol dorms prevented anyone who didn’t live there (or wasn’t Shining) from entering the building. It could also be Ringo or Ryuya dropping off paperwork for her, though they’d insisted that she needed to rest.

“Good afternoon.” To her surprise, Tokiya opened the door, a pottery crock with a lid in his hands and messenger bag slung over his shoulder. He was scheduled to spend time around the dorms, studio, and the agency buildings today, if she remembered correctly, rehearsing in the morning with some personal time to work on lyrics and choreography in the afternoon.

“You probably shouldn’t be in here. I don’t want you to get sick,” Melody said, already feeling her eyelids starting to droop again. She had to finish this assignment before she fell asleep, though.

“Are you planning on sneezing in my face? If not, I’m planning on staying.” He sat the pot in his hands down on the kitchen counter and walked over to her bed. “Masato sent some soup. He had a scheduled writing session with Haruka, but he wanted to make you something.”

“That’s sweet of him,” she said, cracking a small smile. She’d have to thank him later.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine,” she said, waving him off. “I’ve been sleeping a lot, and I apparently only passed out because my heart issue got a little wild from the dehydration, but I haven’t had any more palpitations and I’ve been working from here, so it’s all okay. I just— hey!”

Tokiya outright snatched the laptop from her hands and placed it on the desk across the room.

“You need to sleep. And drink more water.”

“You’re a massive hypocrite,” she muttered, pouting. He took a seat in the chair beside the bed, smirking a little.

“You are, too, by the looks of it. How much sleep have you been getting? You’re certainly not eating properly. That much was clear when we put away your kitchen items.”

“I’m _fine_ ,” Melody protested, but one glare from Tokiya cut her off. How he could be two years younger than her and still strike the fear of God into her with a single look, she’d never know. The only assuring part was that it worked both ways.

“You’re in bed and obviously sick, and you were so dehydrated from your fever that you collapsed at your desk. You are _not_ fine.” Tokiya went towards the kitchen and dug out a bowl from the cabinet and poured a glass of water for her. Melody wondered for a moment how he knew where things were before she remembered that she was probably involved in organizing the kitchen. 

“Okay, maybe I’m slightly _less_ fine than I’ve led you to believe…” Melody admitted, watching him ladle soup from the crock into a bowl.

“You’re exhausted, Mels. You’re not eating and you just slept the better part of forty-eight hours. Here. Eat.” He handed her the bowl and a spoon, and Melody had to admit… it smelled amazing. It looked like chicken and rice with vegetables— carrots, celery, peas, and spinach.

“Holy shit,” she breathed. How was it possible that chicken and rice soup could taste that good?

“Hijirikawa is a truly amazing cook,” Tokiya said with a smile. He took a seat in the chair beside her bed, the one next to the lamp where she normally read before bed. “And before you ask, I ate lunch before I brought this up. It’s all for you.”

“How did you get stuck with the sick girl shift?” Melody smiled wryly as she slowly ate her soup. She’d have to ask Masato for some tips once she was feeling up to par.

“Quartet Night is off recording, but otherwise I just happened to catch Masato at the right time and volunteered. And… I wanted to ask about this.” It took a moment or two of fishing around in his messenger bag, but Tokiya eventually pulled forth a large, battered, quite familiar black sketchbook.

Melody went cold. She wasn’t sure what to think or do. Should she play dumb? She wanted her sketchbook back, but where did he find it? And how did he know it was hers? Did he look in it? What all had he seen? He probably thought she was a complete idiot now after seeing all those pages scrambled together with nonsense ideas and sketches and sticky notes.

“It’s yours, isn’t it?” Well, at least he wasted no time getting to the point. Melody was on the brink of denying it, but he cut off that opportunity, too. “I noticed the handwriting on one of the notes on Ringo’s desk looked like the writing in the book, so I asked them who wrote it.”

“Has anyone told you that you could have been a very successful detective in another life?” She slumped back against the pillows and continued to eat her soup, avoiding Tokiya’s eyes. “Where did you find it?”

“At the Joker Trap photoshoot last week. You left it on a table.”

“Fuck,” she groaned, squeezing her eyes shut. “It must have slipped out when I was digging through those folders looking for Ringo’s document. Thanks for finding it. Did… um… I guess you looked in it.”

She sounded more despondent than she intended, but it was mostly due to embarrassment. He would have had to look in it to recognize the handwriting on a note. It wasn’t like she kept her innermost thoughts in there like a journal, but it was close enough, and it represented a part of herself that she wasn’t quite comfortable sharing. Soup now finished, Melody put her empty bowl on the bedside table with a dull clunk, only for Tokiya to press the glass of water into her hands.

“I did. I called around the studio, but no one ever reported it missing, so I thought I might be able to find a name or more information, and…” he trailed off, glancing from the book in his hands back up to her face. “Melody, this is amazing. You _have_ to know how incredible this is.”

He gently placed the book on her bedside table as Melody blinked in confusion.

“It’s not… It’s just embarrassing.” She floundered in the face of his praise, clutching her glass a little more tightly. “It’s just sketches and dumb lyrics and oh shit _yousawthesketchesIdidofyouguys_.” If it was possible to raise your temperature via blushing alone, Melody was certain she’d accomplished it. That book had songs, lyric sketches, costume sketches, and pose studies that she’d done over the last year or so. More recently, there were a few sketches and watercolor portraits of some of the Starish and Quartet Night members that she’d done in her spare time. She liked drawing people she knew, and they were there beside portraits of her friends and family, but it didn’t make it any less humiliating.

“You’re a creative powerhouse, and your songs are _good_.” He looked deadly serious, and Melody wasn’t sure if that made the situation better or worse.

“I don’t do that anymore,” she said softly, shrugging.

“It looks like you still do.” Tokiya tapped lightly on the hard cover of the sketchbook, as if to seal his point.

“I mean, sort of. Casually,” she admitted. “I’m just… I mean, I’m not you guys. I’m not Haruka. I don’t have whatever weird song magic she has, and I just write for fun when I feel like it.”

“Why do you do that?” He suddenly tensed, turning serious.

“What are you talking about? Why do I write?”

“No, _that_.” Tokiya waved his hands vaguely for a moment. “What you just did. You constantly write yourself off as less than you are.”

“I’m an assistant. It’s not exactly highly trained work—”

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I mean,” he snapped. Melody jumped, biting her lip as her muscles tensed. “Even if you were just an assistant, you’d be _Shining’s_ assistant, which is a feat in itself, and you would still be kind and empathetic and disturbingly mothering to everyone you meet, but that isn’t all you are. You find solutions to every problem you come across, and you consistently prove yourself to be a jack of all trades with a good head on your shoulders. You’re a creative performer and designer— you’re an _artist_.”

“I told you, I don’t do that anymore,” Melody said coldly, eyes narrowing.

“Why not? You could be incredible. You _are_ incredible—”

“Because I failed, okay?” Melody blurted, clenching her hands into fists. “I already tried and I failed. I did everything right. I went to fucking _Saotome Academy_ , just like you did. You want to know why I can keep up with Shining? It’s because I lived here for three years. I did what they told me, and then I signed on with a different agency, and what I got was stage fright and panic attacks and heart problems. I passed out after I walked off stage one night and the doctor grounded me. _That’s_ why. You satisfied now?”

Melody opened her mouth to speak again, but quickly closed it when she realized that she had no idea what to say. She let her tense shoulders sag and crossed her arms over her chest, looking away. Her cheeks burned and her heart raced, and Tokiya was silent for a long moment.

“I already knew,” he finally said.

“How long?”

“For certain? About two minutes,” Tokiya admitted. “I didn’t put it together until you mentioned your heart palpitations, but I did some research on my own.”

“Oh,” Melody said softly, unsure of what else to say in this situation. “Does _everyone_ know…?”

“To my knowledge, Quartet Night has an inkling, but I don’t think anyone else from Starish has recognized you.” Melody breathed a sigh of relief as Tokiya watched her carefully, his gaze wandering over her face. “Did you think it would change our opinion of you?”

“I didn’t want your pity,” she said honestly. “Plus, in my situation, would you really want to blurt out ‘oh, yeah, I used to do what you do, but then I completely flopped and I’m here now?’”

“I can understand that,” Tokiya conceded, nodding. “I wouldn’t consider you a flop, though. You stopped for your health.”

“I stopped for my _sanity_ ,” Melody corrected, shaking her head. “The doctors may have given the final word, but I was a zombie a long time before that. I wrote song lyrics like a robot. I was exhausted and shaking all the time, and I couldn’t sleep. My heart issues saved me, in a way. It got me out.”

Exhausted from her fever and spilling her story, the rest came tumbling out more easily than she would have liked. Tokiya was surprisingly easy to talk to on a good day, not to mention now, though she wasn’t sure how many people felt the same way. Maybe it was because she could understand the reasons for his prickly persona, or because she thought his sarcasm was funny rather than offensive. Maybe it was because she liked it when he laughed at her ridiculous comments and snarky asides. Whatever it was, she knew that after this, she wanted to talk to him more.

“Would you ever go back?”

“I don’t know.” Melody’s eyes were fixed on a point in middle space, gazing off at a memory that Tokiya couldn’t see. “Maybe if I could sing how I wanted. _Write_ how I wanted. Even then, I don’t know that I could handle it, and…”

_I’m scared to try, just in case I can’t._

_What happens if I can’t?_

“Have you ever heard of Hayato?” Tokiya asked, his expression suddenly a little melancholy.

“Yeah, he’s in your files. Your brother, right?” Melody asked.

“No. Me.”

“ _What_?!”

“That was a cover-up that Shining’s media services still perpetuate. After a while with my old agency, Hayato started to drain away every reason that I wanted to be a musician, so I switched agencies to debut as myself,” he explained. “If you ever think about performing again—”

“Tokiya, that’s nice of you, but I just don’t think I can. I’m really glad it worked out for you, but I don’t think it will for me.” She really was glad for him, and she hoped he knew. Right now, though, she didn’t have the strength to try again. Melody sighed, snuggling down in the blankets a little farther as she suppressed a yawn. She opened her mouth to speak, but cut off abruptly when Tokiya leaned closer to press his forehead against hers. She barely breathed for a moment, vision suddenly filled with his pale skin and long eyelashes.

“You’re not running a fever, but you should still sleep,” he murmured, pulling away. “Do you need anything?”

“No. Oh, but could you put the soup in the fridge? I’ll call Masato later to thank him.”

“Of course.” Tokiya rose from his chair, placed the soup pot in the refrigerator, and picked up Melody’s laptop from the desk across the room. “I’m taking this. You’ll get it back when you’re better.”

“Tokiya!” Melody whined. “I’m not a child, and I need that for work.”

“You’re not supposed to be working. You’re _sick_.”

“Fine. But put it on record that if I could walk without being really dizzy, I’d definitely fight you about this.”

* * *

Her next visitors didn’t come for another day, after she’d taken several long naps, slept through the night, and immersed herself in a novel. Though her fever was gone, it appeared that Tokiya was right: if Melody wanted to get any better, she needed to sleep. Her body was completely worn down form too long without proper rest. When the next knock on her door came, she felt a little more like herself, but was surprised to see Ranmaru walk in the door, a little ball of black and white fluff in his arms.

Upon closer inspection, she could see that the ball of fluff was actually a cat. Tiny and obviously curious, the little thing looked around the room with wide eyes, and Melody couldn’t help but note the contrast between Ranmaru’s normally surly demeanor and the fact that he apparently owned a very small pet.

“Thought you could use some cheering up since you’re no longer contagious.” Ranmaru took a seat in the chair beside her bed and sat the small cat on her lap. He sniffed around as if exploring the room, hesitantly investigating as if to see if Melody was a friend or a foe.

“Aww, hello,” Melody said softly. “Who are you, little one?”

“He’s a moody teenager, that’s what he is,” Ranmaru said, rolling his eyes. “His name is Ryuu. He’s a prickly little bastard, but cats seem to like you…”

He was right about that. There were occasionally studio cats at places where they filmed or recorded, and almost all of them wound up napping on Melody’s lap by the end of the day. It occasionally prevented her from doing her work efficiently, but she didn’t mind exchanging a little speed for the presence of a purring, furry heater on her lap.

“Hi, Ryuu,” she said softly. The cat sniffed for a moment and pressed his head against her hand, nuzzling it gently.

“See? I knew he’d like you.”

“He seems like a sweet boy.”

“He’s not, trust me. He’s a little shit.”

The cat let out a little chirrup as if to argue, curling up in Melody’s lap as though he had no intention to move. That was fine with her, though. She gently petted the little ball of black and white fluff, listening as he began to purr gently.

“Maybe he’s acting nice for company,” she said with a giggle. “How are the recording sessions going? Tokiya’s confiscated my laptop, so I can’t check on much with just my phone.”

“It’s going well. Haruka’s getting stressed about finishing the songs for the summer albums, but she doesn’t want us to know, and Shining still hasn’t hired a steady composer for Quartet Night.”

“Still? I’ve been scheduling interviews for weeks,” Melody groaned, letting her head fall back against the pillows.

“Shining loves Haruka,” Ranmaru said with a shrug. “She’s good, but it’s running her ragged, and I know it’s hard on you to keep looking for composers for individual songs.”

“Yeah, well… there are only so many composers in Japan. We have a regular rotation, but no one is up to his standard like Haruka.”

Ryuu shifted slightly from his place in her lap, rising to stretch and yawn. He cocked his head to the side for a moment as if surveying the room before he decided that climbing up Melody’s torso to rest on her shoulder was _clearly_ the most favorable path.

“Hey, Ryuu, be nice,” Ranmaru chided.

“Oh, he’s fine.” Melody giggled as the cat meowed in her ear. “I hope you can find someone soon. I know it’s just as hard on all of you to have to adjust to different composers, and then just when they get to know you, they’re gone.”

“Don’t worry about us,” Ranmaru said, shaking his head. “We’ll make it work.”

“You need someone who understands your style, though. Haruka’s songs work well for the crossover groups, but I’m positive Shining keeps looking for composers because her songs are a little too rainbow bubblegum for you guys.” Haruka was good, absolutely. However, Quartet Night’s style was very different from Starish, and however good she was, edgy music wasn’t necessarily what she wanted to compose. It was a weaker style for her, and Shining could probably tell that it was draining on Haruka as much as it would be damaging to Quartet Night’s image and popularity to suddenly change their sound.

“You’re right, but… hey,” Ranmaru said suddenly, his eyes going to the book on the table. “That was _yours_?”

“Uh… yeah,” Melody said with a shrug, lifting Ryuu off her shoulder just to have something to do with her hands.

“Tokiya was going nuts looking for the owner.” He let out a low whistle, shaking his head. “Didn’t know you were an artist, pipsqueak.”

“Did _you_ look through it, too?” Melody shrunk down under the blankets, absolutely mortified.

“Just the first couple of pages. Don’t worry, your dark secrets are safe.”

“Hey, I don’t have any dark secrets!” Melody paused, looking off into the distance dramatically. “Well, none you need to be aware of.”

“Weirdo,” Ranmaru scoffed, mussing her hair like an older brother. Melody smiled and put her hair back in place as he reached down and scooped up Ryuu. “Okay, come on, kitty. We should let the lady rest.”

Ryuu meowed as if to agree.

“Thanks for dropping by, boys.” Melody smiled, giving a small wave as they turned to leave. “I’ll let you know if we hear anything about a composer.”

“Just focus on getting better, okay? It’s a pain not having you around.”

Ranmaru left without another word, but Melody couldn’t help but smile.


	8. In Which There is a Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm dying because I straight up forgot a chapter due to my own shoddy numbering (long story)

“This is horrible. You know that, right?” Melody asked, shaking out the bills and change from the jar. “It’s only been three weeks, and there’s enough money in here that we can easily both have a really nice lunch somewhere.”

It was Friday afternoon and a rare day that both Melody and Tokiya were in town for lunch. She put aside her work long enough to pull the jar from her desk, which was already packed full, and count up the bills inside. Tokiya met her in the office after his morning rehearsals, and blessedly had the afternoon off, so they wouldn’t be rushed to go out to eat.

“We’ve both missed an average of one meal a day, haven’t we?” Tokiya said with a sigh as Melody gathered up the money. Unfortunately, he was right. Ugh, that was just awful.

“Well… at least we’re getting a good one today. Come on, let’s roll.”

They wound up at a health food restaurant close to the agency. It was a nice, short walk on a sunny day, and it was certainly refreshing to get outside. Though her office had windows, Melody couldn’t open them, and it just wasn’t the same as being outside in the fresh air.

“You know, I won the bet,” Tokiya said mischievously, walking up to the lunch counter.

“What bet?!” Melody certainly did not remember any bets.

“You said last week at practice that you bet it would take us a month to get enough money in the jar. I said that I disagreed. It’s been three weeks, so I win.”

“Wha—that’s not fair,” Melody pouted, poking him in the arm. “We never even made a real bet!”

“All’s fair in love and lunches,” Tokiya declared.

“Fine, you won the bet, I guess,” Melody said, laughing. “What do you want?”

“I want to know what you wanted to sing.”

“… What?”

“Can I take your order?”

The cashier politely smiled, and Melody turned to place her order, feeling a little confused and slightly annoyed. After they both ordered, they scanned the room for empty tables, and Tokiya continued speaking quietly.

“You said you couldn’t sing how you wanted, but you never said what you _did_ want.”

“You’re a Sneaky Snu, you know that?” she grumbled, heading towards the back of the restaurant.

Tokiya shrugged nonchalantly, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. Oh, he knew exactly what he was doing, and he wasn’t at all ashamed. Melody just wondered what made him so curious about her idol life. That part of her life was over, and she was doing her best to move on and forget it. Tokiya didn’t seem to want to let that happen, for whatever reason.

“Well… they had me singing bubblegum pop. Obviously, I’m pretty short, and they said I could really easily work the cute and energetic idol angle, so we went with that, but…” she paused, giving a breathy, humorless laugh. “I wanted to sing rock. Maybe alternative.”

“I think it suits you,” he said, nodding.

Melody smiled a little bitterly. She’d thought so, too, but it just hadn’t worked out.

“You, my friend, need a hobby. Besides prying into my past life, that is,” Melody said pointedly, taking a seat at a table for two by the window.

“I have them!” Tokiya said indignantly. He took the seat across from her and hung his messenger bag on the back of the chair. “You know I’m constantly reading. That’s enough to keep me busy, and I draw, too, sometimes.”

“Really?” Melody couldn’t help but grin, imagining Tokiya with a sketchbook out in a park or at a desk with art supplies, the same look of concentration on his face as when he worked on song lyrics. It was a much softer image of him than his professional persona.

“I wish I had more time for it, but music keeps me busy.”

“You should come out to the park with me one day, or go down to the gardens behind the dorms. They’re good places to do scenery studies.”

“Alright. I’ll do that the next time I have free time.”

Melody looked at her wrist as if glancing at an invisible watch. “Ah, so that’s four months, two days, and five hours from now, right?”

“Something like that,” Tokiya said, chuckling. Melody liked his genuine smile. Much like Camus, Tokiya’s personality was quite different in front of the camera in comparison to when he was around people he knew well. His professional idol smile was dazzling, but she much preferred Tokiya, Camus, and all of them like they were now. Casual. Relaxed.

Lunch passed more quickly than she would have liked, lost in a flood of casual conversation about art and schedules and the upcoming albums. Tokiya was making good progress on his small group rehearsals, and they were all planning choreography for the summer beach show. It was set to be a real spectacle, which meant that the boys had just as much planning as she had paperwork to fill out.

On the way back to the agency, Melody tilted her face up to the sunshine, feeling much more relaxed than she had before despite the looming flood of things yet to be done. Even on a Friday afternoon, things rarely let up, and she’d be pulling a few hours through the weekend in order to manage it all. That was alright, though. For now, she felt content.

“I hope it takes longer than three weeks to fill up the jar next time,” she said with a laugh.

“That’s mildly offensive,” Tokiya said, eyebrow raised.

“Not because of _you_!” Melody flushed, backpedaling. She hadn’t intended it to be a slight at all. “I just meant that we’d be forming better habits.”

“I understand. You’re too easy to tease.” Tokiya smirked, obviously pleased with himself, and Melody rolled her eyes. Jackass. “We should do this again, with or without the jar.”

“We could make it a weekly thing? I know it wouldn’t be the same day every week because our schedules are never consistent, but we could plan it as we go,” she suggested.

“I’ll plan to hear from you next week, then.” He nodded firmly, almost as if they’d just made a business transaction. Melody was already looking forward to it, though. Having some semblance of regularity in her schedule might be good for her, and having a real friend to talk to was even better.

“Till next week!”

* * *

Charity events weren’t necessarily the most fun things in the world, but they were for a good cause, so Melody never minded the wining and dining too much. Starish and Heavens were jointly participating in a charity dinner to fund music and arts programs in schools, and as both Shining’s assistant and a member of Shining Agencies’ top ranking staff, Melody was required to attend. They’d made their way to a hotel several hours away from the agency, and now everyone was busy getting ready in their own rooms.

She was still in a bath robe an hour before they needed to leave, pinning her curly hair into an updo that was just messy enough to look artful, studded with a few rhinestone pins and leaving curls draped around her face. It didn’t do much to disguise her unruly bangs, but at least it distracted from them.

A knock on the divider door between her room and the next caught her attention, and the door opened only a moment later.

“Hey, Melody?” Haruka opened the door slightly, peeking inside. She was wearing a bath robe, too, apparently also trying to get ready without getting makeup on her dress. “Can you put my hair up?”

“Sure, come on in.” Melody put the last pin in her hair and checked it in the mirror while Haruka wandered in. As usual, her bangs were entirely untamable, but that was fine.

She turned around to face Haruka, ready to ask what kind of hairstyle she wanted… and immediately stopped.

“Oh, Haruka…” Melody sighed, closing her eyes and biting her lip for a moment so that she didn’t laugh. That would be cruel. “Go get your makeup, honey. I’m going to fix… this.” She waved her hand vaguely in the direction of Haruka’s face. Even though the massive amounts of foundation, she could see the younger girl blush before she immediately turned tail.

Her face looked a little like clown makeup, or like a theater student trying to learn how to put on stage makeup, but who picked entirely the wrong skin tones and didn’t quite understand how to make eyeshadow work. Melody wasn’t sure why she’d chosen tonight to put on makeup when she normally didn’t wear any at all, but she’d absolutely gone all out, and not in the best of ways. Haruka returned only moments later with a small makeup bag, which Melody immediately took from her.

“Sit,” Melody said firmly, guiding her over to the edge of the bed. She snatched a bottle of makeup remover and quickly got to work swiping away the copious amounts of product on Haruka’s face. “Never done your own makeup before?”

“… Not much,” she admitted. “I just wanted to look nice.”

Thankfully, it didn’t take too long to get the makeup off her face, and it didn’t leave very many smears from eyeliner. Those could easily be disguised with some careful application of new makeup. She took Haruka’s makeup bag and brushes from her, noting that it looked like the products inside had barely ever been touched.

“I was in wardrobe for years, dear. Let me help.” Melody took one look at the foundation bottle and shook her head. “This doesn’t match. It’s pale enough, but it’s too pink for you… Let’s do this instead.”

She took a bottle of BB cream from her own kit, smeared a little on a clean sponge, and went about covering the very few spots on Haruka’s face with an uneven skin tone. After that, she took a large brush and swept the powder foundation across her face.

“You’ve got great skin. You don’t need that much product. Close your eyes.”

“Tomo used to do my makeup for me when we roomed together,” Haruka said softly as Melody worked on applying some subtle eyeshadow. She decided to go with natural shades, not even bothering with other colors.

“I learned from the other girls at my high school. My mom wasn’t very good at it, so I had a few experiences like this, too. Once you get the hang of it, it's a little more like painting. Okay, open your eyes and pout your lips— not that much. There.”

Melody finished applying Haruka’s makeup, did a few final checks, brushed on the slightest hint of blush, and turned the composer towards the mirror across from the bed. She looked better now—more natural.

“Thank you,” she said quietly, smiling softly.

“Why the makeup?” Melody asked, pulling out her own, rather extensive makeup bag. It wasn’t that she even wore makeup that often. She simply liked experimenting, and she kept a theatrical makeup set as well as standard products.

“I thought it would make me look older,” Haruka admitted. She watched intently as Melody quickly and efficiently applied concealer and foundation, not bothering with any intense contouring.

“Are you dressed up for someone in particular?” Melody asked, raising an eyebrow as she reached for a gold eyeshadow palette. Haruka blushed. That was as good as a “yes.”

“If I tell you, do you think you could maybe talk to him for me?” she asked quietly. Melody just sighed, not bothering to pause in her makeup regimen.

“ _How_ old are you?” she asked, though she meant it good-naturedly. “It’s better if you talk to him yourself, you know.”

“I can’t!” she hissed, hands clenched on the fabric of her robe as she shook her head. “What if he doesn’t like me?”

“Then you cry a little and you eat some ice cream, and you get up the next day and move on.” Melody smiled sadly. “It sucks. Trust me, I know, but you get past it.”

The room was silent as Melody finished applying her makeup, taking a final look in the mirror before she turned to retrieve the garment bag with her dress from the closet. She needed to look more stylish than professional for this party, so Ringo helped her pick something nice, blessedly on Shining’s tab. Her new job might be enough to cover the bills, but it didn’t pay enough to splurge on formal dresses.

“So he’s older, then?” Melody smirked as Haruka pouted, taking a seat at the edge of the bed. “Ah, that’s a yes. It’s not Reiji, is it? Because I’m drawing the line and saying he’s too old for you.”

Melody put the garment bag down on the bed and unzipped it, smoothing out the fabric of her party dress. It was a dusty pink gown with a modest hi-low hem, the sweetheart neckline dipping into off-the-shoulder sleeves and a low back. Ah, the joy of sticky bras, though she did love the cut of the dress.

“Go bring your dress and let’s figure out how we’re pinning up your hair,” Melody said while Haruka spluttered. Not Reiji, then. Good. He really _was_ too old for her. While the younger girl went to get her dress, Melody slipped on the pink gown and hunted for a pair of nude heels in her suitcase.

The sound of soft footsteps alerted her to the fact that Haruka had entered. She was wearing a knee-length, dark blue dress with a tulle skirt and a halter neckline, a tasteful silver chain belt around the waist. It suited her image as a composer and her personality, but she looked a little uncomfortable.

“Do I look like a little girl?” she asked quietly.

“You look like _you_ ,” Melody said gently. She almost felt bad for her. The poor girl was smitten with someone, probably someone from Starish, and obviously wasn’t quite sure what to do about it.

“You’re shorter than I am, and you look a lot older,” Haruka pointed out.

“I’m short and I have a round baby face. I have to work at it, or people think I’m fourteen,” Melody said with a giggle. “The right dress will make anyone look their age, though, and that looks nice on you. Why are you so worried about it?”

“It’s Tokiya,” she blurted, wincing.

Melody blinked.

Somehow, she hadn’t been expecting that one.

“Okay.”

“… That’s it?” Haruka blinked.

“I mean, I’m shocked, but not overly shocked, and it feels kind of mean to tease you right at this second. I will, though. Later,” she clarified. Not now, when they were both still trying to get ready. “Sit in that chair and I’ll pin up your hair.”

“Is it long enough to curl like yours?” Haruka asked shyly.

“I don’t have a curling iron,” Melody admitted. “Mine has enough natural curl that it's better I just work with it and encourage it than trying to brush it. Trust me, you don't want to see that frizz. I can do some pincurls around your face if you want, though?”

“Please.” Haruka nodded, smiling, and Melody got to work, brushing through Haruka’s slightly damp hair.

“So… what are you going to do about it?”

“Huh?” Haruka squeaked, tensing slightly.

“Tokiya.”

“Oh… Well, I thought… I’d ask you to talk to him,” she said with a sigh, clearly understanding that her initial plan of action had failed.

“Okay, so what’s plan B?” Melody swept up locks of her hair into a delicate side braid, pinning it in place before she started forming a bun. Styling hair was relaxing, even If it was difficult to work with hair as short as Haruka’s.

“Uh… I don’t know,” she admitted.

“How long have you liked this boy?!” Melody raised an eyebrow, a little incredulous. Then again, she was a planner. Haruka… was not. The composer seemed to fly by her own fancy for the most part, and for the most part it worked.

“I’ve always liked him. I admired him even when he was Hayato, and then I got to know him a little more…” She trailed off, pouting a little in frustration.

“And how often do you talk to him alone?”

“Not too often. I get nervous.”

“Well, there’s step one. Ask him to dance. Feel him out- metaphorically, I mean. Flirt with him, and see if he flirts back!” Melody said helplessly, wondering if the younger girl had ever even had another crush or relationship… and then she realized that Haruka likely hadn’t.

“How... do I... _flirt_?” Haruka’s brow furrowed, eerie yellow eyes concerned. Melody sighed, shaking her head as she continued to push pins into Haruka’s hair, working it into an ornate bun and setting up pincurls to frame her face.

“That is something that I have neither the time nor ability to teach you, dear. Just go be yourself. Bat your eyelashes, compliment him, and see what happens."

* * *

The party was in full swing two hours after it began, with dinner cleared and dancing beginning. Melody shrunk off to the sidelines with a glass of wine and managed to stay there for all of fifteen minutes before Eiji came to ask her for a dance. He looked so angelic that she didn’t have the heart to deny him, which led to a round of being passed to Natsuki… and then Otoya… and then Shion.

When she finally managed to free herself from the dance floor, she resumed her post at the wall and surveyed the room. It looked like, thank goodness, Haruka had managed to cajole Tokiya into a dance, and hopefully that meant time to really talk to him. Van and Ren were effortlessly schmoozing the big wig corporate sponsors in the corner of the room, while Cecil and Otoya seemed to just as effortlessly captivate their wives and children. All in all, it didn’t seem like she was needed any longer, which meant it was time to make her exit.

All she had to do was sneak out, make her way to the elevator, grab her belongings from the coat closet on the first floor, and hail a cab without being caught. It didn’t seem too difficult, and she’d done it before when the alcohol was flowing and it was quite clear that no one would really miss her presence.

This time, though, she only made it through the first two steps in her plan before it fell apart.

“Hey, wait—” A hand stopped the elevator doors before they closed, and in stepped Van. “Are you trying to sneak out of here without saying hello?”

“You looked busy,” Melody said with a shrug, a little embarrassed to be caught trying to sneak out. She pressed the button for the first floor, anyways. No point in hiding it anymore. The doors closed ad the elevator began to descend.

“If I can’t dance with you, at least let me walk you out,” Van offered.

“That’s nice of— whoa!"

The elevator jerked to a halt.

And stayed there.

The doors did not open.

“Oh, no…” Melody murmured. Panic flared in her chest, but she forced herself to be calm. People got stuck in elevators all the time. It would be fine. “Van, do you—”

“Already on it.” Van held up his cell phone and dialed the number for emergency services. Melody barely heard the call, thoughts racing at a hundred miles an hour. How long would it take to get out? What if something bad happened while— wait. Statistically, a stuck elevator wasn’t going to move anywhere. It didn’t feel unstable, either, just… stuck.

“Melody?”

What about everyone upstairs? How would they know what happened? Well, Van had a phone, and miraculously had a signal, so they could probably send word to someone at the party.

“Melody!”

“Ah!” She jumped, jolted out of her thoughts. “Sorry…” Melody smiled sheepishly.

“It’s fine. Emergency services said they’re sending people to get us out, but I don’t know how long it’ll take. You okay?” he asked, brow furrowed in concern.

“I’m fine. Just a little nervous.” Melody sighed and sank to the floor, smoothing her dress and kicking off her heels. If they were going to be here for a while, she might as well settle in. “Are _you_ okay?”

“Yeah, I just… don’t like enclosed spaces,” he said with a shrug. He sat down beside her so his shoulder brushed hers, looking a little tense.

Impulsively, Melody reached for his hand, hoping the touch might be comforting. Van twined their fingers together without hesitation and leaned his head against her shoulder. His curly hair tickled her neck a little, and she felt a flush crawling up her skin. It was a good thing he couldn’t see her face, she thought.

“Well, as long as we’re stuck in here, why don’t you tell me about yourself?” he asked.

“Not much to tell. I like music. My family is small but close. I work for Shining and I play the clarinet.”

“Ah, see, I already knew all that,” Van said with a sigh. “Tell me something I couldn’t guess.”

“I like watching old black and white Doctor Who while I meal prep. Your turn.” She leaned against him a little, suddenly feeling quite warm and very sleepy. It could be the panic or the alcohol, or possibly just the fact that Van was warm and he smelled nice, but it suddenly didn’t seem like such a bad wait.

“I like cheap beer better than the wine they serve at these things.”

Melody gave a snorting laugh, covering her mouth with her hand as she tried and failed to stifle it.

“Fair,” she conceded. “I like whiskey or gin better, myself, but wine makes the sixty-year-old businessmen flirting with me a little more bearable when there’s no other option.”

“Ugh, gin tastes like Pine Sol.” Van shuddered a little. “You know, all you have to do is flag one of us down when that happens, and we’ll get you out of it. Heavens or Starish.”

“Thanks, but I’m almost used to the creepy old men by now. Just play oblivious and they normally back off,” she said with a sigh.

“You shouldn’t have to deal with that, though. I don’t know what I’d do if one of my sisters was in that position.”

“You have sisters?” Melody asked, surprised.

“Yep. My family is big, but I’m the only son. My sisters are the light of my life.” Van laughed softly, launching into a long-winded tale about his youngest sister, how she loved to play outside, and how she had a habit of coming in muddy. Another of his sisters was obsessed with princesses and fairies, and he’d dressed up like a knight with her for Halloween one year.

It was relaxing to listen to him talk, and she felt her eyes drift closed and the panic in her chest calm a little as she listened to the low cadence of his voice. Some time later, Van paused in his storytelling, and only a second after Melody could feel his nose tickling at the crook of her shoulder. She pulled away with a yelp, surprised.

“What was that?!”

“Has anyone ever told you that you smell like peppermints?” Van asked, eyebrows raised.

“That’s my body wash, but I can’t really say anyone’s been close enough to smell it,” she spluttered, eyebrows raised.

“Ah, then I’m honored.” Van released the hand she’d forgotten he was holding and draped his arm around her waist like it was the most natural thing in the world, pulling her against his side. She automatically rested her head on his shoulder, though she felt a little tense.

“Hey, relax. I won’t hurt you, you know,” he murmured. Melody looked up, suddenly finding him much closer than she’d expected. Brown eyes half lidded and a small smile on his face, Van tilted her chin up with his free hand and kissed her.

It felt like something short-circuited in her mind. She couldn’t quite comprehend the situation, but his touch was gentle and his lips were soft, and she didn’t really think she minded it so much.

“There. Not so bad?” He looked hopeful, expectant. A strange pressure settled in Melody’s chest, like a fog over her thoughts and emotions, and she suddenly, horrifyingly realized that in all her planning, she hadn’t quite thought through what to do at this point.

“… Not so bad,” she conceded.

“Good, because I’d like to do that again.”

She barely had time to think before his mouth was on hers again, warm and insistent. Melody hesitantly leaned towards him, giving herself over to the sensation for a moment as his fingers gently trailed down her spine and his tongue slipped into her mouth. She had to hand it to him, he was a _talented_ kisser, sending shivers down her spine that made her back arch and a soft moan well up in her throat. It had been over a year since she’d been kissed, and it probably showed, but as much as every muscle in her body wanted to let him continue touching her, Melody knew in her heart that she couldn’t. She pulled away carefully, avoiding his eyes.

“Van, I’m—”

“Still not sure, are you?” he asked with a sigh.

“I’m sorry.” Melody bit her lip, gaze fixed on the floor. “I can’t commit to something like this.”

“It’s okay. I’m not asking you to.” Van settled back against her with his head on her shoulder, holding her hand once more. Melody slowly relaxed again, even though it felt like her mind was rushing along at a hundred miles an hour.

However, maybe that was what she needed. They sat in silence for an unknown amount of time as Melody’s thoughts raced and her heart rate slowly began to decrease. Something about the combination of Van’s warmth, the exhaustion of sheer panic, and the silence in the elevator was enough to lull her into a fitful sleep.

The next thing she heard was a loud scraping noise, and she blearily opened her eyes to a shaking elevator, watching as someone from the outside forced open the doors. It turned out that they were only stuck between floors, and the top third of the elevator was high enough that they would be able to crawl out once the doors were open.

“You guys okay in there?” The voice was unfamiliar, but welcome.

“We’re fine!” Melody called, shaking Van awake. She was on her feet in seconds, slightly stiff from her nap on the floor but otherwise unharmed. With a little help from the emergency crew and a boost from Van, they were out of the elevator in minutes. Ren, Natsuki, Eiji, and a few other concerned partygoers gathered around the elevator, which had apparently gotten stuck almost immediately, as they climbed out onto the floor where the party was.

She was shaking a little when she finally found her footing, happy to see the familiar faces.

Ren hugged her close for a moment, patting her back gently.

“Aww, don’t I get a hug?” Van asked, pouting.

“Yep, bring it in!” Ren let Melody go and went to hug his friend, who just sighed.

“I meant from the lady, but you’ll do.” Van smiled and wrapped his arms around Ren.

“You were in there for two hours and you didn’t get a hug from her?” Ren teased. “You’re losing your touch.”

Melody rolled her eyes as she carefully made her way across the room, intending to drop by the bathroom and exit the party like nothing had ever happened. However, she was quickly stopped by several members of Starish. Masato, Tokiya, and Natsuki caught her heading away from the commotion by the elevators.

“Melody, thank goodness,” Masato cried, eyes wide. “We were worried.”

“Are you hurt?” Natsuki asked, hands on her shoulders as he looked her over for injuries.

“No, I’m fine. Don’t worry,” Melody said, giving a reassuring smile. “I think I’ll be taking the stairs to my apartment for a while, though.”

“I’m glad you’re safe,” Tokiya said sincerely. “Ah… do you want to put your shoes on?”

Melody looked down, surprised. She was barefoot and hadn’t noticed, still holding her heels in her hand rather than wearing them.

“Oh.”

She dropped the shoes onto the floor with a rather unceremonious clatter and slipped them on, unhappy to note that her legs were still wobbling. It was fine, though. They were out and she was fine, and they were fixing the elevator, and shouldn’t Van be more shaken up than she was if he didn’t like tight spaces? He seemed fine!

The other option was that the elevator wasn’t the only thing that had her shaken, but she refused to think about that right now. All she wanted was to go home.

“Come on. I’ll walk you out.”

She couldn’t quite process who had hold of her arm, steadying her and guiding her towards the stairs all in one motion, until they were almost halfway down the first flight of stairs.

“How’s your heart?” Masato asked quietly. He changed his grip so that one arm was around her waist, supporting her as she walked down the stairs. Even with the extra support and holding onto the rail, she still didn’t quite feel steady.

“How did you know?” she asked with a breathy laugh. She’d only just noticed it, herself. At the landing she stopped, sighed, and kicked off her heels again. No point in giving herself more reasons to stumble.

“You’re shaking and your breathing is too fast. Also, Tokiya mentioned that he was concerned about it while we were waiting on the rescue team. Are you going to be alright?”

“I’m fine. Worst case scenario, I pass out, but we probably won't get there,” Melody deadpanned. Masato, perhaps sensing her apprehension, was silent the rest of the way down the staircase. Melody tried to focus on her breathing, but her thoughts wouldn’t quiet down. Everything was spinning and fast and something was wrong but she had no idea what.

At the bottom of the stairs, Masato paused, holding her back before they left the stairwell.

“What happened in there? Did he hurt you?” he asked, obviously concerned.

“No! No, Masa, it’s just… I don’t want to talk about it right now.” Melody sighed, holding his arm a little more tightly. “You should go back to the party. It’s just… It’s been a night, you know?”

“Maybe I should go back with you—”

“No, I’m fine. Look, I’ll text you when I get back, okay?” Melody offered. Masato looked skeptical for a moment, but he eventually nodded.

“Take care. Just let any of us know if you need us, and we’ll come running,” he said sincerely.

“Thank you. I’ll be fine.” Melody hugged him close for a moment, smiling reassuringly. Masato froze stiff, eyes wide and a slight flush on his cheeks. She just hoped it was enough to convince him that things were fine when she wasn’t entirely sure what was wrong, herself.

* * *

Even after they left the hotel and returned to the agency, but Melody still couldn’t sleep. She kept replaying the events in the elevator over and over, trying to look at them from different angles, trying to analyze what she felt and what he felt and what she was meant to do next. Work kept her distracted, but she’d barely slept in two days, and tonight was no different.

She hadn’t even thought about setting foot in here since she came to Shining Agencies, but it was four in the morning and she was wide awake, and there were only so many things she could think to do about that. Still frazzled from her experience in the elevator and feeling confused and conflicted about too many other things, the practice rooms that once seemed like a horrible reminder of her own failure now seemed like a sanctuary.

She didn’t even bother to close the door. The hallways were empty, and even Masato wasn’t down here at this time of night. Or... morning. Whatever it was now. The sound wouldn’t drift up to the other floors, and leaving the door open would keep the room from overheating if she chose to stay in there for a longer period of time.

The piano almost felt like a foreign object under her hands, but as she picked her way through a familiar melody and chords, the music began to come back to her. She played and played without keeping track of the time, and when playing didn’t feel like enough, she started to sing.

 “ _I’m drinking wine and thinking bliss is on the other side of this; I just need a compass and a willing accomplice…”_

Her voice felt a little rusty, but she was on pitch. It felt like releasing the clasp on a set of memories that she’d long kept locked tight, a relief and a burden at once.

“ _All the doubts that fill my head cascading up and down again, up and down around again, down and up and down again.”_

She’d written the song right before starting her new job here, and had only sung it once before moving in. Going through a job change and a life change and trying to claw herself out of a massive depressive slump, it felt like there was nothing to hold on to except those painful memories, and they weren’t helping her, so she swept them to the side.

“ _Pennies in a well, a million dollars in the fountain of a hotel, fortune teller that says maybe you won’t go to hell, but I’m not scared at all…”_

A tear leaked out of the corner of her eye and rolled down her cheek, but she kept her voice steady.

“ _The cracks in the crystal, the cracks in the crystal ball._ ”

She made it through the bridge before she stopped singing and finished the song on piano, feeling full and empty all at once, relieved and confused. As she finished, she was so focused on her music that she almost didn’t hear the shuffling noise in the hallway.

Melody stopped abruptly, scrubbing the tears from her face as she leapt up and looked out the door, glancing both ways down the hallway. However, the area was empty. Perhaps she’d just imagined it?

“Hello?” she called. “Is someone there?”

No answer.

Odd.

Now thoroughly frazzled, Melody left the practice room and scrambled back up to her apartment. The digital clock now read 5:32AM, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to get another wink of sleep. Instead, she pulled out her laptop and began working on a few things she needed to take care of later in the day, when the office opened. It would probably be better to push that out of her mind. The shuffling was a figment of her imagination. Probably.

 


	9. In Which Melody Gets a Package

Several days later, Melody still had trouble sleeping, but the debatably good news was that since she slept very little, she was running ahead of schedule for the summer album work. The beach days were set up, transportation booked, photographers contacted, and recording time at the studios on Shining’s private island completely scheduled. It was still hard to believe that he actually owned an entire island, but eh, everyone had their hobbies.

“Good morning, Melody.”

She looked up to see Reiji, a small package in hand, smiling as he stood at her office door.

“Hey! Come on in, Reiji.” Melody put aside her spreadsheets for the moment and gestured for him to sit down in one of the armchairs across from her desk. “What brings you all the way up here? Paperwork?”

“For once, no,” he said, shaking his head. “Firstly, Liz asked me to deliver this to you since I was heading up here. Someone sent you some mail.” Liz was their downstairs receptionist at the main agency building. Melody normally arrived in the mornings before she did and left after, so she only rarely remembered to pick up mail during her lunch breaks. Liz normally just had some poor soul deliver anything for her upstairs directly. Reiji placed the package on the desk, and Melody squinted at it, looking for a delivery label. There wasn’t one. The box was almost the size of a large book, but it was strangely light, and something slid inside when she moved it.

“Strange. I didn’t order anything…”

“She said it was on her desk this morning with a sticky note addressed to you,” Reiji said with a shrug.

“Hm. Weird…” Melody brushed it off for now. “What else did you need?”

“Well, if you’re willing and you’re not doing anything two weeks from Saturday, I could really use a favor,” he said sheepishly. Ah, so this was personal instead of business. That was fine. Reiji was a nice guy, and she wouldn’t mind doing just about anything to help him out after all the trouble he’d gone to in order to organize setting up her apartment.

“I’m free. What’s going on?”

“My cousin’s wedding. I need a date.”

“Oh. Sounds fun— I like weddings,” Melody said, nodding. That wasn’t so bad. Why had he seemed so nervous?

“More specifically, I need you to pretend to be my girlfriend.”

“… _What_?”

“I may have told my family that I’m dating someone to soothe their worries, and I may have implied that I’d bring her to the wedding. I need someone who’s discreet, and Haruka’s too young.”

Melody stared.

Opened her mouth.

Closed it.

“Reiji… I have a few questions, beginning with why on earth you thought it was a good idea to lie to your family?”

“I just didn’t want them to worry!” he protested, wincing. “They’re always concerned that I don’t socialize enough or that I’m not happy because I don’t have a girlfriend, so I might have… fictionalized one.”

Melody just glared, letting her expression speak for her.

“Alright, yes, it was a terrible decision, but it’s been done and I can’t back out on it now.”

“Okay, so if I say yes— _if_ —what would I need to do as this fictionalized girlfriend?”

“Just show up for the wedding and sit with me at the reception, and I’d like to think you wouldn’t mind a dance or two.”

Melody thought for a long moment. It was one night with Reiji’s family, who no doubt were aware that tabloids getting a whiff of his date would be bad for his career. She wouldn’t ever have to see them again. Well… probably. She didn’t want it to spiral into Christmas dinners and family vacations, but she did really owe him for all his help.

“… I have conditions,” she finally said. Reiji, overjoyed, jumped up from the chair with a whooping cheer, rushing around to the other side of the desk to hug her tightly.

“You’re the most wonderful manager to ever exist!”

“Not your manager,” Melody protested, voice muffled against his shoulder as she patted his back gently. When he finally released her, she straightened her clothing and ticked off items on her fingers as she spoke. “Number one: I refuse to be in any of the official wedding photos. Candids at the reception are fine, but I’m not going to be immortalized with the family photos.”

“Done,” Reiji said with a nod.

“Number two: This isn’t long term. After this is over you fabricate some kind of breakup story. Twist it however you want to make your family think you’re better off on your own.”

“Aww, you don’t want to date me?” Reiji winked, but Melody wasn’t amused. He sighed, obviously unoffended. “Fine. That sounds like a reasonable plan to satisfy my family, anyhow.”

“Good,” Melody said with a nod, satisfied with those conditions. “I think we can make this work.”

“Thank you so much.” The relief in Reiji’s voice was almost worth the suffering she’d just agreed to. Almost.

“You’re welcome. Now, go on and get to the rehearsal that I’m well aware you’re almost late for, and text me the dress code so I know what to wear.” She made the schedules. Of _course_ she knew that he was almost late.

“Will do! You’re the greatest.” Reiji smiled brightly as he bounded out of the room. Slumping back in her chair, Melody barely had time to regret what she’d just gotten herself into before she noticed the unopened package on her desk.

It was only superficially taped closed, so it was easy to open, but she didn’t know what to think when she opened the cardboard flaps. Inside was a box about as big as her palm, a normal-sized manila envelope, and one small envelope. The small envelope only read “Melody” on the outside. She opened it first.

Inside was a plain card with no text and floral print on the outside. The inside had two lines of handwritten script:

_Apologies for the intrusion. You have a beautiful voice._

Melody’s eyes went wide. So there _was_ someone down in the practice rooms that night! Spurred on by curiosity, she opened the small box. At first, she thought the object inside was a silver pocket watch on a chain, a star map engraved on the front, but she was wrong. Upon opening it, she found it was a compass. The chain was long so that it was able to be worn like a pendant.

“I just need a compass…” she murmured, trailing off. How long were they down there listening?!

She put the box with the compass aside and opened the envelope, puling out a sheaf of papers. Staff paper? The script was spidery and a little messy, but she could make it out. Melody squinted at the manuscript, reading through the outlines of… a song?

Someone wrote her a song?

_Don’t hide your face,_

_You cannot erase the pain that stays in your eyes_

_Lay down your guard and show them who you are_

_Behind your disguise_

It felt a little like an answer to the troubles she’d expressed in her other songs, an encouraging voice in the dark. Melody bit her lip to keep down the surge of emotion in her chest. Whoever was down there was clearly kind, and she appreciated it. She only wished she knew who it was.

Ah, well. In the meantime, she took the compass pendant out of its box and hung it around her neck. The heavy weight was comforting. Even if she didn’t know who it was from, she knew someone was on her side.

* * *

A day at the beach was generally supposed to be a relaxing affair, but this was probably the most stressful beach day she’d ever witnessed in her life.

Melody watched the scene from under an umbrella, just trying to get some work done until the photoshoot was over and they could all go for a swim. She had a boogie board handy and was already dressed in a black, cropped rash guard and a bikini bottom, both sporting a stylized floral pattern and perfect for swimming around in the waves. However, she wouldn’t be able to swim until after the photoshoot, and it didn’t look like the shoot was going to happen at this point. At least, not the way the finicky photographer had envisioned.

Even after planning everything for weeks, making certain that every last detail was accounted for, of course the airline had to fuck things up.

Ringo and Ryuya were currently trying to calm the man, who was apparently a self-proclaimed genius and a friend of Shining’s who had photographed Starish and Quartet Night before. He’d requested four female models for the shoot, but their flight was so delayed that they wouldn’t be able to get here till late that night at a minimum. She didn’t quite understand why they needed female models, but maybe it was a fanservice thing? In any case, Ringo was not at all successful in trying to convince him to work without any additional models, and Ryuya couldn’t reason with him, either.

“Where’s the little composer girl? She’s cute. She can step in,” the photographer said, looking around for Haruka. He found her easily, dragging her over towards the shoot area.

Of course. Melody wasn’t surprised at all about that, and Haruka did look adorable in her frilly swimwear. As the composer walked over, Melody was about to go back to her notebook, but the photographer caught her attention.

“Oh, and you! You’ll work.”

Melody looked to her left.

Looked to her right.

“… _Me_?”

“Yeah! You look perfect for the water shots. Grab your board and go out there.”

“Is that really the best idea?” She looked to Ringo and Ryuya for confirmation, but they only shrugged.

Grumbling, Melody put down her notebook and did as the photographer asked, jogging out towards the waves. She stopped just as her feet hit the water, the breeze throwing locks of her dark curls into her face.

“What exactly am I supposed to _do_?”

“You know them, right? Just play around and I’ll get some shots. We want to get them having fun at the beach for the release of the summer album, so don’t stress too much. Having the composer and the manager will be great for PR, too, and we can actually show your faces.”

“I’m not the mana— ahh!” Melody started to protest, but she was thwarted when someone picked her up from behind and threw her over their shoulder, rushing out into the waves without hesitation.

“Come on, pipsqueak!”

“Ran, you _ass_!” Melody couldn’t stop from laughing, though. He ran into the water until her feet dangled in the ocean and tossed her off his shoulder into the waves with a splash. She surfaced only a moment later, splashing back in retaliation.

“Yeah, that’s great!” The photographer waved from the shore, flashing a thumbs up in their direction.

It didn’t take long for Otoya to join them, rushing into the waves without hesitation with Reiji and Natsuki. Melody rode in a few waves and tossed a ball back and forth with them for a while, mostly listening to the photographer’s direction. She hoped that the majority of the shots would _not_ be of her, but only time would tell. After an hour of water shots, from which some of the group members abstained (namely Cecil, though Melody convinced the photographer that shots in the shallows would work just as well), they took a break to dry off and moved on to the land shots.

Haruka joined in a game of volleyball while Melody flopped down on the shore, letting the waves wash over her legs. Masato, Tokiya, and Cecil were also in on the game, though it looked like they weren’t getting competitive just yet. They might after Haruka left, especially if someone like Camus or Ren joined in.

“Somehow I’m glad they told me to do the water shots,” she said with a smile, glancing over towards the volleyball game. “I hate sand.”

“You’re also a massive klutz,” Ranmaru pointed out.

“Hey!”

“Okay, you’re not a massive klutz, you’re just the most danger prone woman I’ve ever met in my life.”

“Well, at least we’ve got that one straight.” Melody leaned back on her elbows and let the sun hit her face, the photographer nearly forgotten. He was over getting volleyball shots, anyways, and his only assistant with a camera was… somewhere? Eh. Didn’t matter.

“You need more sun, my lady. You’re as pale as Icchi,” Ren joked, taking a seat next to them.

“I don’t exactly have time to sunbathe on a regular basis.” Melody rolled her eyes. “I’ll have a tan after today, though. Well, on _parts_ of my body.” Her long-sleeved rash guard kept her arms, shoulders, and back protected from the sun, though her stomach and legs were bare.

“I think she needs a new swimsuit. What do you think, Ran?” Ren asked, winking. Ranmaru raised an eyebrow.

“I think it would be dangerous for my health to respond to that question.”

“Smart move,” Melody deadpanned, glaring at Ren. “Haruka’s got the frilly swimsuit department covered. If I can’t swim in the ocean in it, I’m not wearing it.”

“Hmm. A shame. I can think of several people here who—”

Ranmaru reached over and shoved Ren to the side, causing him to tumble down the sand into an incoming wave. He hardly seemed bothered, though, laughing as he stood. Water dripping from his _somehow_ still perfectly styled hair made a lovely shot for the photographer, too.

“Still hamming it up, I see,” Melody muttered, smiling.

“You know, I’d be happy to dunk him in the ocean if you want,” Ranmaru offered.

“Nah, it’s fine. He’s like… the little brother I always wanted,” she said with a snort.

“Well, if you’re sure. You might be a pipsqueak, but you’re ours now. We’ll take care of you.” He patted her shoulder gently, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

“Thanks, Ran.” Melody leaned against his side for a moment, shoulder to shoulder as they stared out at the waves. “Hey… does everyone think I’m your manager?”

“Yep.”

“You didn’t even _hesitate_!” she squawked, eyes wide.

“That’s because they _do_ , dumbass.” Ranmaru elbowed her in the side, rolling his eyes. “I know you take care of all the scheduling and promotions for the solo idols, too, but you travel with us more often than anyone, and you’re always backstage while Shining sits in the audience.”

“I’m comfier backstage,” she protested.

“Only you would rather be in the chaos than out sitting in peace watching the show.”

“You mean where I can fix something if shit hits the fan? Yeah, I would rather be there.”

* * *

 **Van:** How’s the beach, cutie?

 **Me:** It’s been nice. Stressful, but we did get to relax a little. Promo shoot went well, mostly.

 **Van:** I bet you looked adorable out there <3 Wish I could have seen it

 **Me:** Flattery will get you nowhere, but thanks, anyways. They made me step in for the photoshoot and it was… weird.

 **Van:** WHAT? I’ll definitely look for those promo pics now

 **Me:** The photographer also thinks I’m their manager, apparently

 **Van:** That’s not surprising

 **Van:** Most people think you’re their manager, I think. Or maybe their sister.

 **Me:** Sister?!

 **Van:** Doesn’t Otoya call you big sister?

 **Me:** …

 **Me:** … Maybe.

 **Van:** Mmm-hmm.

 **Van:** Why is that such a problem for you, though? I don’t get it

 **Me:** It’s just… not my job, I guess. I do other things.

 **Van:** Whatever you say. You do what a manager does, though

 **Me:** It’s late. I should get to bed.

 **Van:** Sweet dreams <3

Regardless of the stress of the day before, sitting on the beach at night made everything feel small. Lying on a towel rolled out on the sand, Melody gazed up at the stars, putting her phone to the side for a moment. Her hair was still damp from her shower, and instead of professional clothing or a swimsuit, she wore a pair of shorts and a loose tank top. She probably should go to bed, but she wasn’t sleepy. She just didn’t want to talk any more, and Van was nice, but he made her feel… conflicted.

She wondered if he expected something from her. He kept saying that he didn’t, that he didn’t mind taking things slow or keeping things casual, but something felt unsettled in Melody’s chest. She wasn’t sure if she wanted _him_ or if it just felt nice to be wanted by someone, and until she figured it out, she didn’t want to do anything to make him think she was willing to risk her newfound home or his career on a romance.

“You’re out late.”

Melody jumped, gasping a little. She hadn’t heard anyone approach, but only a moment later, Masato sat down in the sand beside her.

“So are you,” Melody said pointedly, taking a deep breath to lower her heart rate. She tucked her phone back in her tote bag as discreetly as she could, though Masato had probably already seen it.

“I wanted to see the stars. They’re so clear out here.”

“No light pollution, yeah.” Melody nodded, turning her eyes towards the sky. “I like stargazing, but I don’t do it very often. I used to.”

“Is that why there are stars on your pendant?” Masato asked, gesturing to the compass that Melody wore around her neck. She’d almost forgotten she put it on.

“Oh. No, actually…” she paused. “Masato, you haven’t been down to the practice rooms at night recently, have you?”

“I… ah…” He fumbled, and even in the darkness Melody could see his cheeks turning red. “I was there one night when I couldn't sleep, a couple of weeks back... but otherwise, no.”

Melody squinted in the darkness, leaning a little closer. “Has anyone ever told you that you’re an awful liar?”

“I’m not lying!” he protested, holding up his hands. “It’s just that… I saw you. Practicing.” Masato winced. It took a moment for Melody to process what he was talking about. She hadn’t been playing piano when she saw Masato. That was after—

 _Fuck_.

“You watched…?” Melody breathed. “Oh, no, you saw me fall, didn’t you? Shit.” She covered her face with her hands, shaking her head. How stupid!

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but I didn’t want to pry. I thought you might be practicing at night for a reason. Are you feeling better after that fall?”

“My hip was covered in a massive bruise for a week, but It’s better now,” Melody said, nodding. “Does… anyone else use the practice rooms late?”

“Did you see someone?” Masato blinked, frowning.

“No. I… Well, I think I heard someone, and I’m trying to figure out who it was.” She chose to leave out the details about the compass and the song for now. If it wasn’t him, she didn’t want to ask around much. If possible, it would be better to figure it out on her own. It had to be someone who lived in the building. There was a small possibility it could be one of the staff members, but they didn’t normally come in for cleaning or maintenance until around 8 in the morning.

“Did you, um, happen to mention to anyone that you saw me?” Melody asked hesitantly, both a little curious and trying to change the subject.

“No, I didn’t. Though, I admit I’m curious why you wouldn’t book studio time during the day. You make the schedules, so you’d know when we’re in there.”

“I’m… not quite ready for people to know about me yet,” she said with a sigh. “Then again, I guess that’s failed. What did Tokiya tell you?”

“Tokiya? No, I heard from Ran.” Masato looked utterly perplexed, brushing a stray lock of hair out of his face as he turned towards her.

“I may as well give up at this point.” Melody flopped down on her back with a groan, staring up at the stars while she lay on her beach towel. A moment later she scooched to the side, leaving half the large towel empty. “Come on. You don’t have to sit in the sand.”

She patted the spot beside her on the towel.

“I—ah—um—” he stuttered, looking around for something she clearly couldn’t see.

“Come on. I’m sure it’ll be more comfortable. The view’s better and you won’t get sand all over you.”

Melody crossed her arms over her chest, staring up at the stars as she tried to calm her heart rate. Masato shuffled around for a moment before she felt the warm pressure of his shoulder against hers. It was comforting, in a way, though he felt a little tense. She wasn’t entirely sure why, unless he was still feeling guilty about discovering her practicing.

“What do you want to know?” she asked softly, keeping her eyes on the stars. They _were_ brighter out here. Masato was silent for a long moment before he finally responded.

“Why does it matter to you if we know?”

She sighed, biting her lip. It mattered. Should it? She didn’t really know any more. She wanted to forget the past and move on, but that wasn’t working out particularly well for her. A fresh start was nearly impossible around a bunch of curious idols, apparently. Melody reached over in the darkness and found his hand, squeezing it tightly for a moment. Masato gasped softly, but he didn’t pull away.

“I wanted a fresh start. I wanted to forget, and it’s hard to forget when other people know. It’s even harder when those other people are out succeeding at what you utterly failed at.” She chuckled wryly, shaking her head. It was, perhaps, a little silly to feel so self-conscious, but she did.

“You’re still practicing, though.”

“I still love it,” she admitted, “but I love it on my own, when there’s no one there. I love it when no one can see me, and when I don’t have to worry about what they think or how they feel, or who I’m supposed to be besides myself.”

“So you’re just giving up music?” Masato asked incredulously, his hold on her hand suddenly very tight.

“No!” Melody protested. “No, I don’t want to give it up. I just… don’t know where to go from here, and I don’t know if performing is a good career choice for me.” Not with the panic and the stage fright, not with the stage personas. All the adrenaline in the world couldn’t make up for that, and all the smiling audience members couldn’t make her feel okay at the end of the night.

“Have you considered composing?” Masato shifted slightly and let her hand go, propped up on his elbow as he looked at her.

“I… no, actually.” Melody frowned, brow furrowing. She hadn’t really considered it an option, though she’d done well in all her music theory courses and enjoyed writing her own songs. It seemed a little late to get into that, though.

“Well, in the meantime, if you’d ever like a dance partner, I’ll be around. D—during the day, that is.” Masato quickly rolled onto his back again, avoiding her eyes. It was adorable, in a way. He was normally so stoic, but he was really quite shy and very kind.

“Thank you.” Melody couldn’t help but smile, despite feeling a little shy, herself. “Hey, you don’t happen to know anyone living in the dorms that gets up really early, do you? Or keeps weird hours?”

“Ah… the first ones that come to mind would be Ranmaru, Syo, and Tokiya. Ran and Syo work out in the mornings, and Tokiya gets up to go jogging,” Masato said softly. A pause. “Though, I suppose any of us have been known to get up especially early sometimes. I’ll cook breakfast most mornings, and sometimes Ren goes out to jog. Reiji’s hours are unpredictable at best, and Cecil could be up half the night in a tree talking to fireflies without anyone knowing.”

… Great.

That brought the list down from eleven to… Well, maybe seven. Ai and Camus were the only ones who really kept respectable hours on a regular basis, and were only up and at the practice rooms that early if their schedules required it. Otoya wasn’t an early riser, and she’d already ruled out Masato. The rest? At best, a habitual early riser who might have taken a side trip downstairs. At worst, entirely unpredictable. She’d just have to feel them out individually and ask, preferably without raising any suspicion.

She shouldn’t be this concerned with finding whoever dropped off the package, but it was really eating at her. Part of it was natural curiosity: Melody wanted to know because she simply wanted to know. Part of it, she couldn’t deny, was embarrassment. Another part of her just wanted to know who had written that song.

For now, she took a deep breath of the salty air and tried to let the sound of the waves and the sight of the night sky calm her heart. Everything felt too big and too small all at once, but perhaps the morning would bring some answers.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIVE! I need to finish this. We'll see how it goes.


	10. In Which Melody Attends A Wedding

Lunch with Tokiya turned out to be harder to schedule than they planned, but they did manage to make it work. It was a nice break for both of them, and though this was only the third week that they’d met up, she found herself looking forward to it. This week, they went to a local café that they’d both been meaning to try, and found themselves with some rare spare time afterwards.

“We should take the long way back. Go through the park,” Melody suggested.

“That sounds nice. Is this the park where you sketch?”

“Yep! We should come here sometime, or at least sit and draw together a little.”

“Is there anything you don’t do?” Tokiya asked with a laugh.

“Says arguably the most multitalented person I’ve ever met, Mr. ‘I play seven instruments, but I only ever use them when I want to surprise people.’” Melody mimicked his voice a little as she spoke, which he did not find funny.

“I do _not_ sound like that.”

“Mmmmm maybe a little.”

“No.”

Melody just smiled as they walked through the park, playfully bickering all the way. He was fun to banter with, a side of him that very few people ever saw. Tokiya likely wouldn’t banter with anyone during his professional gigs, and if he did, it wasn’t for long. Seeing him metaphorically let his hair down was a treat, and she enjoyed having someone who was just as blunt and sarcastic as she was to talk to. When she talked to Tokiya, Melody knew that he wouldn’t sugar coat things or tell her something to make her feel better that simply wasn’t true. He was honest. His sarcasm also flew over people’s heads sometimes, which she could relate to.

Walking through the park in the sunshine was also a treat. She snapped a few pictures of birds or trees or lighting that she liked while they walked, slowly making their way to the other side and enjoying the day. The nice weather wouldn’t last long— winter always came far sooner than she expected, and she wanted to appreciate it while she could.

“You are a massive walking contradiction. You know that, right?”

“Hey, respect your elders! Don’t call me out on my oxymoronic existence.” Melody laughed, elbowing him in the side.

“I’m not _that_ much younger than you.” For a moment, Tokiya almost looked like he was pouting.

“You’re what… twenty?” Melody’s brow furrowed as she attempted to remember. “Shit. No. Nineteen—good lord, I keep forgetting you’re still a teenager.”

“I’m going to choose to take that as a compliment,” he grumbled.

“It is. Let’s go this way.” She grabbed his hand to steer him down a shady, secluded path through the park, overshadowed by a tunnel made of rhododendron branches. Tokiya made a small noise of surprise, but he didn’t pull away. In fact, when she loosened her grip to let go, he kept his hold.

Melody stared at their hands for a moment, suddenly feeling a little warm despite the shade. When she glanced up at Tokiya, his gaze was very pointedly straight ahead.

“Are you ready for the concert coming up?” Melody asked, fumbling for anything to say. Anything at all.

“We’ve all done our best to prepare. It should be a fantastic event, if a little exhausting. I sincerely hope the weather holds, though.”

The release of the summer albums was a three-day event at a local beach that featured several headlining solo idols from Shining Agencies as well as Starish and Quartet Night. New songs premiered at a concert each night, and the event culminated in a huge beach concert at sunset on the third evening. Shining maintained that it wouldn’t rain with an eerie, stubborn kind of confidence that only someone like him could pull off, but Melody didn’t believe it for a second. They picked the day months in advance, and there was no way to know for sure.

“I’ve got a backup plan if it doesn’t, don’t worry.”

“We can always count on you,” Tokiya said with a small smile. “Odd that being Shining’s assistant seems to work out well when you second guess all his plans.”

Melody snorted, nodding. “Yeah, you have a point there. It probably looks strange when everyone just goes with what he wants, and then the person who’s supposed to be working most directly with him refuses to go along with it.”

“Not strange. Smart.” As they exited the tunnel and stepped into the sunlight, he finally dropped her hand. Oddly, Melody missed the comfort of having him close, but she couldn’t risk being seen that close to any of the idols in public. A secluded, empty park path was one thing. A public street was something else entirely. “Speaking of looking strange, have you noticed anything… _off_ about Haruka lately?”

Oh, dear.

Well, it wasn’t as though Haruka didn’t ask her to talk to him in the first place. Apparently flirting wasn’t working out so well for her, if Tokiya noticed something was out of place. There was no good way to broach the subject, so she simply charged into the topic as they continued their way down the street.

“Ugh, this is awkward,” Melody mumbled, rubbing her temples. “Haruka, if you haven’t noticed, has a massive crush on you.”

“I’ve noticed,” Tokiya said, sighing.

Melody couldn’t tell if there was regret in his voice or not. He was certainly carefully neutral about it. Did he just want to protect his career and his contract? If so, Melody couldn’t really blame him. She would probably do the same in his position. Hell, she would do the same _now_. As draining as it was, she liked her job, and she wasn’t about to chance it on a crush or a fling or something that she didn’t know for sure would last, which… Well, probably meant she’d either marry a teacher at the school or die alone, considering most of the people she interacted with were idols under the same kinds of contracts as Tokiya. Either was fine, though. Besides, dying alone was a myth. Not having a romance didn’t make you alone.

“Oh.” A pause. “Well, I… may have insinuated she should try flirting and see if you responded,” Melody said with a wince. That would definitely explain any odd behavior as the poor girl tried to navigate how to flirt.

 “Did she say something to you?” He raised an eyebrow, curious, as he glanced towards Melody. She avoided his eyes, shaking her head.

“She’s being… an eighteen-year-old,” Melody said with a sigh. “She wanted me to talk to you because she knows I spend time with you all pretty regularly now, but I didn’t think it was a good idea for me to play wingman. Wingwoman.” Melody’s nose wrinkled as she thought about the prospect.

“She’s not that much younger than you,” Tokiya pointed out. Melody just scoffed.

“Yeah, and I’ve had three years of work experience and being out in the world away from school that she hasn’t had. She’s never had to pay bills or work a shitty job just because it covers the rent for that month, and I presume she’s never had a romance, so she doesn’t know how to approach it besides like any nervous teenager. Haruka is a sweet girl and she’s good at what she does, but the maturity gap is… _large_.” She let out a long breath. There were few ways to put those words that sounded nice, but she simply hoped Tokiya knew that it wasn’t a slight against their composer.

“I’d be inclined to agree with you. I care about Haruka, I’m grateful for all her help in establishing our group, and she’s a very talented composer, but...” He trailed off. “Well, perhaps if she’d been a year or two earlier.” Melody wasn’t certain if he was lying or trying to throw her off track, or if he was really telling the truth. That was one thing about Tokiya: when he really wanted to hide something, if it was truly important, he could keep it hidden for as long as he wanted.

“What would you have done? A year earlier, I mean,” Melody asked softly. She fiddled with the hem of her jacket absently, just trying to keep her hands busy.

“Are you asking because of Van?” There was a strange edge to his voice, like a warning, but Melody chose not to ask him about it.

“Yes? No? I don’t know,” she grumbled, frowning. “I think he likes me more than I like him. Not that I don’t like him as, you know, a _person_. I just don’t know if I’m ready to jump into the kind of romance that would probably be.”

“I can’t speak for Van. His personality is very different from mine, and I don’t presume to know him as well as I do Eiji or even Kira.” Tokiya paused, suddenly meeting her eyes. “I think it would have to be someone very important for me to take that risk. I won’t say I couldn’t be convinced, but she would have to be very special.”

Something in her chest gave a painful lurch, and she looked away.

“I wish he was as easy to read as you,” Melody mumbled, suddenly feeling a little shy. When she glanced over, Tokiya looked like he’d swallowed a lemon.

“I highly doubt I’m as easy to read as you think,” he muttered.

“I can tell when you haven’t eaten lunch, Toki,” Melody deadpanned. She slipped her arm through his, linking their elbows as they walked along the drive that led up to the agency. “You’re just a loveable sarcastic little shit when you’re not in your professional persona. And a giant nerd.”

“You just think you can placate me with books and granola bars, don’t you?” he sighed, but he didn’t move away from her.

“On the contrary: I _know_ I can placate you with books and granola bars.”

“You’re just as easily placated with books and popcorn,” he shot back.

“Oh, fie, he’s discovered my darkest secret!” Melody gasped melodramatically, placing her free hand over her heart for a moment. Tokiya rolled his eyes, but he laughed at her antics despite himself.

“You’re ridiculous.”

“You love it. We all need a little comic relief every now and then,” she said with a smile.

They walked along in silence for another block or so, enjoying the sunshine and the company, and Melody was surprised that the lack of conversation wasn’t awkward. It felt comfy, natural, and even pleasant to be with someone that didn’t make her feel like she needed to speak.

When they were nearly back to the agency, Tokiya finally spoke up, glancing over at her curiously.

“… What would you do from your side of the situation?”

“I…” She paused, thinking through her words carefully. There was no need for any other preface. She knew what he meant. “I think, no matter how much I wanted them, I couldn’t ask someone to risk that for me. It would have to be their choice. So… I don’t think I would say anything, if I’m being honest about it.”

“Suffer in silence?”

“I’ve had worse,” she said with a shrug.

“Worse than silently pining for weeks or months till it fades?”

“Silently pining while encouraging your best friend to go after the person you want.”

“Why would you do that?”

“I wanted her to be happy,” Melody said wistfully. “Plus, he obviously wasn’t interested in me, so it’s fine. It’s happened to a lot of people before, I’m sure, and if that’s my most scarring romantic experience, I’m honestly pretty lucky.”

“You keep claiming that you’re a pessimist, but you’re obviously lying.”

“I’m a realist,” she corrected. “If you ever want to make that choice, I’d support you, you know. I’ll keep your dark romantic secrets for you.” She meant it as a gentle tease, but Tokiya pulled away as they approached the doors, suddenly serious.

“… Melody,” he said carefully, holding eye contact for a long moment.

“Yes?” She paused with her hand on the door like a deer in the headlights, wondering what else he could want to say. Had she crossed a line somewhere? He didn’t look offended, though, only concerned.

“Be careful around Van. I don’t want to see you hurt.”

Bless him. Melody smiled softly and nodded, happy that he cared enough to be concerned.

“I will.”

* * *

Shawl clasped tightly around her shoulders, Melody hurried down the stairs and out to the lobby, ready to meet Reiji so they could travel to the wedding. Luckily, the event was local, so they wouldn’t need to worry about finding a hotel anywhere. Reiji would drive and they’d simply get back late after the reception.

“You look lovely,” Reiji said, smiling brightly. He took her hand and kissed it softly, and then took off towards the front of the dorms, where his car was parked.

“When I said ‘text me about the dress code,’ I didn’t mean ‘send me a dress,’” Melody mumbled, blushing. The delivery was outside her door when she woke up that morning, bleary-eyed and very confused to see a box containing an evening dress waiting on her. It was dark green with a halter v neck and a low back, the flared skirt ending just below the knee.

“It looks gorgeous, just like I knew it would.” Reiji opened the passenger door for her, still sporting that same, casual smile, and Melody slid inside.

“Now you’re just trying to butter me up!” It felt like her entire face was on fire, but she didn’t dare make a move to cover her cheeks so that her makeup wouldn’t smudge. “… You look nice, too.”

Reiji’s gray suit matched her shawl, and his tie was the same green as her dress. He really did look quite dashing, though it was a more serious look than even his professional outfits for Quartet Night gigs.

“Why thank you. I thought it would be nice if we matched, since you’re my date.” He winked jovially before starting the vehicle. Melody fumbled through buckling her seatbelt and kept her eyes on the road, trying to focus on anything but Reiji.

“You think they’ll be okay without us?” Melody asked with a soft laugh. Reiji was the oldest of the group, and she wasn’t quite the oldest, but probably the most responsible of the ones left. Camus, Cecil, and Otoya would be back late as well, off filming a commercial. Out of the ones left, hopefully Tokiya, Masato, or Haruka would be able to corral them if needed.

“Oh, they’ll be fine. If anything, they just wish they could go to the wedding, too.”

Reiji sounded casual, but something about his tone set of warning bells.

“You _told_ them I agreed to be your fake girlfriend?” She raised an eyebrow, desperately hoping he hadn’t. Or maybe hoping he had. At least that would clarify the situation! She trusted the boys to be discreet about it, whatever they thought, but she didn’t need Reiji implying things that weren’t true when the tabloids were doing that for her already.

“Not exactly. I told them you were my date to a wedding. I chose not to elaborate.”

“I’m not sure if that’s better or worse, actually.”

It could really swing both ways, and only time would tell.

* * *

The wedding was a beautiful affair, and even less stressful than Melody feared. Reiji purposefully arrived almost late and sat in the back, and Melody thought that might be on purpose, so as not to gather too much unwanted attention. The ceremony was short, and the bride looked just like Reiji when she smiled. It was easy to tell they were related.

The reception… was another affair entirely.

For the past hour, Reiji half dragged Melody around the room as they were tossed from family member to family member. Everyone was very supportive and excited to meet Reiji’s girlfriend, which truthfully made the whole thing even worse. By the time dinner had been served, she was eaten up with guilt over the whole situation. To his credit, considering it was his idea, Reiji handled everything gracefully. However, she didn’t know how he planned to handle telling them about the breakup afterwards, considering all the smiles on his family members’ faces.

“Okay, everyone, it’s time for the bouquet toss!”

Melody watched from their table at the side of the room as most of the women in the room moved towards where the bride stood on a small stage, microphone in hand. She had absolutely no intention of moving, and she didn’t typically enjoy participating in bouquet tosses, anyways. There were too many little girls who were disappointed that they didn’t catch it, and too many grown women scrambling over flowers. However…

“Oh, come on, let’s go!” Another of Reiji’s cousins, Aoi, took her by the hand and pulled Melody along towards the crowd before she could protest. A glance back at Reiji confirmed that he was just bemused by the whole situation.

Melody reluctantly joined the crowd, but stood to the side and towards the back. With luck, the flowers wouldn’t go her way, and the crowd of unmarried girls and bridesmaids could scramble for it elsewhere.

It looked like the bride overestimated the toss, or perhaps she was just uncoordinated, because it flew high and wide of where the majority of the women were standing. A few of them backed up, but couldn’t quite move to catch it in time, and neither could Melody…

Because it smacked her in the face as it fell.

It felt into her hands with a shower of petals, leaving Melody blinking and stuttering, staring at the flowers as the sound of distant applause and cheers rang in her ears. She blushed awkwardly, looking around for some of the younger children in the crowd.

“Come here, girls,” Melody said softly, kneeling. She avoided the eyes of the other adults in the room as she divided the flowers among the little girls, who all seemed quite pleased. By the time she’d finished that task, the music started again, and Melody made her way back across the ballroom to go and sit by Reiji.

Before she could take a seat, he pulled her chair as close to his as possible and grabbed her hand, tugging her towards him so he could wrap his arm around her waist as they watched the dancing.

“So, when are we hearing wedding bells?” Reiji’s aunt asked, laughing.

“I— um— ah—”

“We aren’t thinking about that right now,” Reiji said smoothly, even as he quite blatantly pulled her closer, her hip pressed against his. “It’s better to take things one day at a time with our career tracks.”

“Are you a singer, too, then?” his uncle asked.

“I—”

“She composes. She’s been taking time off, but she’s very good.” Reiji winked, and Melody had to fight not to glare at him.

“Well, best of luck to the both of you. I’m sure it’ll work itself out in the end.” Reiji’s uncle patted his shoulder gently, and Melody’s heart broke. They had all been so wonderful and kind, and she could tell that coming from a kind and supportive family had helped to make Reiji the person he was. How could she keep lying to them? And how could she not? She was here to help Reiji, and she’d follow through with it.

“Come on. Dance with me.” Reiji held out a hand to her, and she didn’t have it in her heart to deny him.

He was an excellent dancer. Melody didn’t expect any less after watching him on stage— he was graceful and charismatic, drawing eyes even among the crowd at the reception. It was easy to tell why he’d wanted to sit in the back and stick to the edges of the crowd now. He didn’t want to draw attention away from the bride and groom. However, the bride and groom were off speaking to the guests, and there was nothing to keep him from enjoying himself to the fullest.

They whirled around the ballroom with the ease of a practiced couple, though Melody had never danced with him before. She felt surefooted and graceful, trusting him to hold her weight for the turns and following his lead around the room.

“Are you having fun?” he asked quietly, pulling her in close. His fingers ever so slightly brushed the bare skin of her back.

“It’s been a nice evening.” And it had, truly. Melody liked weddings in essentially any context, and Reiji’s family was nice. If she could help him out by doing this, she didn’t mind, though… Lying didn’t sit very well with her.

“Thank you for helping me.”

“You’re welcome. You’re my friend, and I care about you.”

He hugged her, then, pulling her close to his chest and resting his head on hers. Hugs from Reiji were always the best. No one quite knew why, but they all agreed. He did so much for all of them, and Melody could handle a little guilt if it would help him out.

However, she wasn’t expecting that when the hug ended, he took her hand and led her to the far side of the ballroom. His mother, who she’d met earlier, sat at a table on the opposite side from where they’d been.

“Hello, honey,” the older woman said joyfully. “Are you heading out soon? I know you need to be back tonight.”

“Soon, but… I have a confession,” Reiji said softly, throwing a glance back at Melody. He took a deep breath and put his hands in his pockets. “I’ve been thinking, and wanted to clear things up before I leave. Melody isn’t my girlfriend. She’s just a friend of mine, and she works for Shining Agencies, just like I do. She was kind enough to come along with me today when I asked.”

“Why didn’t you just _tell_ us, honey?” his mother asked, shaking her head. Only a moment later, she pulled her son into her arms, patting his back gently.

“I didn’t want you to worry. You always seemed so upset about me being alone, but… I’m not alone.” Reiji pulled away and smiled in her direction, and Melody walked over to stand with him.

“He’s really not. He’s got a whole family with him,” she said, linking her arm through his.

“Well, if she’s willing to do that for you, she must be one good woman. Maybe you should ask her out anyways,” she said with a laugh. Melody laughed, too. Contract stipulations were not in their favor on that one.

“When I’m ready, I’ll handle it in my own time. I promise. For now, I’m not alone and I’m not lonely.”

“We’ll talk about this later, alright? For now, just know I’m not angry. I just wish you’d told me sooner.” She patted Reiji’s cheek gently before she turned to Melody. “It was still nice to meet you, dear.”

“And you as well. I’m sorry I lied to you,” Melody said sincerely, bowing her head. “I do think Reiji is a wonderful person. That wasn’t a lie at all.”

“I’m glad to know he has people like you around him.” Her eyes looked just like her son’s when she smiled. There was something youthful and mischievous about them despite her graying hair and the small smile wrinkles hear her eyes.

“Come on, Mels. Let’s go.” Reiji took her hand gently and guided her towards the exit.

“Shouldn’t we say goodbye to your cousin?” she asked quietly, looking over at where the bride and groom stood. He shook his head, though, continuing towards the door.

“I already spoke to her, and I wouldn’t want to interrupt them.”

“You do have a way of drawing crowds,” she mused. It wasn’t until they were out the door and in the quiet of the parking area that she asked the question that was really on her mind, though. “Why did you decide to tell them the truth?”

“It wasn’t fair to you.” He sighed softly, slowing his pace as he turned to look at her. “You’ve done so much for me, but I could see you were getting uncomfortable, and… I know they just want me to be happy, but you were right. I need to convince them that I’m fine on my own for now.”

“I’m proud of you, Reiji.” Melody squeezed his hand gently for just a moment, meeting his eyes. The moment didn’t last as she turned to open the passenger door of the car, though.

“Mels?”

“Hm?”

She turned back, looking towards him just in time to feel the soft brush of dark hair against her skin, and the soft pressure of a kiss on her cheek. Melody froze as he pulled away, a small, sincere smile on his face.

“You’re the best.”

He didn’t wait on her response as he walked around to the other side of the vehicle. It wouldn’t take them too long to make their way back to the agency, and Melody somehow wished it would be a little longer. Maybe it would give her more time to think over the night.

 


	11. In Which Melody Acquires More Blackmail Material

By the time Melody and Reiji made it back to the agency, it was well past 2AM. Luckily, he had the good grace to drop her off at the doors while he parked, because the scene they found inside was not something the residents would want both of them to see at once.

Ranmaru, Tokiya, and Ren lounged around downstairs, obviously in the aftermath of a group game night. Ranmaru had his feet up on the coffee table while Tokiya and Ren say on the sofa, staring at an abandoned Monopoly game board. A bowl of punch and several bags of salty snacks rested on a large table at the side of the room, half demolished but not yet cleaned. It all looked fairly normal, if a little messy, when Melody walked in, shawl hanging over one arm and surveying the room.

“Have… fun?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

 “We did. You look lovely. Tell her she looks lovely.” Ren nodded towards Melody, looking back and forth between Ranmaru and Tokiya. Ranmaru simply nodded once, politely.

“How did it go?” he asked.

“Oh, fine. I’m sure Reiji will give you the details later.” She paused, looking to where Tokiya sat, though he seemed… grumpy? Sleepy? Something looked off. “Hey, Toki, you’re a little quiet…” she said carefully, walking just a little closer.

“Fine,” he said flatly.

“What’s wrong with him?” Melody crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for a response from either of the others in the room.

“He’s fine,” Ren said with a shrug, draping an arm over Tokiya’s shoulders.

“I’m fine,” Tokiya agreed, but he leaned against Ren, head resting against his shoulder and eyelids drooping, and Melody knew something was off.

“You’re lying.

“He… might be a little drunk,” Ren admitted.

“He’s _very_ drunk,” Ranmaru clarified, taking a noncommittal sip of his own drink. “And it’s made him even pricklier than usual. Either that or he’s annoyed and won’t say why. Haven’t figured it out yet.”

“I am _not_ drunk,” Tokiya protested, but he was a second too late on the response to claim that he was sober. Melody opened her mouth. Closed it. Continued to flap her jaws like a codfish for long enough to contain herself before she finally spoke through gritted teeth, though she grew louder with every word.

“I leave you all alone for one _fucking_ evening and come back to this?!” Melody gestured around the room. “Is this what you do when there aren’t any girls here?” Haruka was off with Camus and Cecil.

Ren just shrugged. “To be honest, we probably would have done it even if Haruka were here. It’s you we have to be wary of.”

“Again, not sure if that’s a compliment or an insult,” she grumbled. “Where’s Masa, anyways? And Natsuki?”

“They went to bed hours ago. Lightweights, the both of them,” Ren said with a shrug, taking another sip of his drink. “And _that one_ needed to relax. He’s too tense all the time. It’s not healthy.”

“… You gave alcohol to your underage band members?” Melody spoke slowly, trying to keep her temper under control. “And _you_ didn’t put a stop to it?” She gestured to Ranmaru, hands on her hips.

“They were safe! We weren’t driving and we all sleep in this building, and there’s no one dangerous around,” Ren protested. “Besides, he’s only two months underage.”

“I got here twenty minutes ago,” Ranmaru said helplessly.

“I… Okay, you get a slight reprieve for the fact that you’re here and not partying elsewhere, and _that alone_ ,” she conceded. If they were going to drink, at least they did it in a safe environment. “How the hell did you get _Tokiya and Masato_ to drink, anyways?!” They were the most straight-laced of the bunch by far, and she wasn’t sure how Ren had convinced them to participate in the drinking even on group game night.

“Easy. I didn’t tell them there was alcohol in the punch.” Ren shrugged as if it was the most obviously explanation in the world. “Well, not until they’d had enough that Masato was ready to go and sleep it off, and Tokiya didn’t believe me because he didn’t feel any of the effects. They hit him about twenty minutes ago. Not sure if he regrets it or not— he’s been grumpy, but it might just be loss of a filter. A little touchy, too, which is fun.”

“How much has he had?” Melody shook her head, walked to the punch bowl, and ladled herself a plastic cup full of what appeared to be some kind of concoction with pineapple juice, cinnamon, and… probably vodka. She glanced under the table, pulling aside the tablecloth to reveal two empty bottles. Ah. A _lot_ of vodka.

“Four or fi— _what_ are you doing?” Ren asked, blinking as she downed the cup in one go.

“I didn’t have anything but the champagne for the toast at the wedding, and I’m gonna need it to deal with this,” Melody said, helping Tokiya to his feet. He mumbled something unintelligible as he stood. “Okay, come on, Toki. You’re going to bed.”

“The rest of us don’t get an escort?” Ren pouted dramatically, batting his eyelashes.

“The rest of you are sober enough to feel my wrath tomorrow morning,” Melody threatened.

Ren visibly jumped, and even Ranmaru looked a little wary. However, she just heaved a sigh and started to guide Tokiya out of the room. At least he hadn’t had that much to drink, so maybe he was just a lightweight and in no real danger of blacking out or even a particularly bad hangover.

She guided him down the hallways, pausing for only a moment before hitting the elevator button. She hadn’t taken an elevator since the day she was trapped in there with Van, and that brought on far too many memories and far too much confusion.

“Stairs,” he mumbled, tugging her to the side. Melody careened to her left and barely managed to catch herself, turning them both around as she moved.

“You can’t take stairs right now,” she shook her head, pulling him firmly towards the elevators. Normally, Tokiya would be able to overpower her, and no doubt he still could, but he went along with it.

“You don’t take elevators now.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll be fine.” She guided him inside the doors with more confidence than she felt.

“You’re insufferable,” Tokiya mumbled, voice muffled against her shoulder as he held on even tighter. “You’re too self-sacrificing and you worry too much. It’s annoying.”

“Gee, thanks,” Melody deadpanned. Her heart rate slowed as the elevator doors opened and they stepped out onto Tokiya’s floor. She guided him towards his room, and he followed without protest, still mumbling.

“You don’t take care of yourself enough, either.”

“Is this your roundabout way of telling me you’re worried?”

“No,” Tokiya pouted. Ah, that meant “yes.”

Melody just focused on opening the door and getting him inside. He didn’t protest, though he stumbled a little when she let him go. Goodness, either he was an incredible lightweight or Ren had put a _lot_ of alcohol in the punch. Possibly both. Actually, now that she thought about it, Melody’s bets were on both. Ren was, for the most part, responsible, and she didn’t think he would ever do anything to intentionally endanger people he cared about, but he was… mischievous.

“What happened with Van?”

Tokiya’s voice was suddenly serious, slightly slurred and a little husky from the alcohol. However, she could see the concern in his eyes for just a moment before she turned away, shaking her head and guiding him towards the bed. He needed to lie down and rest, not to interrogate her about her love life. Besides, she and Van had gone out to a movie again earlier in the week, and it was… Well, it was fine. Maybe a little awkward. Everyone got cold feet at first, didn’t they?

“Nothing.”

“ _Something_ happened,” Tokiya insisted. “You won’t talk, though. Did he…?” He trailed off, blushing and stuttering.

“No! No, no, I don’t know what you’re thinking, but whatever image is in your head is wrong. Just… Just lie down, okay?” Melody wasn’t mentally or emotionally prepared to have this discussion. Not now, and not with him. Not with anyone, really.

“Not till you talk.” He shook his head.

“I’m telling you this because I’m thinking you won’t remember in the morning,” Melody said with a sigh. “Nothing bad happened. He kissed me, and… I liked it. I think. And then I thought about it, and I didn’t, and I feel like I’m caught up in something I’m not supposed to be in.”

“Then stay with us. Here,” he said quietly. His eyes were half lidded with sleep as he reached out to her again, both hands on her shoulders.

“Do you think I’m leaving?”

“I thought about it once. Thought you might have, too. Not happy, maybe.”

Tokiya sat on the edge of his bed, but didn’t release his hold, pulling her with him till they were both propped against the pillows. Melody made a small noise of surprise as Tokiya leaned against her shoulder, eyes closed and arm around her waist. Her face felt a little warm— actually, _all_ of her felt warm. He was like a human furnace!

“I’m going to get you some water—” she began, but he caught her hand and pulled her back.

“Stay.”

Melody slipped on the rug beside his bed as he caught her, tumbling backwards at full force as she careened back onto the bed and into his arms. Instead of sitting against the headboard, Tokiya lay back on the mattress and pulled her close to him. She was glad that he couldn’t see her face as he hugged her from behind, certain that her expression was somewhere between embarrassment and fear.

“T— Tokiya, I don’t—”

“You should sing more,” he murmured, his breath tickling the skin at the nape of her neck. A shiver ran down her spine, and she hoped that Tokiya couldn’t hear her breath hitch. Melody’s mouth hung open as she struggled to process what he’d said. When the weight of his words finally sunk in, her eyes went wide.

“ _What_?” She tried to turn to face him, but he held her firmly in place.

“Your voice. You sound better in real life than… on the…” he trailed off, motioning vaguely with one hand.

Recordings, maybe? They’d heavily autotuned her voice to match the pop sound on her original recordings. “My old songs, you mean?”

“Mmm.” He nodded, nuzzling her neck in the process. Her shoulders tensed from the tickling motion, but when she tried to subtly shift away, she found his grip was still strong. It was… nice, in a way. A strange way. Warm. She didn’t really think Tokiya would hurt her, and even though he was _hugging her in his bed_ , his hands never wandered anywhere past settling firmly around her waist.

“Hey, Tokiya…” Melody whispered.

No response.

“Toki?”

He was asleep.

Shit.

Otoya often complained about Tokiya being a light sleeper, but clearly it was all different when there was alcohol involved. He was out like a light, nuzzled into the crook of her neck and soft hair brushing her skin. The lamp was still on, but it clearly wasn’t bothering him, though it was shining in Melody’s face. Well, at least it would keep her awake long enough to figure out what to do about this situation.

Unfortunately, there didn’t seem to be anything she _could_ do. Tokiya had a vicelike grip even in sleep, and Melody was held hostage as a human teddy bear. She wasn’t in a position to get up enough leverage to pull away, and his hold around her waist was too tight for her to wriggle out. Her heart was beating wildly, but it looked like there was no choice but to stay here for now. Otoya wasn’t due back until morning, which was good, because with luck she could avoid anyone seeing this embarrassing situation.

She didn’t know how long it took to finally doze off, but she did, dropping into a light, dreamless slumber. The lamp in her face didn’t exactly make for a good sleeping situation, but if she was honest with herself… Well… she didn’t so much mind being close to someone. It was nice to feel like she wasn’t alone, even if Tokiya was swelteringly warm against her back and his hair was tickling her skin.

A soft creaking sound woke her in the wee hours of the morning, when the light was barely starting to come in the window.

“Hi, Toki, how was—? Oh. Sorry, wrong room!” Without even a slight question, Otoya turned on his heel, but Melody wasn’t about to let him slip out.

“Otoya!” she hissed. “Get back here and help me!”

“Big sis?!” Otoya bounded into the room suddenly, eyebrows sky high. “What are you _doing_?”

“Long story. Ren spiked his drink and I’m stuck now because he’s dead weight! Get me out!” she hissed, squirming.

“Okay, okay, hang on!”

With help from Otoya, Melody managed to unlatch herself from Tokiya, who was still sleeping like a log. She scrambled free from the bed as the redhead stared, letting out a low whistle.

“He is _really_ out,” he breathed, eyes wide.

“Yeah, I noticed. Thanks, Otoya.” Melody shook herself to wake up her limbs, grateful to be on her feet, though she felt like she could easily fall back into her own bed and sleep again. “I didn’t think you were coming back till later,” she said, stretching. It felt like her entire spine popped back into place, and she rolled her shoulders with a sigh.

“Well, we weren’t, but we ran a little ahead of schedule with the filming, so we caught an early flight,” he explained, flopping down on his own bed.

“Well… sounds like you need some sleep, and I do, too.” Melody yawned just thinking about it, casting a glance over at Tokiya.

“You could just stay here.” Otoya shrugged nonchalantly as Melody bristled.

“What?!” she hissed, incredulous.

“I mean, Toki looked pretty comfy… It’s not like I would tell anyone.”

“He’s drunk. And highly touch-starved, apparently.” She rolled her eyes, turning to go back to her own room.

“He’s worried,” Otoya said softly, a sad smile on his face. “I just don’t think he knows how to tell you.”

“I’ll be fine.” Melody was surprised to find a reassuring tone in her voice that, suddenly, she found she didn’t feel in her heart. She smiled at Otoya briefly and turned to leave, exiting the room as quietly as possible. There were too many questions turning around in her head, and she didn’t get enough sleep to deal with them.

* * *

Several hours later, Melody went back to check on Tokiya. It was just lucky that he didn’t have anything scheduled that day, because pleading the Irish Flu would not look good on his otherwise squeaky clean record. Maybe he’d chosen to continue drinking because he knew the day was free—his first day off in a long while. Melody didn’t think he’d want to spend it hungover, but she was also of the opinion that Tokiya was intelligent enough to know when he was drinking alcohol, or at least that he shouldn’t have been _that_ drunk without some knowledge of it.

Maybe she’d never know. Now probably wasn’t the time to press for information, though she did think it was the time to bring him some painkillers.

She knocked softly on the door, hoping it was loud enough to hear if he was awake. Only a few seconds later, the knob turned. Surprisingly, it was Otoya who opened it.

“He’s awake and he has regrets,” he said flatly.

“Shouldn’t you be sleeping?” Melody asked, frowning.

“I should, but Mr. Grumpy pants makes that tough, and I’m not really all that sleepy.” Otoya shrugged, but the dark circles under his eyes gave him away.

“Look, Otoya, go nap on my couch and bring me the key later, okay?” Melody fished in her pocket for a moment before pressing the key to her apartment into his hand.

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely. There are spare blankets and pillows in the closet. Help yourself. I’ll be back in a few hours.” She smiled reassuringly and made a shooing motion, hoping that he’d shuffle off down the hall. Luckily, this time, he listened.

“You’re the greatest, Mels.” Otoya waved gratefully as he walked towards the stairs.

Now, to deal with the bigger problem at hand.

Melody slipped inside the room and shut the door behind her with a soft click. There was already a glass of water on Tokiya’s bedside table, presumably from Otoya. Painkillers in hand, Melody carefully perched on the edge of Tokiya’s bed, reaching out to carefully touch his shoulder.

“Toki?”

He only made a vague noise of discontent, eyes still firmly shut.

“Ah, you _are_ awake. I brought painkillers, and you need to finish that water,” she urged. Tokiya did roll over at that, his eyes fluttering open. His hair was mussed, and Melody suddenly realized she’d never seen him look quite so tousled before.

“Good morning.” He blinked blearily up at her, and she couldn’t pick out why her cheeks felt warm.

“What do you remember?” she asked softly, rising. She turned slightly away from him, avoiding his eyes. Everything suddenly felt just a little too close, a little too personal.

“Not much, except that I certainly made a fool of myself. I didn’t want you to see me like that.” He groaned, rubbing his eyes as he slowly stood.

“I know you put a lot of work into everything you do— your appearance, your music, your demeanor— and I know you take pride in it,” Melody said slowly, brushing his hair out of his face. “You don’t have to be perfect all the time, though. You’re still you, and I’m not going to think less of you for it.”

Tokiya stared at her incredulously for a moment, and for once she couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Thus, she wasn’t quite expecting it when he reached for her hand and pulled her towards him, catching her in a warm hug.

“Thank you,” he sighed into her hair.

Her heart lurched as she rested her head against his chest, breathing in the subtle smell of vanilla and aftershave. The thought occurred to her that she wouldn’t mind staying here for a long while, and small twinge of panic followed.

No need to panic, she reasoned, brushing it away. She was simply touch-starved and wanting for affection, and it had been a long time since she had anyone she felt like she could casually hug.

“You’re pretty touch-starved, aren’t you?” she teased, stepping away. Her cheeks felt warm, but she tried to ignore that in favor of changing the subject far, far away from whatever path her thoughts were wandering down.

“I— wha— _no_!” he protested, mouth pressed into a thin line.

“Really? Because you were pretty huggy last—”

“We will _never_ speak of that again.”

* * *

Melody went out with Van for dinner later that week. It was a nice place, but twenty minutes after she sat down, she couldn’t remember the name of it, and her mind wasn’t there. It was far away, on Van, replaying every moment they’d had together and going over facts and figures and numbers. It was off thinking about what she would do if she went on another date with him, and where they would go and how she should act and—

“Mels?”

“Huh?” She jumped, suddenly sitting bolt upright. “I’m sorry, that was rude of me.”

“It’s okay. Everything going alright? You seem… stressed,” he said, frowning.

“It’s fine. Just some things at work, you know?”

A lie. A complete and total lie.

“Anything you want to talk about?” he asked kindly.

“Ah… no. Thank you, though. What’s going on with you? How has recording been going?” Melody was eager to change the subject, calling forth a smile from somewhere beyond her current cloud of muggy thoughts.

He was sweet and kind and a perfect gentleman. He teased her, but not too much, and he was so gorgeous that anyone in the nearby vicinity couldn’t help but stare a little. He kissed like an expert and he did everything right that she ever could have asked for, so… Why was she panicking?

Melody went to the bathroom halfway through dinner, chills running down her spine. Everything felt cold and wrong and unreal, and she felt a little nauseous. Something about being here felt _wrong_. She wasn’t supposed to be doing this, or maybe she was, and it was meant to make her realize what the problem was in the first place:

Van was practically perfect.

And she felt nothing for him.

The realization hit her like a lightning bolt, but the aftermath took longer to settle. She didn’t remember what they talked about for the rest of dinner, and she didn’t remember which way they walked out of the restaurant and back to the car, but she did finally come back to reality when he drove up to the front of the dorms. She stepped out of the car, and Van did, too. Perhaps he wanted to say goodbye, or maybe he already knew there was something she needed to say.

Luckily, there was no one at the front of the building at this hour. Melody didn’t particularly want any of the others to witness this. She took a deep breath, steeling herself. He at least deserved to be looked in the eyes when she told him.

“Van, I can’t do this.”

A pause. His shoulders slumped, and to Melody’s surprise, he nodded.

“I already knew that,” he said sadly. “You’ve been walking on eggshells since I kissed you, and you barely spoke the last time we went out. Good thing it was a movie.” Van laughed quietly, but instead of making light of the situation, it made her feel much, much worse.

Melody bit her lip, hanging her head. She couldn’t quite find the words to say, and though his tone was jovial, she could hear the sadness underneath. He knew what was coming.

“I—I’m sorry,” she choked out, tears already running down her cheeks.

“Why are _you_ crying?” Van gently wiped a tear away from her cheek. Melody hadn’t even noticed.

“You’re really nice, and you’ve been great to me, and I really wish I felt something more, but I just… It’s not fair to you. I’m sorry. I never meant to lead you on.” She slumped, shaking her head.

“You didn’t, hon.” He patted her head gently, though Melody could tell he was disappointed. “We’ve gone out on three dates, not for three years. I wanted to try and win you over, but you never told me you were more interested than you really were. The fact that you’re crying right now really cinches it, you know?” He laughed wryly, tucking his hands in his jacket pockets.

“If you’re ever feeling up to it, I really would like to be friends. I like you. I mean, as a person,” she quickly clarified.

“I think I’d like that,” he said, nodding. “And don’t worry. I’m not so attached that you shattered my heart into a hundred pieces… but I’ll admit I’m disappointed. Whoever he is, he’s a lucky guy.”

“What are you talking about?” Melody blinked, nose wrinkling in confusion.

“You are many things, but an actress isn’t one of them. I can tell you’re thinking about someone else.”

“I…” Melody trailed off, shaking her head.

“Oy,” Van sighed, “It must be bad if _you_ don’t even know yet.”

“I really wish you the best. You’re a good person.”

“Hey, don’t talk like we’re never going to see each other again! We’ve got a gig with Starish next month, you know.” He patted her shoulder gently, putting on a cheerful smile. He really did have a good heart.

“I do know,” Melody said with a watery laugh.

“You made the schedule?” Van smiled softly.

“Yep.” She nodded once, biting her lip. “So… I’ll… see you then, I suppose?”

“I’ll see you. Have a good night, Melody.” Van opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something more, and then he closed it again. Apparently, he’d thought better of speaking whatever was on his mind, and as curious as she was to know, Melody wasn’t about to ask.

“Good night.”

She watched him drive away until the car disappeared into the distance.

Instead of going to her room, Melody chose to go around the back side of the dorms, into the lush gardens that connected to the ones at the back of the academy. They seemed to sprawl endlessly, paths leading all the way across various idol dorm buildings and the campus of the main high school, and there were plenty of private spots to sit and think. She followed a few twists and turns to her favorite hiding spot, a little shady side garden with green ivy covering stone walls, a small fountain in the center.

Melody sat on the edge of the fountain, kicked off her shoes, and pulled up the hem of her dress so she could dip her toes into the cold water. It felt solid, grounding. Maybe if she tried hard enough, it could wash away the emotional murk she’d found herself in.

Concealed in the safety of the garden, Melody cried until she felt like she could no longer cry any more. In the end, things weren’t any clearer. She was only exhausted, ready for bed, and thankful that she didn’t have to go into the office in the morning.


	12. In Which Ranmaru Gives Advice

It was a Sunday afternoon when Ranmaru found Melody in the downstairs lounge, curled up on the sofa in casual clothes, her sketchbook in her lap. She was lost in her own world, tweaking a new multi-part arrangement she’d been trying just because she couldn’t get it out of her head. At first, she didn’t even hear him enter the room, but she waved halfheartedly when she noticed him.

“You look like hell,” he said flatly.

“Gee, thanks,” Melody deadpanned, barely looking up. She knew there were dark circles under her eyes. They’d been there for days at this point, and even liberally applied makeup couldn’t mask them entirely. Well, it _could_ , she supposed. It was just that she rarely wore makeup, and if she started suddenly coming to work with a full face of product, it would be like carrying a flashing neon sign that something had suddenly changed. Better for them to think she was just tired.

“How’d you like the new composer?” she asked, eyebrow raised.

“You should know that already.”

“Not feeling it, are you?” That much was obvious from their trial recording session. The music that their new trial run composer presented to the quartet was nothing like their usual style, and not in a good way. He failed to capture their personalities and didn’t seem like he was quite aware of the strengths of each individual member.

It was actually what inspired her to start writing. Much as she didn’t like the idea of someone else’s failure to capture what Quartet Night needed serving as motivation to compose… Well, she’d take what she could get. It had been a long time since she’d tried writing anything with more than two parts.

“None of us are,” he said with a sigh, plopping down on the sofa beside her. Melody subtly shifted to hide the sketchbook pages from him, turning sideways to face him as he spoke. “At least it’s just for this one song, though. How are the interviews going for the next option?”

“If you want me to be optimistic, we’ve had a few candidates come in with a little more experience than the last round, and two more weeks left.” Melody sighed, shaking her head. “If you want me to be blunt, poorly.”

Ranmaru snorted, nodding. “Well, I can always count on you to tell me the truth.”

“I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing,” she muttered, going back to scribbling in the margins of her sheet music.

“A good thing. Except when you hide your shit like this.”

Before she could blink, Ranmaru snatched the book out of her hands and

“Hey, give that back, you jerk!” Melody jumped for it, but he held it above her head, looking up at the pages instead of down.

“You write music? Like, _currently_? Not just in your past secret life that you don’t want anyone to know about for whatever weird reason?” His brow furrowed and he frowned, and Melody couldn’t tell if he thought it was garbage or he was just surprised.

“Occasionally. When I want to. Give it back.” She jumped again, missed again, and finally crossed her arms with a huff, waiting. Ranmaru, for all intents and purposes, entirely ignored her. He finally lowered the book a little, but seemed to have no intention of releasing it. His eyes scanned back and forth over the page, and by the time he finally spoke, Melody was incredibly nervous about what exactly he thought of the contents of the pages.

“This is _good_ , Mels,” he said seriously. She blinked, stunned into complete silence. Ranmaru rarely gave compliments, and was almost never so straightforward about them.

“You… you think? I know it’s a ballad, but I thought a darker sound like a rock ballad might suit you more than something… pop.” She bit her lip, shrugging and twiddling her fingers. It was one of the first times anyone had seen her music, after all.

“I’d sing this any day, and you know I wouldn’t lie to you.” He paused, looking down at the music again.

“So I’m part two, Camus is three, Ai is one, and Reiji is four?”

“Yep, that’s right. I tried for closer harmonies so you could all weave in and out of each other,” Melody explained. Ranmaru nodded along, eyes skimming over the music for a long moment before he finally looked up.

“Mind if I show it to the guys?”

“No, I don’t mind,” Melody said, shaking her head. “I wrote it for all of you, anyways.” She smiled shyly, fighting not to look down at the ground. It was embarrassing for someone to see her drafts after so long of writing only for herself.

“Good.” He closed the book and handed it back to her, but she barely had enough time to grab it before his hand was on her back and he guided her towards the front door. “Come on, let’s go.”

“Go… where?!” Melody spluttered, scrambling to shove her book in her messenger bag even as she stumbled towards the door.

“I’m taking you on a ride. You need to clear your head.” He shifted from pushing her forward to pulling her along by the hand, walking quickly around to the far side of the building, where some of the idols’ cars were parked. However, Melody quite quickly found out that Ranmaru wasn’t heading towards a car.

He tossed her a helmet, which she barely managed to catch, and swung his leg over the seat of a motorcycle.

As she looked back and forth between the helmet and Ranmaru, Melody was struck with the thought that she should have known he’d ride a motorcycle. It went with the whole “sexy rocker” vibe he had going, and the rocker vibe only got stronger when he was away from his admittedly more pop-oriented vocal group.

“Earth to Melody? Come on, get on.” He motioned impatiently, his own helmet already strapped on. “Turn on the mic inside your helmet so I can hear you when you put it on.”

Melody scrambled with the clasp of her own helmet for a moment, but managed to get it on and hesitantly approach the motorcycle.

“Um… okay…” she mumbled, tightening the strap on her bag and double checking that the clasp was secure. She swung her leg over and settled on top of the bike behind Ranmaru, already feeling a little unsteady. What was it you were supposed to do on a motorcycle? Wrap your arms around the person in front? Ranmaru cranked up the vehicle, and Melody hesitantly leaned forward, wrapping her arms around his waist. He felt strong and safe, though every second that passed made her feel more nervous.

“You’re going to want to hold on tighter than that, Mels.” He chuckled as they began to roll backwards, slowly pulling out of the parking spot. Half motivated by sheer panic, Melody slid forward even farther and locked her arms around Ranmaru’s waist, her chest pressed against his back.

“Is that bett— ahh!” She held on with a death grip as he took off, fighting against just closing her eyes as they rolled away from the academy and off towards the city. “Fuck, fuck, _fuck_ I’m gonna die we’re gonna die holy _shit_ , Ran!”

Ranmaru just laughed uproariously from his position in front of her, completely unaffected by her reaction or her death grip on his waist. Melody hid her face against his back, too terrified to even look up for the first part of the drive. However, around the time he made the first turn, she thought it might be better to deal with the terror of leaning to one side with her eyes open rather than closed.

“Where are we going?”

“You’ll see. Just hang on, pipsqueak.”

Ranmaru sped away from the school and out of town, off into the countryside. Fields and trees passed by as they rolled along down curving roads, heading for nowhere in particular, at least as far as Melody knew. Ran seemed to have a destination in mind, but she was content to leave it to him. The wind on her face was refreshing, and the sound of the engine wasn’t as grating and she feared it would be. Without a doubt, it would have been a beautiful ride…

… If Melody hadn’t squeezed her eyes shut in terror two-thirds of the time. She managed to loosen her death grip on Ranmaru only by a fraction by the time they finally made it to their destination, but her legs wobbled a little as she slipped off the bike.

He’d brought them out to an overlook.

The city looked tiny below them, the sun just starting to dip below the horizon, dyeing the entire world shades of pink and orange. It was a beautiful sight to behold. The overlook was completely empty, which was almost surprising, considering how lovely the sunset was.

Ranmaru quietly walked over and leaned against a wooden fence at the edge of the overlook, obviously set up for safety but serving more of an aesthetic purpose at this point. Tearing her eyes away from the sunset for a moment, Melody followed.

“So… why bring me here?” she asked quietly, bumping gently against Ranmaru’s arm.

“I come up here when I need to think sometimes. Thought you might need it.” He sounded a little gruff, but he always sounded that way. Ill-tempered though he might be, Ranmaru had his reasons for being as prickly as he was, and Melody didn’t blame him for not wanting to share. He’d opened up slowly, though, turning from real meanness to teasing and laughing, and she trusted him. He meant well, and he was kind to do this for her.

“Do I really look that bad?” She bit her lip, watching the sun slip a little farther behind the horizon.

“You look pretty bad, babe,” he admitted with a sigh. “Your dark circles are even worse than usual, and you almost fell asleep in the recording studio on Thursday.”

“There was a cat in my lap and I was comfy…” she muttered. Ranmaru brought his cat into the studio and Ryuu wouldn’t leave her be the entire day. It was just as well. She wouldn’t have been able to focus enough to get any work done. Even a week after she’d last seen Van, her head and her heart still felt swamped with a muddle of emotions with very little sign of clearing, and trying to manage work was difficult on a good day.

“And another thing: Ryuu is babying you. He doesn’t do that unless he knows something is wrong, and even though he’s a little shit, I trust his instincts.” He paused for a long moment, apparently waiting for Melody to protest. She didn’t. She knew he was right. “You want to talk about it?”

No.

She didn’t.

But she needed to.

“I…” Melody began, but immediately stopped, trying to think of what she needed to say. “I think I’m an idiot.”

Ranmaru gave a snorting kind of laugh, and she just glared at him.

“I’m sorry. That wasn’t what I thought you were gonna say.” He waved her on, schooling his features back into a vague semblance of calm. Melody took a deep breath, entirely foregoing any kind of planning, and simply spoke as the words came to her mind:

“I went on a date with Van and I shouldn’t have and now I feel like a fucking jerk and an idiot and I don’t know what I want from my life, and I feel like I’m a failure at everything I do and I thought that I was ready for some kind of relationship but maybe I’m not and what if I’m never really close to anyone again and I never find any kind of purpose and—”

“O-kay, that sentence is a runaway train we’re not coming back from,” Ranmaru said, clapping a hand on her shoulder. Melody spluttered, but couldn’t quite manage to force out real words.

Not only did she feel like a failure and a horrible person, but she felt weak for becoming so unknowingly attached to the idea of romance. She didn’t need that in her life. She hadn’t wanted it, hadn’t gone looking for it, but after having a taste of it, even with someone she didn’t think she could develop a lasting relationship with, she wanted it more than anything.

And that… that didn’t feel good either.

“C’mere.”

Ranmaru suddenly pulled her towards him, wrapping his arms around her in a crushing hug. Melody was stiff at first before she relaxed against him, hugging him back tightly. He couldn’t really do anything to stop it or make her feel differently, but… maybe this was all she needed. Maybe she just needed someone to tell her that it really would be okay.

“You’re not a failure. And if you are, then that’s okay.”

“That’s _okay_?” Her voice was muffled against his chest, but he didn’t loosen his hold, as if he was a little inexperienced about how long a proper hug should last. It was alright, though. Melody didn’t mind so much, though she felt a little overly warm as she snuggled against him, relishing the touch.

“We all fail sometimes, dumbass.” His fingers threaded absently through the ends of her hair, his tone surprisingly gentle. “That doesn’t matter in the end. What matters is what you do after.”

He… had a point, she thought. So she felt stupid. So what? What was the point in all this if she didn’t do what she needed to do to pick herself up? That was how she wound up here anyways, right? The entire point of this job was supposed to be something to bring her back to herself, to put her back on a track that made her happy with her life. Right now, she wasn’t happy… but she could be. This job, this place, and these people made her feel more complete than she had in a very long time. This wasn’t the end. It was just a setback.

She could deal with a setback.

“So, what are you gonna do about it, pipsqueak?” Ranmaru finally pulled away, immediately turning back to the overlook. The sky was almost completely dark now, the last glimpses of the sunset fading into night. She couldn’t see his face from this angle, and Melody wondered if he was avoiding looking at her.

“Well… for starters, I guess I’m going to work on that song,” she mused.

“Good.”

“Thanks, Ran.” Melody smiled, but he still didn’t look at her. That was okay, though. It was just the way he was.

“Any time.”

* * *

Melody hadn’t exactly expected Tokiya to take her up on her offer of going to sketch, but here they were. It was lunch break again, and they’d both packed something today, but instead of eating in the lounge or the break room, they were on a bench in the lush gardens behind the school. Lunch leftovers long forgotten, they sat with their sketchbooks and talked quietly.

For her part, Melody was working on flower studies. She sat longways on the bench, with her back against the arm rest and sketchbook resting on her tucked-up knees, facing Tokiya despite sketching the bush slightly to the left of him. Despite her badgering, Tokiya refused to show her what he was drawing. Every time she asked, he only smiled teasingly, though he’d appeased her a little by showing her some older sketches.

Melody looked away from the drawing for a moment, unconsciously fiddling with her necklace as her thoughts wandered. She’d worn the pendant almost every day since the mysterious package arrived, sometimes in the open and sometimes under her clothes, but lately it had become a lifeline to calm her thoughts, fingers tracing over the design until it felt like the world had stopped spinning. Sketching always made her feel calm, but today she just couldn’t seem to focus, even close to Tokiya, who also had a strange way of making her feel calm.

“That’s a nice pendant,” Tokiya said, nodding towards the compass around her neck. Melody squeaked, embarrassed to be caught gazing into space. She hadn’t even noticed he’d looked up from his sketch.

“Thank you. It’s a compass.” She opened it, showing the inside towards him as the needle spun and settled on North.

“Unusual engraving,” he murmured, going back to his drawing.

“It is.” Melody paused, closed the lid, and picked her sketchbook up again. “Where’d you get it?”

Tokiya tensed. Without moving a single muscle, his eyes slid back over to where she was.

“What are you talking about?” His voice was so carefully even that she knew he was trying to avoid the subject. Only Tokiya could have his perfect acting skills come back to bite him in the ass at exactly the wrong time.

“You’re pretty funny when you’re drunk,” Melody mumbled, cheeks growing warm. She shifted a little to sit properly on the bench, avoiding his eyes, though she couldn’t resist a quick glance over at him.

Tokiya flushed bright red, but to his credit, he kept his composure otherwise.

“What _exactly_ did I say?”

“You told me you wanted to hear me sing. It didn’t take long to put the pieces together.” Melody gently traced her thumb over the design on the back of the compass. “Thanks for the song.”

“What did you think?” he asked quietly.

“It was beautiful. _Is_ beautiful.” A pause. “I’d like to hear it sometime…?”

“Whenever you want.”

Melody glanced over hesitantly to find Tokiya smiling back at her. He slowly, carefully reached over and placed his hand over hers on the bench, the touch a comforting weight. Her cheeks felt oddly warm as she glanced from his hand back to his face, and even more so when he turned her hand over and twined their fingers together—

“Hi, Toki! Oh, hi, Melody.”

Tokiya dropped her hand with a start and pulled away as if it burned.

… Ouch.

“Hello, Haruka,” he said calmly, waving genially at their visitor. She seemed to appear from nowhere, but Melody knew that the garden paths were complicated, and it was difficult to see around turns.

“Hi.” Melody smiled, but she knew she must have looked flustered. “What brings you out here?”

“I was just taking a walk during my break. Cecil asked me to meet him, but I haven’t seen him around.” Haruka almost exclusively spoke to Tokiya, eyes darting towards Melody every now and then while she looked at him nervously, a pretty blush across her cheeks. She looked like a picture out of a painting surrounded by the flowers.

“We haven’t ei—" Melody cut off as her phone began to ring. It was Ryuya’s ringtone, too, so she needed to take it. “I’m sorry, I’ll be right back.”

She quickly put down her sketchbook and walked just around the next corner, far enough that they wouldn’t be able to hear her if she spoke quietly, and picked up the phone.

“Hi, Ryuya. What’s going on?”

_“No major fires today. I just called to see if you could pick up a package for me at the post office.”_

“Sure. I’m going to town later, so I’ll swing by and bring it back.”

“Thank you. I appreciate it.”

“No problem.”

Melody hung up the phone, but she didn’t move from her spot, listening carefully. If she peeked between the flowers, she could see that Haruka had moved a little closer. She could hear a little of their conversation, and thought it might be best not to intrude.

“So, I was just wondering if you maybe wanted to go out and see a movie sometime? And… maybe… dinner?” Haruka asked, stumbling.

Tokiya hesitated.

Melody held her breath.

It shouldn’t bother her. Why did It bother her? Haruka liked Tokiya, and obviously had for a while, and she should be rooting for them, not feeling whatever this strange disappointment was in her chest. It was tight and it hurt to think about, which was silly. Tokiya would still be her friend, still be the person she had slowly but surely become closest to around the agency. She wanted him to be happy more than anything, but… wasn’t she allowed to be a little sad about the fact that if they started dating, he would really and truly have no time to spend with her any more? It felt like she just found him. Losing him so fast would be… difficult.

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she almost missed his reply.

“How about Thursday? We have the evening off, and it shouldn’t be too busy on the town since it’s a weeknight.”

“That sounds great!” Haruka beamed, clapping her hands together joyfully. “So, um, seven o’ clock?”

“Sure.” Tokiya nodded, and Melody took that brief pause as her moment to scramble back onto the scene. She tucked her phone into her pocket and hurried back towards the bench, an apologetic smile on her face.

“I’m sorry, I’ve got to run,” she said quickly, throwing things haphazardly into her bag. “Ryuya needs me to head out on an errand ASAP.” Well, that was only half a lie.

“It’s your day off, isn’t it?” Tokiya asked, eyebrow raised.

“Well, you know what they say: no rest for the weary.” Melody shrugged and shouldered her bag. “You guys have a nice afternoon, and don’t forget about the PR meeting in the morning.”

“O… Okay,” Haruka said, frowning. Tokiya’s eyes narrowed, but he didn’t speak. She knew that look. Maybe she’d be able to avoid questioning later, but he was suspicious now. No reason for him to be, though. It was better if she ran off— give them some space before they had to get back to work.

“I’ll talk to you later, I promise!” she called over her shoulder, rushing out of the garden. Her cheeks felt warm, as if she’d just intruded on something very private, and perhaps she had. After all, Haruka just asked out her crush on a date. It might even be the first time she’d asked, and what if Tokiya had said no?! That would be heartbreaking, and then Melody would have to deal with the aftermath, too…

And frankly, she wasn’t sure she could handle someone else’s romantic issues along with her own.

She was finally starting to feel normal again, working on editing the song for Quartet Night and focusing on her actual job as Shining’s assistant more and more. Of course, Ranmaru hadn’t told her a single thing about the group’s opinions on the first draft of the song, but that didn’t stop her from working out kinks in the harmonies and trying to make things move along a little more smoothly in the bridge.

However, there was something she couldn’t shake about the situation with Van. They’d talked again, casually. Short conversations here and there. It was awkward, but not awful, and soon the awkwardness would probably fade. Melody still wondered what made her push him away, though.

She’d been ready. Or… she thought she had. What was she looking for that he couldn’t give her? He was kind and smart and handsome. Capable. Talented. A truly good person, and they got along well. What was _wrong_? What was _missing_? Was there something she was looking for that he couldn’t give her, or was she just afraid of the outcome if he could give her what she needed?

Or, worse, was there _someone_ else she was looking for?

And if so… why couldn’t she figure out who it was turning her in circles like this?


	13. In Which Things Get Complicated

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single woman in possession of too much work must be in want of a very long massage.

In lieu of that, it is _another_ truth universally acknowledged that pounding frozen cookie dough into submission works just as well.

They were three days away from leaving for the long-awaited summer album trip. Flights were booked. Bags were… Well, bags were not packed, but costumes and show props were, and those were arguably more important. They would be on the coast for a week, all staying at a beach house together at a discreet location, and traveling into town every day for recordings, concerts, and promotional interviews. The joint Starish and Quartet Night album releases were the biggest studio event of the year, and Melody was just glad to be finished with the planning. It was all out of her hands now.

Mostly.

Except for the fact that she had to be Haruka’s “chaperone” at the beach house. They all had their own rooms, but having another girl near the same age there was preferable when Shining, Ringo, and Ryuya all had their own matters to attend to and separate, albeit nearby, lodgings. Melody also had to make sure everything kept to the itinerary, and basically act as… well… an agent. At least while they were on this trip.

There was also still the issue of Van. Or, not so much Van, but whatever emotional knot in her chest that still needed untangling. She rather thought that it would be more useful to have an emotional _sword_ , Gordian Knot style, but that required… probably a therapist. And more time than she really had at the moment.

Thus, even with everything else winding down, she was still stressed.

That was how she wound up in the large communal kitchen, pounding the shit out of a frozen block of molasses cookie dough that she’d previously made and frozen. Oddly, it was doing absolute wonders for her nerves. Normally she wouldn’t cook here, but her small kitchen wasn’t exactly the best place for large cookie projects, and the countertops here were far more preferable from their size alone. She was so absorbed in the process, in the feeling of getting all her tension out via pounding out cold dough into a malleable lump, that she didn’t even hear the door swing open.

“Whoa, whoa! What did that cookie dough ever do to you, huh?”

Melody smiled sheepishly at Reiji, giving up on the dough for a moment.

“It’s pure evil. Extremely… uh… cold-hearted?” She shrugged, giving up on making any kind of coherent joke. “I don’t know. It’s been a long day. I wanted to punch something. This is my best option, and you guys get cookies out of it for the plane ride.”

“Ah, yes. Stressed about the trip?” Reiji retrieved a bottle of water from the refrigerator and leaned against the counter, obviously settling in for a conversation. Melody just sighed and went back to the dough.

“You could say that. In fact, it would probably be pretty accurate to say that,” she muttered, pounding into the dough so hard that the jars on the counter shook.

“Well, try not to worry about it too much. Except for that song, though.”

She froze, turning towards Reiji slowly.

“Ran showed you?” She winced, already nervous.

“He did. It needs to be ready by Wednesday, if possible. We have recording time booked, and we want to do a demo.” Reiji couldn’t keep a smile off his face as he spoke, obviously pleased. “We all really like it, Mels.”

“ _Really_?!” she squeaked, blinking.

“It fits us,” he said, nodding. “Any chance you have any more?”

“Uh, not— not on hand,” she stuttered, scrambling. “It’s the first one I’ve written for someone other than me in a long time.”

“Well, if you have any more, send them our way. You know we’re scrambling for composers, and it’s… Well, it was really nice to sing something that didn’t feel like putting on a jacket that’s a size too small.” Reiji came closer and patted her shoulder gently. Melody’s heart swelled, and she couldn’t help but smile. It felt like a weight off her shoulders to know that, and she was glad that she could help out her friends.

The summer album had been a struggle for them all. Haruka barely managed to get everything done in time, and releasing singles by new composers in between recording tracks was an exhausting process. Knowing that she was able to write something that they enjoyed singing, that didn’t have to go through thirty edits or fights with the composer about the sound or the style? That was a real relief for Melody, and she felt glad to know that they were relieved by it, too.

“I was worried I might grievously offend you, if I’m being honest.”

“You couldn’t if you tried,” Reiji said with a wink. However, he immediately backpedaled. “Actually, I think you could probably blackmail us all if you tried, but I humbly ask that you use your powers of observation for good.” He bowed his head for a moment, and Melody couldn’t help but laugh.

“I’m really glad you all like the song, Reiji. I do have a couple minor edits, but I’d really love to hear it.”

“Good, because we’d all be heartbroken if you weren’t there.”

Melody smiled, full of hope and gratitude, though she didn’t speak. How exactly should you respond to a statement like that? She turned back to the countertop, and suddenly had her answer.

“Feel like sticking around till the cookies are done?” She glanced back at him briefly, gesturing to the lump of now slightly thawed dough and an empty cookie sheet.

“Oh, you know I can’t resist a good cookie.” Reiji clapped his hands together joyfully and walked closer. “Can I roll them out?”

“Help yourself!”

Melody dusted her hands with flour once more and went back to the dough alongside Reiji. She thought that, considering the circumstances, a lump of frozen cookie dough was even better treatment for her mood than a long massage.

* * *

Tokiya felt restless.

Though his roommate was fast asleep, Tokiya lay in bed staring up at the ceiling. Their flight left tomorrow, and it would be wise to rest before the whirlwind of promotional activities scheduled for next week, but sleep refused to come. His thoughts were swirling and murky and his heart wouldn’t stop pounding.

It was late Thursday evening, and he’d gone on his date with Haruka just a short while earlier.

She was sweet. Kind. The same Haruka he’d known for a long time now. She blushed when he pulled out her chair for her at dinner, and he’d caught her looking at him during the movie. They talked about music, about work, about new songs and about dreams for their future careers.

And at one point in his life, he was certain all of that would have captured his heart completely. At one point, she had completely and totally held his heart.

Now, though… it didn’t feel like enough.

It was silly, in a way. Haruka was all he’d ever wanted… or so he’d thought until a few months ago. That was when he started to realize that the attraction to her had faded. Innocent and oblivious was cute, but she was as kind as she was _dense_ most days, and that was a little exhausting. Haruka was passionate about her work, yes, but… what else was there to her? Music was an inseparable part of his life, the biggest part, but if that was all they could talk about… then that was a problem, wasn’t it?

He found himself wishing for more casual company. Someone that was perhaps a little less pure and innocent, a little more pragmatic. A little more of an enigma. Someone that didn’t mind rambling with him about anything and everything, and that would gladly talk his ear off about something they were passionate about beyond music. He never quite understood how wonderful it was to watch someone talk about something you knew nothing about with this spark of _life_ in their eyes until…

His phone vibrated from its place on his nightstand, and Tokiya picked it up, giving up entirely on sleep.

**_Melody:_ ** _Are you awake?_

His heart took off racing again.

**_Me:_ ** _Yes_

She responded almost immediately.

**_Melody:_ ** _How did the date go?_

**_Me:_ ** _As well as could be expected._

**_Melody:_ ** _… Is that Tokiya speak for “passable?”_

Tokiya chuckled under his breath, trying not to wake Otoya.

**_Me:_ ** _It’s Tokiya speak for “there won’t be another one.”_

He could have put it more gently, but it was Melody. She didn’t need things to be put gently for her, and she was as blunt as he could be about them. He also wanted to make perfectly clear that he did not have feelings for Haruka. At one point… Well, much like the rest of the group, at one point he’d been hopelessly in love with her, but that time had passed. They’d spent so much time together that she was more like a sister to them now.

**_Me:_ ** _More importantly, why are you awake? It’s late for you._

**_Melody:_ ** _It’s late for you, too_

**_Me:_ ** _Yes, but I had evening plans. Are you just awake for no reason?_

It took her much longer to respond to that than it should have.

**_Melody:_ ** _Maybe_

**_Me:_ ** _Can’t sleep?_

**_Melody:_ ** _Basically._

**_Me:_ ** _So you checked in to see how my date went in the dead of night?_

**_Melody:_ ** _You’re just the only person I wanted to talk to. I thought I’d see how you were doing._

That did it.

Tokiya closed the messaging app and dialed. To his surprise, she didn’t pick up immediately. The phone rang for so long that he thought it should have gone to voicemail, but at the last possible moment, she picked up.

“Hi, Toki.”

Good lord, she sounded exhausted.

“What’s wrong?”

“Wow, straight to the point.”

“Yes. What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine. I’m just… having an evening.”

“Are you drunk?”

“No!”

“Are you _tipsy_?”

“… Maybe.”

“I’m coming up.”

He hung up the phone without another word.

* * *

Melody didn’t bother moving from her position on the sofa when she heard a knock at the door. The only light on in the room was a dim lamp in the corner, casting shadows across the floor. She hadn’t really felt like turning on any lights once she finally returned home after a long day.

It was a particularly bad day, too. Lost paperwork, rude managers, and wild goose chases all across the city. She’d been soaked in the rain and caught in traffic, and hadn’t really had time to eat lunch. Thus, when she walked in the door, she was too exhausted to do anything but make instant noodles for dinner and open a bottle of wine.

And then she remembered about Tokiya’s date.

It seemed unwise to text him, but she’d been honest. She didn’t want to talk to anyone else at the moment, and something about sitting alone in the near darkness with a bottle of wine was too depressing to fathom, even after the day she’d had. What she didn’t expect was for him to come up and see her.

She looked… not terrible, but not good. Her hair was slightly damp and curling haphazardly as it dried from her quick shower. She was wearing pajama shorts that were probably too short for polite company and a camisole that left a chill on her arms, but she didn’t really care. Ready for bed and slightly drunk. What a great time.

“It’s open.”

Tokiya walked inside only a moment later, looking even more sour than usual. In fact, he looked especially sour for a person who had gone out on a presumably-mostly-pleasant date.

“What have I told you about locking your door?” He sighed as he closed the door behind him, locking the deadbolt with a click as if to make his point.

“It’s not like anyone here has it in for me,” she grumbled, pouting.

“You live in a building full of _men_!”

“You’re telling me that someone in this building is going to come into my apartment uninvited and subject me to their nefarious plans?” She raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms over her chest. To her surprise, Tokiya came closer and sat beside her on the sofa, throwing a blanket over her as he did.

“I’m a man, too,” he muttered, looking even grumpier than usual for a moment. He avoided her eyes as he settled in beside her, arms crossed over his chest as he stared over at the opposite wall.

“Are you here with nefarious plans?” Melody pulled the blanket up a little around her as she spoke.

“You never know.”

Melody shifted to snuggle up beside him, resting her head on his shoulder. Tokiya tensed for a moment, but he let her do as she wanted. Still as warm as a furnace— maybe that was just the way he was naturally.

“You’re not nefarious. You’re just grumpy.” She closed her eyes, already regretting drinking at this time of night. Her head felt a bit fuzzy, though it was slowly starting to clear.

“I am not,” he muttered rather grumpily. Tokiya reached out for the wine and took a sip directly from the bottle, nose wrinkling at the bitter taste.

“That ended badly for you last time, you know,” she pointed out, but didn’t actively try to stop him.

“I know. I won’t go overboard this time, though.” He put the bottle down, and Melody tried not to think about the implications of drinking after him. That never mattered much to her, having parents from the States who weren’t raised in Japan, but she knew it was a big deal here.

“So, why the drinking? Long day?”

“Very,” she muttered. “I still haven’t even packed for the trip, and our flight leaves _tomorrow_.” Melody groaned, squeezing her eyes shut as if it would block out the inevitable travel. She took another long drink of wine and then entirely gave up, handing Tokiya the bottle. He followed suit, and they were silent for a long moment as he stared at the alcohol, swirling it around with one hand.

“I’ve been trying to avoid it, but I believe I need to simply tell her that I can’t be with her,” he said flatly. “There’s no way for the trip to go smoothly. I’m dreading what happens when I tell her, but it’s inevitable at this point…”

“ _What_?!” Melody suddenly sat bolt upright, turning to stare at him with wide eyes. “Why?”

“Well, among many other reasons, it’s a terrible idea to start a relationship in this profession.” He sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than Melody, though.

“Is that all?”

“That’s not a small thing!”

Melody pursed her lips, settling back against the sofa. She wasn’t sure what was bothering her so much about this, only that there was a nagging voice inside her that wanted to know why.

“What would it take for it to be a small thing?” she whispered, staring off into the middle space between them and the opposite wall.

Tokiya didn’t speak for a long moment. Melody wondered if he was trying to puzzle through her statement, and she also wondered if the knot in her chest was just heartburn from the wine or if it was something else entirely. The thought struck her that she wanted to hug him, to slide closer like she had been only a moment ago, but a sudden flare of panic stopped her.

Maybe it was just the wine.

“I…” Tokiya spoke hesitantly, never finishing his sentence. He took another sip of the wine before he continued. “It would take someone I absolutely need in my life.”

“What about you?” he asked softly.

“Me?” Melody’s nose wrinkled, and she risked a glace over at him, cheeks unbearably red. Ah, that was certainly the wine. “What _about_ me?”

“What would it take for you to date an idol?”

“Ah, ah— this conversation is _not_ about me right now,” Melody said with a laugh. “No changing the subject.”

“I’m _not_ changing the subject,” Tokiya pouted, settling back against the sofa. He leaned in a little closer, shoulders now touching just like she’d wished they were before.

_Oh._

That was nice, she thought, though Melody resisted the urge to rest her head on his shoulder. Her skin felt flushed and her heart was suddenly beating much faster than only a moment earlier. She didn’t dare move, out of shock or out of fear of shattering the moment, but the vague notion that she liked being this close to him cut through her fuzzy thoughts right before he spoke again.

“Humor me.”

Something about his tone kept her from saying no.

“Okay, and this is all hypothetical and assuming a _lot_ of things, but… Someone who makes time for me, not who only sees me in their free time. I know it’s hard work, but I want to be able to lean on each other. Talk about our days. I want to learn something new about them every day. I want them to tell me the truth, even if it hurts. I want them to be the only person I want to talk to when—”

Melody stopped abruptly, mouth hanging open.

_Oh, God._

The tiny flare of panic in her chest suddenly jumped into a raging flame. It felt like something _clicked_ then, snapping into place when she hadn’t even noticed it was there before. It was natural, and _right,_ and already there when she barely even noticed it before.

Unfortunately, it appeared that she was already too stupid and too late to do anything about it.

“I— um— I think I should go to bed,” she stuttered, suddenly standing from the sofa. The blanket fell from around her shoulders and she suddenly felt cold and a little naked only wearing pajama shorts and a tank top. Melody snatched it from the ground and wrapped it back around herself.

“Are you feeling alright?” Tokiya stood, too, stepping closer even as Melody stumbled away. It was a futile effort, though, as he caught her wrist and pulled her in close to him. She gave a quiet yelp as he pressed his forehead against hers, his free arm coming around her back to hold her in place.

“F—fine!”

One single thought changed her entire perception. Every touch was too close, comforting and anxiety-inducing all at once, and she couldn’t decide if it would be better to be closer to him or farther from him. Should she tell him? No. Absolutely not! He’d just come from a date with another girl—another _perfect_ girl—and that had to be the wine in her talking. Maybe all of it was the wine.

Melody glanced up, her eyes briefly meeting his.

“You’re very warm,” he murmured, but he didn’t move away from her.

She very rapidly concluded that it wasn’t _all_ the wine.

“I’ll be… I’ll be fine…” she whispered, feeling a little caught in place. She couldn’t look away, watching as his gaze dropped to her lips, just for a moment.

Her heart felt like a pounding drum in her chest. Melody was afraid to move, afraid to not move, and found herself tilting her face upwards to look at Tokiya, leaning in as grip on her waist tightened, as he dropped her hand to pull her against him.

The touch was feather-light, the barest brush of his lips against hers, and then he pulled away, watching as if checking for her reaction. She didn’t move, but she felt her cheeks flush, mouth slightly open as she stumbled for words that never came.

Drawn in as if by a magnet, Tokiya leaned in for another kiss, longer and lingering, his fingers tangling in her hair and his lips slanting against hers. A soft sigh escaped her, almost against her will, as she hesitantly reached out to touch him, fingertips brushing the hair at the nape of his neck. That was, apparently, all the permission he needed to wrap his arms around her, groaning softly as he pulled her close. Tokiya’s grip was so tight that all she could do was hold on, her arms around his neck and heart racing as she kissed him back.

… Until her thoughts caught up with her libido and she broke away, dizzy and gasping.

“Whoa, whoa, stop, pause, do not pass go!” Melody spluttered, pulling away slightly. “I… am… _confused_ …?” she said slowly, still breathing a little hard.

“I thought I just made myself _very_ clear.” Tokiya raised an eyebrow and Melody felt herself flush an even darker red.

“But— I— what about Haruka? I thought… you…” she trailed off, mouth hanging slightly open in shock. They went _perfectly_ together. Genius composer and multitalented idol? It was like one of those too-perfect celebrity couples that couldn’t possibly be real. Of _course_ he had feelings for Haruka—half the idols employed at Shining Agency (and quite a few _not_ employed there) had feelings for Haruka! So what if he said he didn’t— anyone would want to cover that up in a situation like this. They could lose their jobs and cause tension in the groups, and it wouldn’t make sense to be open about it, even to someone you were close to.

… Right?

“I already told you I didn’t have any feelings for her— what, did you think I _lied_?!” Tokiya looked utterly confused, his expression likely a perfect pair to hers.

“But you… you acted all weird when she showed up in the garden!”

“I acted strange because she caught me trying to _hold your hand,_ and I knew she had feelings for me. Wouldn’t you be flustered in my place?”

“I— wait, _what_?!” Melody knew her face was as red as a lobster, but there was no point in trying to hide it.

“For an intelligent person, you’re very dense,” Tokiya groaned. “I thought you were being coy.”

“Have I ever been intentionally coy even _once_ in the entire time you’ve known me?” Melody asked flatly. Tokiya opened his mouth for a moment, then paused, pressing his lips into a flat line.

No. The answer to that was “no.”

“You’re an idiot,” he deadpanned.

“You are, too.”

“Apparently so…” Tokiya mumbled. He brushed his thumb over her lower lip, lips slowly forming a sly smirk. “Though, in all fairness, you didn’t seem to _mind_ kissing me.”

“Wha— you _jerk_!” Melody smacked his shoulder while he just laughed, leaning in to kiss her cheek. It felt like her entire body was on fire, like she wanted to crawl in a hole or hug him close and hide her face away against his shoulder.

“You can tell when I haven’t eaten lunch— you can’t tell me you didn’t even have an inkling.” His lips brushed her skin as he spoke, and she fought back a shiver, bit back the urge to lean closer and kiss him again.

“I didn’t. I thought… You know what I thought.” She thought he wanted Haruka. She thought he was lying.

“So you were going to push me off on someone else because you thought it would make me happy?”

“Uh-huh,” she squeaked.

“Then you’re a bigger idiot than I thought.”

He leaned in to kiss her again, but something flared in Melody’s chest. Panic, irritation, confusion, or possibly just too many emotions at once— she couldn’t really tell in the moment, but she placed her hands on his chest and shifted away a little, trying to clear her head even as she blushed furiously.

“T—Tokiya, wait. You can’t,” she protested. “ _We_ can’t. It’s just… I need a minute.”

“Are you going back on everything you _just_ said?” Tokiya’s brow furrowed as he blinked, drawing away from her. “Everything about being together, about supporting me and finding someone and…” His eyes flicked to her lips, and her cheeks burned. Melody shook her head, fumbling. There were too many thoughts whirling around in her mind, and she couldn’t manage them all right now.

“No, I— I just need time. I wasn’t expecting this, and I need to think about it—”

“Is this because of Van? Would you rather have him? Because I can leave, if that’s the issue.” He started to turn away from her, that same pride of his taking over, but Melody caught his hand. It was more instinct than anything, not to let him go, words tumbling out of her mouth faster than she could really think through them.

“Tokiya, _no_! Fuck, I told him I couldn’t date him because I couldn’t shake off what I felt for _you_ , and it wasn’t fair to him.” Melody groaned, covering her face with her hands. Her heart rate skyrocketed and she stumbled through a mess of thoughts, trying to pick out the most important pieces.

“… Really? You told him that?” Tokiya breathed. Melody peeked out from between her fingers to see him blinking in astonishment.

“I mean, I didn’t tell him it was _you_ ,” she admitted. She hadn’t really been _aware_ it was him. “It’s not like I _meant_ to— to— I didn’t mean for this to happen!” She backpedaled, spluttering, trying to avoid telling him something she couldn’t easily take back.

“Didn’t mean for _what_?” Tokiya pressed.

“Never mind.”

“Melody?”

“Hm?” she squeaked, half frozen with fear and half transfixed by his gaze.

“If you don’t want me, then tell me. Don’t try and let me down easily, if that’s what you’re doing.” His voice was barely audible. “Be honest with me.”

Honest?

Honest was complicated.

“I can’t _have_ you,” she whispered just as softly. “Tokiya, I realized exactly how much I care about you all of three minutes ago, and then you were just there with the— with the _you_ and the _kissing_ and not that the kissing wasn’t nice, but I need time to figure out if I even think this is a good idea to pursue this and I just don’t know what to do. I think I’ve had too much wine for this. Or possibly not enough.”

Tokiya just sighed, smiling a funny kind of bemused smile that made something in her chest twist. He hugged her again, whispering against her hair.

“I think I like seeing you flustered, but that’s not an answer.”

“I don’t want you to risk—” she began, but he wouldn’t let her finish.

 “Do you feel anything at all for me?”

“It’s not that easy—”

“Yes or no?”

“… Yes. Of course. I feel…” Melody paused, eyes fluttering closed. “I feel _everything_ for you.”

“Then why would you support me if I chose to be with Haruka and not my choice to be with _you_?”

She couldn’t quite put her finger on the reason. There was something there holding her back, some fear or anxiety or hesitation hidden deep in her heart, but she wasn’t even sure what it was, herself. Tokiya let go and stepped back, taking her hands in his as he looked into her eyes. He seemed to sense that she wasn’t ready to talk, or perhaps that she didn’t know how to put her thoughts into words

“I’ve been thinking about this. I promise that I have, ever since I sent you that compass,” he said slowly. “If you need time to think about it, I understand.”

“You would be risking so much more than me,” she said, shaking her head. “It doesn’t feel fair.”

“Your job is at stake, too,” he pointed out gently. However, it didn’t seem anywhere near the same to her.

“Your _life_ is at stake. Your entire career in music, and I know how much that means to you. Don’t tell me you don’t care about the risk, either, because that’s bullshit and we both know it.” Melody pursed her lips together, and he just sighed. However, despite it all… he smiled.

“I think we were supposed to find each other.”

Melody’s heart felt like it was on fire and melting at once.

“I won’t say I’m not nervous, or that I don’t care about the risk. You know me too well to think anything else. I care about you, too, though.”

There were a million thoughts running through her mind. Too much risk, though she couldn’t say there was too little reward. It was _Tokiya_ , after all. Her friend, her… potential lover. If it was possible to blush any more at that thought, she would have. She couldn’t imagine not having him in her life, though, and it was clear to her now that seeing him with Haruka made her feel embarrassingly jealous. It was too much to process all at once, and she didn’t want to jump into this without thought, but…

“And I care about you,” she said softly. “I just… need… just a little time. I’m sorry, I promise that it’s not your fault. It’s nothing you’ve done, and I’m just being—”

“Shhh.” Tokiya cut her off, pressing a finger to her lips. “Take time. Not too much time, though. I don’t want you to regret this, but I would really prefer if you didn’t make me wait forever.”

Melody forced a watery smile. She wasn’t sure how he could be so good to her, or so gentle under all that prickly snark, but here he was.

And she wouldn’t make him wait. She would do what she needed to do to process this, to think through her options, to figure out what she wanted from her life. So many things were up in the air right now. It seemed like some of them were finally starting to fall into place, though. Tokiya was one of the most important pieces, she hoped. Something about him felt so natural, so perfect, that she wasn’t sure how she could be so lucky as to stumble into it. Now it was up to her to make sure she was prepared, so that she didn’t mess it up.


End file.
